Did you circumcise your son? Why or why not? Would you make the same choice again?
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I don't want to deal with circumcision!! If we have a boy, we'll get him circumcised though..
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We have a girl. But if we do have a boy, we'll have a bris, because of our religion.
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We did not circumcise Charlie...
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If we ever have a son, I don't want him circumcised. But hubs does. I told hubs that if he decided the circumcision was best, then he'd have to do every single diaper change and bath until baby was 100% healed.
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I left the decision up to my husband and wanted our son circumcised to be like him. I did not do the care post-operation as I was too squeamish for a few days but I was okay after everything started to heal.
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I personally don't believe in circumcision for infants, and although I do understand and respect people's religious rights, I still wish infant circumcision didn't happen at all.
Why?
There are very few benefits (and even those have shaky scientific backing), and several risks involved. It is not recommended by any national medical organization in the world.
Circumcision carries several direct risks such as botched circumcision, dangerous and excessive bleeding, damage to or loss of glands, damage to or loss of entire penis. It also carries some indirect risks including infection, urinary blockage, meatal stenosis, adhesions, and has even caused deaths.
It's not as safe as people may think. About 18 out of every 100,000 babies die during the process.
Circumcision also carries some delayed risks including tight circumcision (which causes painful erections), hidden penis, curved penis, and sexual dysfunction.
Newborn circumcision is also extremely painful, both during and after the procedure.
It's a traumatic event. Circumcision can affect breastfeeding, sleep, and even maternal bonding. Some studies have also indicated that men who are circumcised have a lower pain threshold in adult life.There are also many sex related reasons to leave a boy's foreskin intact. Newborn circumcision is sexually damaging because it removes healthy tissue with sensory, protective, and sexual functions. It can cause decreased sexual sensation for men, and can cause vaginal dryness and pain for women because of the decreased lubricating gliding action of an uncircumcised penis.
Over time, a glans exposed by circumcision can become thickened and keratinized, further decreasing sexual sensation (this is particularly problematic in older men and can lead to ED).I believe that newborn circumcision violates a person's right to bodily integrity and freedom of choice about his body.
Newborn circumcision also violates a person's freedom of religious choice about circumcision, since it is not the child's choice at all, but rather the parents.We definitely will not be circumcising our children.
P.S. Sorry if this was more than you were asking for, I just read "why or why not" and thought I'd share our reasoning. It was not meant as an attack on anyone else's decisions, it's just my personal opinion.
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If we ever have a son, I doubt my husband would be on board since he isn't circumsized himself. He's English and it's pretty rare that it's done in the UK (outside of religious reasons). That said, to each his/her own!
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@chopsuey119: I feel the same way! I was relieved LO was a girl and I didn't have to deal with it but if #2 is a boy we will likely circumcise him...I don't want to think about it.
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Told dh it is up to him he says he wants it done, and I'm ok w that.
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We have not/will not be circumcising our son.
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We will be due to religious tradition on my side and DH wants it dine as well.
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We decided not to if LO was a boy but she's a girl so it was a non issue.
The reason we decided not to was because it really wasn't medically necessary and there is no religious significance for us. I wouldn't put my daughter through an unnecessary painful cosmetic procedure either. -
We did not circumcise Mavrick. We figured it would be best if he was the "same" as daddy. Hence my husband isn't circumcised.
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@Arden: wow! You were so well informed. I knew enough to make my decision, but definitely not all that!
I chose not to circumsize my son, I couldn't find any medical reason to do so. After watching him get blood drawn in the hospital, I'm SO glad I didn't. I couldn't watch him have blood drawn without crying. My husband agreed.
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If we do have a boy, then it'll be a decision he's free to take if he wishes when he's an adult. To be honest, tradition or no, I can't approve of unnecessary surgery on a child.
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@Arden: Everyone has their own opinion. I disagree completely with yours and you will find that there is as much evidence supporting the opposing view to yours, that's why it is such a contentious issue. You can say that it's not meant as an attack or judgement on others but that is certainly how it comes across.
Tbh I think this is one of those issues that is best not tackled on an anonymous internet board. People have their own views and you won't change them, you will only stir up a hornets nest.
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We are not having a boy but if we did, he would be circumcised. Just like one of our English friends who did not want their son circumcised, we feel our son should be like Dad.
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We won't be circumcising if it's a boy. Personally, I prefer sex with uncircumcised penises. And it's not something I could stomach doing to a perfect little baby, but I appreciate the religious and cultural reasons that motivate others.
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I thought that the circ was a routine procedure done after the baby boy's birth. When we were at the hospital for our tour, I asked about it, and was informed that the hospital considers it major surgery and requires general anesthesia, so they will not perform it unless medically necessary. So, we didn't circumcise, but will revisit if there are complications down the line.
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We are having a son and will not be circumcising him. DH is not circumcised, either. DH is also in medicine and (according to him) there's no proven medical benefit to circumcision.
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I'm on the fence but I'm leaning towards not circ'ing our sons. DH is circumcised, and that is the ONLY reason why I'm considering it - to have the boys look like their dad. DH doesn't have a preference.
I'm a nurse and during my mother/baby rotation, I had to assist in several circumcisions. It was not a pleasant experience.
I have seen many debates on birth boards and whatnot. There are plenty of sources supporting both sides of the argument. I personally feel that it isn't medically necessary, but I feel the pressure from society (in the US) to circ my boys so they "look like the other boys" and won't get teased. My midwives said that the circ rate is about 50% - so my "worries" about society may be unfounded.
