On the recent child spacing thread, while most have kids 2-3 years apart, I noticed one person said they were doing a 4-5 year age gap so one can be in school and the other in daycare. I can't imagine being able to pay for two kids in daycare! How do you WOMHs plan for this?
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Our plan is 4-5 years for this exact reason. I can't imagine how we'd afford 2 kids in daycare or for me to stay home with the expenses that go along with having 2 kids. But, we plan to send LO to private school so who knows. We'll figure it out somehow or just be one and done.
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We'll probably have our kids more like 3-5 years apart b/c I'm a WOHM. My job is very stressful and forces me to work long hours. One child is already really tough to handle, and the newborn phase was the hardest. We want to have a second child in the future, but we are planning on waiting a few years until I have more seniority at my job and we feel like we can handle the newborn phase again.
I'm not as worried about the daycare expenses, but there are still considerations that make us want to wait for baby #2.
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As much as I'd love to try for a 2nd (I'd like to try for a girl), the fact that I'm a WOHM has made us lean more towards being one and done.
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@rahlyrah: me too! guess we'll see a few years down the road :::sigh:::
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Yup, we are waiting longer so that we have fewer years with two in full time daycare. We won't wait 4 or 5 years but we will probably wait closer to 3. Additionally I want more time to get back into the swing of things at work before another leave.
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I'm a WOHM and we will be trying for #2 when LO is 15 months old. It will definitely be expensive to have two kids in daycare but I don't want to give up my career.
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I WOHM but we have family close by and don't have to pay for childcare. Our kids will be 19.5 months apart.
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I haven't even had #1 yet (hear that kid?), and I'm a soon-to-be WOHM planning on having the next kid within the next two years. Age is part of it as well (I'm 34). Ideally I think the would be at least 2.5 - 3 years apart, but time is running thin!
I think siblings are important, though. At some point you may not listen if your mom tells you "that outfit looks awful, change" but you'll listen if your sister tells you, heh.
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I'm a WOHM with 5 month old twins. It is definitely expensive to have two in daycare, let alone two newborns! But somehow, we're making it work.
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We will probably have 3 in daycare/preschool at some point. It will be expensive but we will make it work.
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We want our first two to be about 2-3 years apart but the third to be about 3 years later so we only have two in daycare at a time. We could do 3, but it would be awfully tight so if we can prevent it, we will. And 3 in 5 years is too hard on my body anyways
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I am still currently preggo with #1 but our plan is to start TTC for #2 when LO is 2 years old. I envision getting the fever a little early and maybe trying to push DH to bump it up to LO being 18 mos.
Daycare is approx $250/week for DD (due in Aug) in the newborn room. That drops as they get older and I think you get a 10% discount with the second. So I figure we'll be looking at $450ish/week when #2 arrives. I bring home $4400/month right now - so its still a no brainer that we can afford it. Plus it should only be two years of that or so before DD is enrolling in pre-school...which will be a financial relief.
For us, me giving up my career is not an option and neither is having an only child. So we'll find a way to make it work!
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No, it didn't affect our decision. It's a short term thing to have two in daycare so we figured that we would just make it work.
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It will be right but with my age we will have to have two in day care at one time. We also want them 2-3 years apart.
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We decided to have them close together so that we wouldn't need to pay for a nanny for so long. Have them both taken care of at once and then be done. My job absolutely necessitates more flexible care than daycare.
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We're just going to try to save up where we can and bite the bullet to have our kids somewhat close in age. If we get pregnant the first time we start trying for #2 (January), our kids will be almost 3 years apart. It's further apart than I wanted, but that's just the way things are working out.
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We were planning on spacing our children out more but recently found out that we have to pay an annual storage fee for our frozen embryos. So, even if we begin TTC again next year after LO is born in a few weeks, we will have paid over $1,000 to save our embryos. In terms of paying for daycare, we will just have to make it work. Right now DH and I work opposite schedules so we don't need full time daycare which helps.
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Our considerations are a little different, but being a WOHM definitely comes into play. If it were up to DH, we would start trying for LO #2 when this one is about 9-12 months old. However, because we get a year off for mat leave, I have to be back at work for a certain amount of time before going off again. So we're looking at more like 2-3 years between kids.
