Hellobee Boards

@Corduroy: I can only sort through toys when they are out of the house. I take anything they haven't played with in awhile and it either gets donated or tossed in the trash (only if broken or missing pieces). Back in February I sent both kids to my mom's house for the week since I was redoing their room (getting rid of the crib and putting in bunk beds). I took out all the toys and dumped them in the middle of the room to sort. I got rid of three trash bags worth of toys and I feel like I didn't even make a dent!

I did tell DS what we were doing, that I was going to donate toys he didn't play with anymore so that he wouldn't be shocked when he got back. But honestly, it took months for him to ask about certain toys. Luckily he never really got upset over anything.

I'm actually getting ready to do this again since we got a bunch of toys from my in-laws when they moved!

I agree with @KT326 in that I have the most success in doing this when my kids are gone. I also keep a big diaper box in my younger daughter’s closet, and am constantly adding things to it. It’s rare that they ask for anything after I’ve gotten rid of it.

I also took a bin of toys I didn’t want to get rid of and just put it in the basement a couple months ago. I plan on rotating that out with other toys at some point.

Edited to add that I’ve never taken out all the toys at once because I would find it overwhelming, but I go through our toy spaces regularly. If you were able to get an entire day to do it I’m sure you’d make great headway!

I regularly go through toys and get rid of some but now that my oldest is 5 it doesn't work as well anymore. Thankfully I stayed on top of it when he didn't notice as much.

One thing that worked well was letting him consign toys this spring. He really wanted a train set but it was after his birthday and he had already spent all his birthday money. He's 5 and doesn't earn money for chores so he was really having a hard time finding a way to get more money. I told him he could consign toys. We wound up cleaning out a lot of big stuff the kids were done with and only ended up with one small (expensive! ) train set in return.

We have two plastic totes in the basement to keeps extra toys in (for rotation). I also use that as a place to set aside things they are done with and donate. I try to do a big purge before Christmas and birthdays to compensate. Plus we've encouraged grandparents to give activity gifts instead and they have been willing to oblige.

For a treasure loving kid, I think I'd create a special treasure box. When it is full she could pick something to take out to make space for the new. Whatever toy limits you set, you just have to stick to them but make room for your kids to choose what stays and goes.

When DD was little I was constantly sorting out toys to get rid of. I always did it when she wasn't around. But once she turned three or so it became much harder. So now, at 4.5, we do a couple of things. I still occasionally sort toys without her but I put them in a box in the garage for 3 months - if she asks for something in those 3 months I bring it back in but if she doesn't, I get rid of it. I am generally pretty tuned in to what she cares about/plays with so I have only had to rescue a few things from the box. We also will ask her to pick "x" number of toys she no longer plays with or wants a handful of times a year. We started small, just one at a time, but now we have her do more.

I try to stay on top of toys throughout the year but we do a big purge in November, right before DD's December birthday and Christmas.

Also, we have really been pushing family to give less toys. We encourage them to purchase experience gifts, art supplies, or books. Thankfully many of them are willing to do that. We have found that the more we can prevent things from ever coming in, the easier it is to deal with what we do end up with.

I do sort of a combo-approach to this. My kids are younger so I can still make decisions for them and not feel too badly about taking away their ability to make independent decisions but I try to turn it into a teachable moment as well.

We do the whole "these are going to go to kids who don't have toys thing". I have my 4 yo old pick a toy or two to give away. And the next day I purge out a few things and keep them put away for a few days to see if panic sets in with the realization they are gone. Then I donate. She hasn't gotten upset for anything I've ever taken away; if she asks, I say that the toy was given to kids who don't have toys. So I just stick to my donation party line. I know this will get more challenging as they get older, but I'd like to think I'm going to keep a firm grip on this one because in no way will our house every get inundated with toys or crap. We live in a big city and space is at a premium so marie kondo method or not, we *HAVE* to keep on the things that spark joy or have an identifiable purpose. Plus clutter just puts me in a bad mood. I am reminded of this every time we visit my SIL in the burbs or some of my friends houses. They have SO MUCH SHIT that never gets played with. Actually what works best is getting rid of stuff before it ever gets played with. I guess I filter what even attempt to enter the house from family gifts, birthdays, etc.

My kids are the same age as yours and we sort the toys together twice a year. They have summer birthdays so we do it around birthday time and around Christmas time. Usually right after the influx of gifts but sometimes before. The narrative looks something like this, " we have some fun new exciting things! But remember that we only have a certain amount of space for our things. So if something doesn't fit in a container we don't need a bigger container we need fewer things. So we're going to look at your box full of cars. Look they don't all fit. So we need to move enough of them to this bag that they all fit. Then this bag can go to other kids who don't have as many cars."

If there's a protest my response is a matter of fact, " part of my job is to keep our house clean and safe for you. Keeping our house clean and safe means not having too many things. I know that you like your toys but we are going to make them fit in our space now. If it's too hard for you to help me that's fine I can do it without your help and you can play in the other room. I will do my best to keep all the ones that I think are your favorites"

And I don't expect them to stay with me through the whole process. Usually I turn on some music and they help with some of the sorting and then eventually they sort of drift off and play together while I keep plugging away at it. I might do the final tidy up after they're in bed but they've seen enough of the process that it's not a shock and that they're learning that this is a thing that people have to do. I think the key is to really try to not make it emotionally laden. This isn't a huge deal, you haven't done anything wrong, I'm not being mean and getting rid of the toys we just need to make them fit in our house. It's just another chore.

Sorry for the novel

@Corduroy: way to go!!