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I will probably call him Hubs

ETA: I will use partner in threads, only referring to mine as Hubs

Either "my husband" or "Mr. Deer"

i've been trying not to use DH, i've been using SO, but it still feels forced. i think i might use mr. bird, but that's still pointing out his being a man and that we're married, so essentially it's no different than DH, except it's not that gross. i dunno. i'd love to see other's suggestions!

I don't have a problem with DH in a response since that's what's applicable to me and calling him Mr. Rattles points out gender and marital status anyway. I'd use SO when starting a post.

Why can't we use DH anymore? I vastly prefer DH to Hubs. Typing out Mr. Swedishfish takes too much time.

@rattles: I agree.

husbandy. the only correct response to wifey.

ETA What's wrong with DH (or DW)?

I have always thought "DH" was cheesy but its the quickest way to type out who he is. constantly typing "my husband" is too long SO feels like something you'd say about a boyfriend rather than a spouse. When I talk to people who know him I call him "B" because that's his first initial and I"m lazy... but if I used that in posts people would be like who now? Lol. So I'll probably keep using DH bc I'm lazy.

I also plan to keep using DH, but just not when starting threads anymore. I will use SO.

I hate the "D" of DH. Granted he is occasionally... I may start referencing him as The Dude (Big Lebowski anyone?), it's what I call freinds' SO :-). I'll try to reference "SO" in posts though!

@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: I really think the point was missed. Not using DH to describe your heterosexual legally recognized relationship is not being more inclusive. Being mindful of the way you phrase things when speaking to or referring to groups of people that may include people with partners of the same gender is what I think people are referring to when they suggest "not using DH."

Ex: Exclusive post - "does your DH snore?"
Inclusive posts - "does your partner snore?" "does your wife/husband snore?" "Does the person you sleep next to at night snore?"

I don't use DW/DD/DS because I find it cheesy but if DH describes your relationship go for it.

@Fronkinzankinsbride: Eh I use "DH" to refer to my husband mostly because it's faster to type lol. Same reason I use "O" instead of "Ovulation" and "TTC" instead of "Trying to conceive"!

TBH (another acronym!) "Dear Husband" is kind of cheesy to me, but it's the accepted short form of "Husband" so I use it. The only reason I don't like SO (when referring to myself) is I used that while I still wasn't married, and something with "husband" in it seems more appropriate to me (not that I have issues with ummarried couples!)

Is there a gender neutral form of "DH/DW" that still communicates that you're married to that person? We should invent one lol.

@pui: I agree. We should invent one. I also had the thought when reading your response that we could change the accepted shortened term for husband or wife to something else. I mean who says we have to use DH/DW? The knot? Haha. Who made that up?

I call DH...DH but anytime I start threads I usually try to use SO. Glad to hear that is a good thing to do!

@mrsjazz: same

I think I've always said SO when starting a thread but DH has become a habit when talking about my husband in posts.

*cough* when I write DH I think dick head... *cough*

I've been trying to use SO more often, but I might just start typing D, his first initial.

Hubs. Not everyone's married here (you can be engaged without ever marrying, and it's typical to not get married) and everyone can get married, in church even.

I've only ever called him my husband or hubs. I'm good with that.

I've always used SO when talking about partners in general - mainly because I want to include the two men who post here regularly and the one bee I knew wasn't married to her partner (there are more I'm sure, but I only know of one personally).

That said, I might use this thread as a prompt to give my husband an identity. I remember I went into counselling a few years back and, on my last session, my therapist pointed out that I had just used my boyfriend's name for the first time since our sessions had started - up until then, I had always called him "my other half". I went home and thought about it and realised how little he actually meant to me as a person. I was clinging onto the relationship because I wanted an "other half". I really do value my hubby as a person so I should try to use his name (or in this case, a made up name!) when talking about him, instead of referring to him by his *role*.

I'll have to have a thinky....

EDIT: I've got it! I've got it!! I'm going to call him Cherrypops!