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Interesting how everyone is different! @Mrs. Jacks: I bet if you have two LO at home, one nanny is probably the same (or maybe even cheaper) than two in daycare!
For us, we couldn't just make it work, though. If our income stays relatively the same, we wouldn't be able to afford full-time childcare for more than one. So I guess we better hope that our income goes up!
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We are still trying to figure out what we're going to do. I've always wanted 2 and convinced DH. After I had LO I wasn't so sure due to the toll pregnancy took on me, my unplanned c-section, and of course, the cost of childcare.
I am currently unemployed (searching hard for a job!) and would like to be at my next position for at least a year before I get pregnant again, so if I get a job soon we may try to get pregnant next year when I'm 36. But we can't wait too long because I want to be done by 38.
We have a nanny share, we'd probably have to just have one nanny for the two and maybe daycare part-time for LO. So much money!
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@daniellemybelle: Our nanny's price wasn't going to go up with 2, so we might as well do it all at once. They'll both go to school full-time at the same time, so our transition to no nanny will be pretty seamless in the future.
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I struggle with this, as well. The cost of a nanny around here would be almost the same as having two kids in daycare, so it wouldn't be worth it for us. We would need to have a significant bump in household income to be able to afford having two kids within the next 4 years, but if we wait 5 years, I will be 37 and I'm not sure I want to have another kid that late (not that 37 is late in general, but I consider it late for ME. Being pregnant the first time around at 32 was quite exhausting, I can't imagine doing it when I'm 5 years older than I am now).
Things are really tight right now with LO in daycare, and even though his rate will go down when he turns 1, it will only go down by about $50/week.
There are twins in his class (infant rate) and their parents have two other kids in the daycare, too. I have no concept of how that could work!
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We don't have kids yet, but my cousin planned her spacing out for this exact reason. She will have LO # 2 this fall. Then she will be off for a year (we are in Canada) and when it's time for her to go back to work next Sept, LO # 1 will to go school full time, and LO # 2 will take LO #1's spot at daycare. She planned it to go exactly like that, and it worked.
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Our spacing was not affected by the cost of daycare, we knew it was a necessary evil. DH is against the idea of a nanny, he likes the curriculum at our daycare. My decision was based on the fact that I started a new job in February and did not want to have our next LO until I got through a full busy season at my new job, so that means we need my EDD to be after April 15th and after I get through Q1 close for my corporate clients, so the best time is to have a LO in June or July or after September 15th. So, our real decision factor is tax filing deadlines. LOL, I'm a dork.
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@Mrs D: This is exactly us too. Daycare is expensive, but so is having a family so we will go for it and figure out how to make it work.
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@littlek: I totally understand! I consider that strategic planning as opposed to dorkiness.
Timing can be everything!
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I hadn't really thought about spacing as it relates to expenses. DH wants two close together, but I am in the one and done camp. Daycare for two would be extremely cost prohibitive.
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Cost of daycare is not a factor for us. It's age.
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Nope, I had always planned on being a WOHM and our goal has always been ~ 2 years apart.
I make enough to make it worthwhile to still work with 2 in daycare. And FREE family health insurance which is worth more than daycare!
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I guess there is a point where it's tight but most of you can "make it work," which is awesome! My take-home pay after daycare for two or a nanny would be negligible, though, and we wouldn't be able to make ends meet on DH's current salary alone. So for us it's either insure that DH increases his salary significantly in the next two years, or wait until the first one is in school. I guess an option is me increasing my salary, but I'd much prefer to be a SAHM than to make more money just to put two kids in daycare - that's just my preference.
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It's a huge factor for us because I have a 3 hour commute with my current job. We haven't even talked about #2 because there is no way it would be possible until I get a job closer to home. I'm also battling the age thing- I had my first at 34 and don't want to wait too much longer before trying for the 2nd.
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It will affect our number of children, we'll be one and done. Does that count?
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Our current two are 27 months apart. We already reconfigured our childcare arrangements when Eloise showed up this winter, and now use a full-time babysitter in place of daycare. (This both gives us more flexibility with the schedule as well as saves us some money). If we do have a third, it would be so great if Owen (now 2 1/2) were in kindergarten. But, I am also already 36, so not sure if that is going to happen or not. I hate that our family planning decisions have to be based so much on finances, but it is a huge factor.
Timing can be everything!
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