Hellobee Boards

Can you give him alternate words to use when he's upset? And talk about it when he's not upset, that saying "go away" hurts your feelings, and when we're upset, we can say "I'm upset! I want to be alone right now".

My LO often tells me to go away though...I don't really let it bother me! As for the No, I think that's par for the course with a toddler!

@beloved: it sounds like he's getting the reaction he's looking for, so I would just try ignoring it as much as possible!

Can you teach him a more polite alternative? Instead of "move!" we taught LO to say, "excuse me." And instead of "Go away!" he says, "I need a little space, please." No! could become no, thank you. And then praise him and try to grant his wish when he uses the polite version. Not sure if it would work in this case but an idea!

I do a pleasant but dismissive "nope" and otherwise ignore when LO says something we don't like and give effusive attention when he uses what he knows are acceptable alternates. It's been effective. Tonight my husband was giving a lot of stern attention to some unpleasant phrases and whaddya know he started using them more and more! Daddy ignored and poof they stopped like magic.

I would just ignore it and use positive reinforcement when he does something you do like. My 2.5 yr old says "go away mommy" all the time and I HATE it. Whenever she says it I look at her and say in a sorrowful voice, "that's not very nice to say that" and then just move on.

@beloved: This is a pretty normal phase for this age. Kids are learning that they are individuals and can have different opinions and wants from mom and dad, so saying "no" and other negative phases are their way of asserting their own independence and really just trying something out.

We don't really punish Xander (also 2.5) for expressing his emotions. We just ignore things we don't like, like tantrums or yelling no. When he's being rude, we'll tell him the correct behavior like "No, thank you" when he says "no" or whatever, but that's basically it. And then when he's sweet and polite, we praise praise praise!