How do I break the post-daycare TV habit? It started out as an occasional thing and now is every night. I get home with DD around 6:30ish and bedtime starts around 8. It's usually 2 episodes max of either Mickey Mouse Clubhouse or Sesame Street. I didn't really mind because she's at daycare for 10-11 hours without any screen so what's one hour? But now when she finishes dinner it's all Mickey? Mickey? Mickey? She's a broken record. I want to also start "taking" it from her when she doesn't listen on our way home from daycare (wants to walk, touch the snow with her bare hands, eat the snow, go back down the stairs and repeat). I just fear the tantrum meltdowns that I know will come!
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How old is she now?
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For DS, we use that time as rough house with daddy time and/or family dance party time. It helps us all get the wiggles out so he is good and ready for bath and bed. This works only because we put off cleaning up, etc until after DS goes down for the night.
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Man, I have the same issue.
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Redirect with another activity. After dinner we pull out the Legos, a different set of books, or some other "after dinner only" toys. DD, 19 months, knows that's the routine. Since DH is home by then, she enjoys those blocks/books/toys as her "daddy toys".
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@PawPrints: 21 months.
@travellingbee: She is OBSESSED! Just a broken record - Mickey, Elmo, cracker? Repeat x 1000.
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Right when we get home from daycare he goes into his pack n play so we can prep dinner. He has some milk, and his books are in there. After dinner we play in his room. I am sure no screen time will get harder and harder as he gets older. But I feel your pain. The occasional music videos I let him watch on youtube create EXTREME meltdowns when I turn them off.
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@Mrs. Microscope: I feel like it's almost like sleep training to break the habit. It's gonna be a couple rough nights at first but hopefully she'll learn it's not an every night event? We do have legos so maybe I try that.
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Taking something away from a toddler that they are used to getting is really hard. There will be screaming and tears. I would start by sitting down with her, ideally a couple of times like maybe the night before and the morning of the day you plan to go cold turkey, and explain to her "I know that in the past you have loved watching Mickey but we are not going to do that anymore" etc. Then just be firm and stay nearby as she cries/screams, expect this for a couple of nights probably before she starts to adapt. Definitely have some other awesome things she can do instead, like maybe a new set of crayons or books - maybe a Mickey book!
Not sure if this would work for you, but our 23-month-old's routine is get home from daycare at 6:00, play with daddy for 10 minutes while I heat up the previous night's leftovers for her and place alongside a piece of fruit and maybe cheese and something else, then she's eating by 6:20. After dinner we clean up her face, then upstairs to start the bedtime routine, and she's asleep by 7:15. 8pm is pretty late to be starting bedtime at 21 months.
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@LindsayInNY: This is a great way of thinking of it - breaking a toddler habit is like sleep training. First night horrible, second night a little better, third night starting to be okay.
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@PawPrints: Yeah, I fear the screaming and tears most... It's just me until 7:45 most nights when DH comes home. That's the reason for the later bedtime. But it's always been that time and works for her (she's up at 6:45 then).
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@LindsayInNY: Oh that is tough if you're solo. Godspeed! Maybe a Mickey book or Mickey toy could help. Our DD is obsessed with Elmo and she flipped out (in a good way) for the Elmo "Big Enough for a Bed" book we got her to help with the crib-to-bed transition.
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ALL. THE. DISTRACTIONS. We just went through this with my 26-month old--I noticed she was turning into a train wreck on the days we watched TV (hers was Super Why) so I just quit it cold turkey. I say things like "Oh! We're not going to do that right now. Let's color!" or something else that will get her super excited. (Stickers are usually a big hit if she REALLY doesn't like the idea of no TV.)
The first few times were rough--lots of tantruming and tears. But now she's hardly asking for it anymore!
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We cut tv/videos on all devices altogether because lo1 was getting out of hand with it and couldn't handle limits we tried to set. Like, wanted to watch at all times she wasn't at daycare. We told her the tv was broken, hid the iPad, deleted YouTube and Amazon apps from my phone. All cold turkey. She was a little tantrummy about it at first but it's been 3 months and she never asks now.
