My close friend just texted me that her son was just diagnosed with Austism.
What is the best way to respond?
My initial thinking was "oh, wow! I'm sorry" but I definitely don't think I should be saying sorry. Right? Or no?
She is a teacher.
Just wondering the best way to approach this?
If your kid had/has Austism what did like or did not hearing?
grapefruit / 4418 posts
My friend wanted to hear I'm sorry, that sucks! BUT, he's so lucky to have an amazing support system and he will thrive!
pomegranate / 3127 posts
I don't know what to say, but just stay in her life. That'll mean a lot to her. Which sounds like I'm saying the obvious, but I have a close family member with autism (not even the really severe kind) who threw toddler style tantrums in public for many years. The family slowly stopped seeing friends and relatives, being invited places, inviting people over. It was easier at the time then constant embarrassment, but now that I have the perspective of it being a while ago, I wish people had at least made the effort of inviting the parents to do adult stuff together if hanging out as a family always ended in meltdowns.
grapefruit / 4079 posts
Thanks for sharing. That must be a lot to take in. How are you feeling? Do you need anything?
cantaloupe / 6669 posts
When I don't know what to say, I usually stick with:
- I'm glad you're sharing this with me.
- I love you (or your kid).
- How are you feeling? (Or any other question that will help me know how to respond.)
hostess / wonderful apple seed / 16729 posts
@youboots: @ladybee: @daniellemybelle: Thanks!
@catomd00: Yeah, I can see some wanting to hear that but I don't know.
@Mama Bird: Thanks. It's good that you said it. Good advice. I'll be sure to check in on her.
kiwi / 656 posts
I think I let her talk for a while and said something like "that is a lot to process, how are you feeling?" And it was clear she was upset, so I said, "it's always hard to hear things like this, but it's great that there are so many resources for him/you." Mostly I just asked questions and let her talk though.
wonderful clementine / 24134 posts
I always say, I'm sorry to hear that (ak not sorry for the kid) and maybe follow up with a But I'm glad you have some answers and can move forward with a plan. Let me know if I can help.
nectarine / 2987 posts
I go with one of thank you for sharing/that's a lot to process/how are you feeling depending on the person. Then I ask how I can be supportive.
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