I don't know what to do about this, and I would like advice. DS turned one at the end of February and DD turned 3 in the middle of March and we have yet to receive a gift from my brother and SIL. That's fine if they don't want to give them gifts, doesn't bother me, but their son, my nephew, has his birthday in a few weeks. Do I buy him a gift? Do I call and ask them if cousins are exchanging gifts? Do I not buy him a gift and assume that we aren't exchanging gifts?
We have in the past and they remembered the birthdays because they called on DD's birthday (but I think it was mostly to tell us they were pregnant).
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We exchange gifts in my family, although usually at a birthday party. I would probably buy the cousin a gift, just because we are very close with our nieces. Maybe just ask your brother in a laid back sort of way?
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DId you invite them to a party or something?
My brother and I just exchange gifts between our son and his son, but usually at a party, if that makes sense.
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@looch We live in TX and they live in NY. So, I didn't invite them to a party because I knew they wouldn't make it. Would it be different if you didn't live close to your brother?
My nephew is the only cousin they have, and I guess it makes me sad to think that they won't exchange gifts. Is that strange?
Plus then I'm the Aunt who doesn't buy him gifts.
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Its tough being far apart. I am horrible at mailing gifts, but in this situation I would send something small to your nephew.
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I would send a gift. Doesn't matter you didn't get one.
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@MamaBehr: Ok, so geographic distance. Understood. Even in those situations, I'd send something for my brother's son, not sure if he'd think to reciprocate, to be honest.
I'd send something, just so you've closed out your obligation, but I am weird like that.
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I would (and do) send gifts to my nieces and nephews despite them living out of state so I would in your situation too. Another reason I love shopping on Amazon since I just ship it straight to them! We also send invites to out of state family just so everyone feels included.
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I'd send a gift because I'm a gift giver, even if I didn't receive anything. Be a bigger person and send your nephew a gift. It wasn't his fault!
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Like others have said, I would send a small gift. Don't punish your Nephew for his parents' lousy behaviour. I'd probably let it go this time, but if it happens again I would ask them what's going on with the gift giving if it's not reciprocated. If they genuinely keep forgetting I would go out of my way to remind them a couple weeks before your LO's birthdays.
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I would send a gift. I wouldnt ask.
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I wouldn't go tit for tat about gift exchange. If sending a gift is in your heart then do so.
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My nephew's birthday was right before DS's first birthday. We sent my nephew a gift; my sister/BIL did not send anything for DS and I doubt we'll get anything for DD. I'll still send presents to my nephew because I don't think he would understand why he didn't get a present from us. Plus I think my sister failed in this respect, since it was her responsibility to send a gift or card for my kids, not my nephew's.
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I would send something. It's not the kid's fault that your brother and SIL didn't send a gift, so I wouldn't want to make them suffer for it.
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13 comments