Hellobee Boards

If the above advice doesn't work (unfortunately, it really doesn't with some people) tell them that they can either text to ask OR if they happen to be walking by (yeah, whatever), you will place a sign on the door if your kids are free to play--but if it isn't there, they aren't free and please don't disturb them during dinner/homework/family time by knocking. It could be a little sign from Etsy or some sort of ribbon, or just a piece of paper with a handwritten note, etc.

You have to just ask them to check first. You are not being fair by expecting them to read your mind. Tell them that you really enjoy spending time together but you would like advance notice, even if it's a same-day txt, before stopping by.

If you are not clear up front then you will never have a good relationship with them.

we're a family that likes to drop by (and have always had an open invite for others) but i've figured out who wants to be bothered and who wants the heads up by people being clear about expectations! so i would say, be clear that you'd like a heads up! i would never think it's annoying to drop by, but i also don't have a problem saying that a time doesn't work for us or come back at another time.

Agree with everything @birdofafeather: and others have said. We also function well as a "just dropping by" family, the girls love it, but I get that it doesnt work for everyone - including us some times.

One of my fave neighbor families is very laid back and casual about things. They stopped by one night when we had just sat down to dinner and it just wrecked everything. She and I chatted and I explained that the minute they stopped by it was down hill from there, tantrums, not eating, etc...She totally understood - we now have a firm "text first" if its near dinner time. And its been no issue....all it took was a 5 minute conversation...

I vote for being upfront and it will work better!

@2PeasinaPod: same! this is how we play too...

@Alba4: I feel like maybe they should be getting the hint not to do the "pop in" but like others said, just be clear and say planning ahead works better for you guys.

@2PeasinaPod: I’m in the same boat. I love when people just pop by (especially because t helps pass the time in the evenings) and it seems like most of my neighbors don’t mind either (when I was wary of it at first I got a lot of “No seriously, stop being weird and just come hang out” kind of responses). If they’re new to the neighborhood they’re probably trying to make friends. Coming from someone who is probably doing the interrupting I like the suggested response from @mrsbucky. Or next time you’re hanging out and about to leave you could just say something like “Just shoot me a text next time you guys want to come over.”