We still have time to decide.
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@cupcakemama: I thought that Arden's post did a good job of not being an attack or judgement? I do think it's good for people to discuss issues as education can definitely help inform people in making tough decisions!
@winniebee: I've seen several references to medical benefits from circumcision:
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/01/18/health/18global.html
http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9F03E7DD1E3FF931A2575BC0A96E9C8B63
That said, "The American Academy of Pediatrics does not recommend routine neonatal circumcision, saying its medical benefits — including a slightly lower risk of urinary tract infections early in life, a lower risk of rare penile cancer and a lower risk of sexually transmitted infections later — are meager."
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/08/23/health/23consumer.html
Personally, we didn't circumcise Charlie because it's a decision that you can't easily unmake. So I made the personal decision to leave him as he is for now (given the lack of overwhelming benefit) and I figured that he would be in a position to make his own decision himself in the future if he wanted to.
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@Shimmer: Supposedly, rates are significantly down:
<< The slide portrays a precipitous drop in circumcision, to just 32.5 percent in 2009 from 56 percent in 2006. The numbers are based on calculations by SDI Health, a company in Plymouth Meeting, Pa., that analyzes health care data; they do not include procedures outside hospitals (like most Jewish ritual circumcisions) or not reimbursed by insurance. >>
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/17/health/research/17circ.html
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If we have a boy, then I will let my husband decide. He is circumcised and will probably decide to have our future son(s) circumcised as well.
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@mrbee: Right - there are arguments in favor of medical benefits, but there is nothing conclusive one way or the other - ie, that medically it's the way to go or the way not to go (again I'm not in medicine!)
I do not have strong views on it either way - I more or less left the decision up to my husband - and he feels strongly about not circumcising.
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@mrbee: Interesting! Thanks for the link!
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I really don't understand the "look like dad" argument. First of all, I don't think dads sit around comparing penises with their kids. Second, baby penises and dad penises look NOTHING alike, regardless of circ status.
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@ohapostrophe: I think the argument is more that the dad will feel matched to his son, as opposed to both feeling like they match?
The dad will definitely see his son naked, unless he manages to avoid every single bath and diaper change!
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@ohapostrophe: Even though I have that as part of my to circ or not to circ argument, I agree that it's a strange concept (to me!) to have the boys "match" their dad.
That being said, DH is circ'd, but he doesn't have a preference as to what happens with our boys. *shrugs*
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@Shimmer: it kind of makes me laugh!
I also don't get the "don't want to get made fun of in the locker room" argument, which I've seen elsewhere. DH always says that it would be the kid looking and making comments about someone else's junk that would get made fun of! I just think it's such a private thing (and for that reason I won't discuss what we chose to do), but oh man people get worked up about it (on both sides)!
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We didn't even though DH is.
We feel it is unnecessary and weird unless for a religious reason.
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@ohapostrophe: Yeah, DH said the same thing about the locker room comments. A lot of high schools are doing away with one open shower in favor of stall showers in our area anyway... so it may not even be an issue!
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I really appreciate everyone's comments! I know this is a strong discussion for many, but honestly that is what I need to hear. My husband and I are on the fence leaning slightly towards not circumcising if we have a boy. My husband was circumcised for medical reason around the age of 5 so we kind of have an alternative perspective. I've looked into both sides pretty heavily and I wanted to see what concepts motivated most peoples decision on the topic.
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I lol at the match their daddy thing too! I asked DH if his father was cric'd, he gave me this look and said 'I don't now! Why would I look at my dads junk?' and so ended our discussion about matching.
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My DH was circumcised to "match his dad". While I'm leaving the decision up to him (and requiring him to do research into it), I am opposed to the idea. Cutting off body parts when the body part is not causing harm to the person seems like a bad idea to me. If we were Jewish, I wouldn't question it, but we're not.
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@cupcakemama: I'm very sorry if I offended you.
I shared my opinion because the OP asked why/why not and wanted to know our reasoning, so I was just trying to share the basis behind our decision. I think that it is important to talk and share about these important issues, as long as we do so in a respectful way.
If you would like to share your opinion and the evidence for circumcision, I wouldn't have a problem with that at all. -
@mrbee: I just don't think an internet forum is the appropriate place for such a detailed discussion on such a personal issue. I think people need to do their own research in their time. And not feel judged by others if they go against the popular or loudest opinion.
@Arden: as I said earlier, for every study against there is probably a study for. Do I feel like sharing evidence? Not really. It's not my place to educate you or anyone else. I am not holding myself up as an expert on the subject. Just a mum who had to make the decision and took it very seriously. I also completely respect parents who went the other way and choose not to go into depth about my personal decision as I would not want others to feel bad or attacked about their choice.
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@cupcakemama: Sorry, we can't really ban a discussion topic when it's about a decision that many parents have to make!
All we can do is ensure that there are no personal attacks in people's posts... I think that was the case here. If you feel otherwise, please do leave a post on my wall and let me know which language you feel crossed the line! I'd be glad to take a second look.
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@mrbee: i'm not saying that anyone crossed any lines nor have I requested a topic be closed. I simply feel that this is not the place for an in depth discussion on the issue. I hope I am allowed to disagree with another poster and actually say so rather than just exiting the thread without leaving a comment.
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46 comments