Hellobee Boards

No. My family is very laid back and casual.

Nope, not at all. And I was always shocked at church when gfs would tell me their moms would tell them to go on diets and stuff...

My mom has never been into outer appearances (even though she's a beautiful lady)... and even now dresses very casually/humbly.

She says it's a wonder where I get my fashion tastes from, cause she has none!

Dad always said that looks didn't matter and that my inner strength and brains is what I need to be successful in life.

in asian cultures it is not taboo to talk openly about weight. my aunt can seriously tell if i gain one pound. every time i see my relatives, they will tell me whether i gained or lost weight. it was definitely a big focus in my family (not so much my parents), and culturally. i am the "fattest" one in my family. probably why i developed an eating disorder in high school!

Like Mrs. Bee, my family was always obsessed about my weight.

No. My mom wanted me to look put together (i.e. not wear pajamas to the grocery store), but she never emphasized that my value was based on my looks. My parents focused more on how smart we were, how hard we worked, how successful we were, etc. My mom never made comments about my weight because she didn't think it was important, which I really appreciated, and she always told me I was beautiful. However, being submersed in American culture, it was hard not to think that as a woman, my value was based on my looks or my weight - it is reinforced in magazines, media, etc. I think it is so hard to be a woman sometimes.

My mom is/was really into looks. We'd have EPIC fights because she'd force me to wear skirts to church and to school dances, when everyone else was wearing jeans. Once my youth pastor even pulled me aside and asked me to stop wearing skirts to church and church events because it was stumbling for boys. I was so angry because I didn't even want to wear the stupid skirts.

I was also chastized for being fat. Sigh.... when I think about my size back then (probably like 5'3", 120 lbs, size 4) it hurts my heart! My mom used to slap my butt in front of all of her (and my) friends at church and ask me why I was so fat.

ETA: I never developed an eating disorder. Instead, I rebelled in the same way I rebelled with schoolwork-- I let myself get fatter and slacked off in schoolwork because I knew if I got skinnier or got all As, my mom would see it as her own success, not mine.

@Mrs. Bee: @mrs. wagon: It's so sad that the older Korean generation is like this! My parents didn't tell me I was fat but sometimes my dad would comment about a friend after she left and say I needed to watch what i ate or I would end up fat like my friend. I hated it so much. I threaten my dad that I will not let him spend time with LO if he ever says anything to her about her weight...even in a joking manner...he knows I am serious

Very, very little. The priorities in my family were 1. Are you happy? 2. Are you content/comfortable? 3. Are you doing what you love?

Nope. I didn't care about fashion or looks mostly because my family wasn't big into it. My Mom wore make-up, yes but we weren't big into worrying about how we looked as long as we were clean and in clean clothes.

Yes, absolutely. I grew up in a family with 8 female cousins within a 10 year age range so it was like a fashion/weight contest every time we got together for holidays. No wonder almost all of us developed major eating disorders and/or had problems with depression!

I refuse to go to my extended family's trip to the beach every summer because despite my protests, multiple pictures are taken of all of us in bikinis and the elders always comment on our weight openly. I get a ton of flack for not attending, but I totally prefer being ostrasized and talked about behind my back to the critisizm over my body.