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I think it’s fine/good to include them.

Don't feel like I really know what I'm talking about here, but I would lean toward including the photos, I think, for my 3yo, if only because maybe it won't develop as much of the stigma of what the NG tube means for her if she is exposed to it early and often as something positive that was helping to get her healthy and well?

@Mrs. Turtle: I’m no expert, but I’d lean toward using photos from that time but trying to include mostly ones that show you and/or your wife holding her, or ones where she has a favorite stuffie with her, or something like that rather than pics of her alone. Basically, ones that will reinforce that there were some good things happening at that time as well as scary, hurting things. Maybe choose several you think are the best and then let her decide which of those she wants in the book?

I would try to be as matter of fact about it as possible - the NG tube helped you eat, you were in the hospital because you needed help/were sick etc. I don't shy away from showing D pics of himself with tubes everywhere, although our circumstance didn't involve the kind of trauma O's must have. I have lots of pics of D at various stages with different medical devices (NG tube, g tube, iv ports, colostomy bag, oxygen assistance, etc) if she would like to see that other kids also go through that stuff.

@Mrs. Turtle: I know it’s really different, but my son had a traumatic accident a little older- he had just turned two. We don’t have a ton of pictures, but we do show them to him. He was also very verbal and has, for the last two years, spoken freely about what happened which is so hard for my husband and I but we realize is good for him. My understanding is that normalizing it helps it not be frightening. All of which is my super long winded way of saying- I think you’re right to include the photos. It’s the story you tell (and augment over the years) that will inform how she processes them. You’re narrative seems super age appropriate and that is what will grow as she does.

I think you should include them. It’s just part of her story.

Not exactly the same but DD broke her leg and still remembers it/ talks about it- she was only 2 1/2 almost two years ago. We have the photos in our family album even though it would have been easy to exclude them- it was horrible and difficult especially since she already has orthopedic issues.

My parents were very open about my struggles as a newborn, but to be honest I really hate seeing the pictures of myself with the feeding tube. Now that I’m a mother myself and I can (sort of) imagine the pain my parents went through in the beginning, it just makes me sad. I agree with an above poster that the ones where my parents are holding me are much more palatable. I really don’t like seeing myself alone in the NICU with the tube and machines. Of course I can’t remember any of it, but it just makes me uncomfortable to see.