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@PawPrints: Hence the TV habit! I want time with her but I have such little time in general at night that I try to do other things too. And she winds down so it *was* a win-win...
@mfa_lady: It just slowly spiraled from occasionally to every night!
@nana87: "Broken" usually works too - good call!
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@LindsayInNY: What @PawPrints said. Can you get some Mickey or Elmo books? DD is obsessed with Elmo but we usually don't let her watch. If she does happen to ask, we redirect her to her books. We've got Big Enough for a Bed, Elmo Loves You, and My Name is Elmo and she loves all three.
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We had to go cold turkey. It was the only way. The ipad got hidden and we make sure the TV is never on while he's home at night. It just got too hard to transition him up to the bath and bedtime if he had any night time screen time. Now he comes home and asks to play legos or paw patrol usually. We suffered big tantrums for a few days, but it got better.
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@psw27: It never occurred to me that even just having it on could be an issue. I try to play toddler music but she'll still ask for TV. Guess I know what we're starting tomorrow night...
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@wrkbrk: Hold up. Our kids are the same age, your boy will sit in a pack n play with books and milk while you prep dinner?!? Mine would down the milk in two seconds, and then begin screaming and climbing until he found a way to topple the pack n play!! Boy will not be contained unless he's sleeping.
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@Truth Bombs: HAHA yes and I think honestly he is an introvert and that's why. A full day of daycare causes him to need a brief battery recharge! He also seems especially mellow on Friday nights after a full week of socializing haha. Totally the opposite of me!!
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@wrkbrk: Oh my kid doesn't necessarily want to socialize (though his 4 year old sister may force him to) but he DOES want to be destructo man. Last weekend he walked over to his sister's little ATV ride on, rode it over to the kitchen table, climbed on the HANDLE BARS and then got on top of the kitchen table. WTF kid?? I'm legit shocked he hasn't climbed out of the crib yet. And if he does, I'm screwed because he can open all the doors too.
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@Truth Bombs: Hahahaha. Aw, he sounds smart but tiring! Cooper does try to climb up on the coffee table.
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Could you get a couple special toys to help distract her the first few nights? My son loves the Water Wow books, or maybe a new book or puzzle or something to keep her occupied and take her mind off the TV.
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Somebody just reposted this on one of the RIE groups, kind of timely: http://www.janetlansbury.com/2012/07/how-to-break-your-toddlers-tv-habit/
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We used to tell my son that his TV friends went night night or bye bye. Those are concepts he understood at that age and made sense to him. Now at 30 months we just say no and distract with something else.
I agree Elmo books or Mickey books might work as a transition item. Especially the ones where you push buttons and they make noises and talk. DS used to have this Elmo cellphone toy from Playskool that he liked too. During bath we play songs from the shows he likes and we bought him some small figurines of those characters and he pretend plays. And we print out coloring pages of those characters from the Internet and do coloring time.
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What about getting a Mickey Search and Find book? My DD (25 months) has been doing them for several months, and I got my niece (same age) a "my first" Mickey Search and Find.
I know it won't be a painless switcheroo, but a redirection of energy nonetheless.
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Its such a hard time in our home. I really want to be able to be there for my daughter and help her transition home (she is introverted and school is absolutely exhausting for her), but I'm also really tired and need to make dinner and take care of the baby.
Audio stories? For awhile my daughter would listen to an audio story and play quietly. Lately she has more pent up energy and needs to be physical so we've been doing indoor obstacle courses (like, jump on the pillow five times, do six jumping jacks...).
I've been trying to find the right balance....basically she needs some quiet time on the ride on home, then when we are almost home I talk to her about what I need to do (change the baby, nurse the baby, then we can do x, then I have to make dinner). I try to give her two choices (we can color together or read two books together).Our most successful evenings have been: come home, engage fully in activity together (its best if its active), I give her a five minute (or whatever) warning that I have to go make dinner, then I go do that. Sometimes putting on a story or music helps. I also have to plan ahead dinners that take 30-40 minutes max, so that I have time to be with her.
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I think it is a few rough nights and then they adjust. My daughter (4!) gets like that if we turn off Mickey Mouse too. They put Mickey Mouse at that time for a reason! Geez.
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Cold turkey is the only kind of thing that works with my son, I am really the problem, though if I am being honest. I am caught in this constant cycle of giving it back and taking it away and it's just caused issue after issue so as of this morning, it's away permanently.
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My daughter is 2 and she just can't handle watching TV. The rare occasions we let her leave her asking for Mickey/Elmo, etc. for days on end. It's just easier in the end to not let her watch it even if that makes it harder on you in other ways. Do you have a learning tower? I find that ours is an amazing help when my husband isn't home and I need to cook dinner or prep for the next day. We made ours using an ikea stool so it wasn't a huge investment.
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@theotherstark: She hasn't really taken to the Water Wow books. She likes to "eat" the brush instead... LOL. We do have some new-to-her puzzles so I might try and focus her attention there!
@SweetCaroline: Oh, good call! I have a Sesame Street one that my sister got from a friend. I'll bring that out but also look for a Mickey one!
@looch: Same here... We've been having rough nights getting home from the car and I threaten no Mickey that night but don't follow through. I really need to start though.
@petitenoisette: We don't have a tower or space for one... Sometimes I'll have her sit on the kitchen counter next to me. But honestly dinner for her is usually ready within minutes because she's hangry. It's weird because she wants TV but then 1/3-1/2 the time does other things and has it like background noise.
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That time period is the hardest part of the day for me---when you have make dinner, but your kids are needy.
My kids are decent at "playing", it's just that for the 19th month old, her play right now is at the destroy and destruct stage. And that's totally developmentally normal, but it really cheezes me off that in the 15 minutes of prep time I need to make dinner, she can dump every food item out of the play kitchen, she can dump 3 different sets of blocks and mix them all up together, she can find a pen under the couch and try to color on the couch, she can climb the bathroom counter and try to get items out of the medicine cabinet, she can scale the toy shelves to pull down big sister's puzzles and dump those pieces on the floor. She's fast, and high energy, and curious, and a climber. So I turn to TV for that time period a little too often then I'd like to keep my sanity.
I know it's a stage, and part of it is personality (my 1st is so chill in comparison! She would color quietly and I used to give myself so many pats on the back!), but yeah....it's rough. The kitchen helper might help, but we already have a stool and then she also wants to literally do what I'm doing (hold the knife, stir the boiling sauce) or she tantrums and that causes issues too.
I empathize!
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It will only get harder as they get older, so just rip the bandaid off now. Plan to get takeout or easy meal preps for dinner so you can spend lots of time distracting and redirecting.
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I'd say just don't turn the TV on. Be sure that you have a space where LO can access their toys and introduce a few new things (like magnet blocks, or other brain power type activities).
I usually let LO watch 1-2 episodes of Daniel Tiger after school, but only a few days per week. On the off days, I just prepare her on the way home that we're going to have no TV that day.
We don't do any TV or screens between dinner & bed, but we have a very sensitive sleeper, and the extra screen time would totally mess with her ability to sleep.
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@catomd00: We (aka me) have easy dinner prep for her as it is because she comes home so hangry. It's a lot of microwave/re-heated items and fruit AKA quick things. I'm going to try and curb the TV starting tonight and save it for occasional times and not nightly.
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I've found what works best for my LO is that I typically say no and redirect when she asks for peppa. However I will randomly offer her Peppa or a show, but when she's sort of not expecting it. Sometimes she says no, sometimes yes. Granted, I have a larger window of time I'm working with since I SAH part time. I've found that she's not yapping constantly about it this way. I haven't set an expectation or developed a pattern (even though I secretly have but its on my terms instead of hers).
I do have the TV off during the day.
She often brings her peppa books out when she's jonesing for a fix. -
@LindsayInNY: good luck!!
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