Hellobee Boards

They annoy me because to me it's all personal preference. Just you wait until he's crawling all over! Maybe I am really looking forward to that? Just because one person feels someway, doesn't mean it's the rule on how everyone should feel!

They don't bother me unless its the same person giving me one after another like I'm a total idiot. In the situation you described, that wouldn't bother me!

They annoy me because they're often wrong.

I wondered if I would feel differently after becoming a parent but you know what? This isn't rocket science. It's hard because it's unyielding and there are not always obvious answers. Trial and error is a very tedious problem-solving method.

I guess I expected it to be even more intense than I could possibly have imagined, but it's actually about what I expected. So the "just you wait" people wind up sounding dumb to me because I assume they were unprepared at the time!

People really like to assume that their experience was universal, it most of the time that is not true.

I mostly get annoyed at the "just you wait" comments that are like dire warnings of how awful my life is going to be after this LO is born. Yes, it's very hard, and I realize I have just no idea how hard it will be until I'm in the thick of it. But I don't find the warnings of how miserable I'm going to be any help at all.

Sometimes I think these warnings are more a reflection of the speaker's personal issues than anything else. I really appreciate the folks who are able to realistically express the challenges of raising a child without making it sounds as though they regret having children in the first place!

It irritates me a little. I have a coworker who does this ALL THE TIME whenever anyone in our office is going to have a big life event - i.e., having a baby, getting married, etc. This week we had a little party for someone who is getting married soon - and the coworker told the person "just you wait till you get married! I had a really hard time thinking of something nice to write in your card!" ... because she (the horrible coworker) has gone through a nasty divorce. And she's always saying stuff like that to people who have kids (oh, just you wait till they get older, just you wait till the baby's born, you have no idea how hard it's going to be...).

I don't know, I find the way that she does it (for EVERYTHING) really rude and a downer on the person's excitement. Of course some of these things will be hard, everyone knows that. But you don't have to rain on their parade of a new exciting stage in their life.

I think most people who say "just you wait" comments are not as bad about it as my coworker, though.

On Mother's Day, two people told us we should take a related LO for the weekend before we think of having kids. Oh yeah - because once we find out kids are work-we will change our minds. They don't even know we've been trying. Grrrr!

@Mrs. Coral: haha my brother was telling me I Gould make sure and get all our traveling done before having kids bc it would e so much harder once we do (he and his wife got pregnant a lot faster than expected and have postponed their honeymoon by a few years). Little did he know I was six weeks pregnant at the time.

It depends on the context. "Just you wait" is usually prefaced by something negative -- "just you wait until they're walking!" as if it's unexpected and horrible.

But I did mention to my mom that I wondered what it would be like having two kids. How can my heart possibly get any bigger? How do I balance both kids needs? And my mom said, "just you wait. You'll see. Your heart swells!"

I think it's annoying because they're mostly untrue! When it comes to lo I try to roll with it and enjoy each stage. People who say 'just you wait' are focused on the negative and trying to (not so) subtly bring you down.

@Mrs. Jump Rope: Yes, this is similar to what I was going to say!

Unfortunately, it seems generally the just you waits that I get are like the ones you mentioned, OP - but they do really annoy me! All stages of parenting have their difficult moments, and I hate that so many moms do the 'just you wait' to tell you all the awful things about the next stage, it's totally unbalanced.

It did bother me the most when I was super pregnant though. I cannot tell you how many times I had people tell me to save up my sleep now (which obviously is not possible and not funny at all when you hear it 10 times a day), then when I told them I already wasn't sleeping got the 'just you wait if you think it's hard now!' Towards the end I kind of told of a few people off for this, my response became, "Just wait for what? When I'm waking up to hold, feed, comfort, and snuggle my baby? Why on earth would that be worse than waking up constantly with heartburn, vomiting, lots of aches and pains, and no baby to hold?" That usually shut them up, and occasionally they would backpedal a bit and admit that I had a point!

@FoodNerd81: OMG!! That thought has often crossed my mind...like what would they say if they knew we were in the TWW or what if we WERE several weeks pregnant?! Ack! I hope I never slip up and say that to someone else.

They usually bother me.

@MrsTiz: you just described me! I can't wait!

@Applesandbananas: I'm getting the same thing with crawling! "Just you wait, you think you want but he'll be into everything and you'll hate it and blah blah blah." Well, he's been crawling for several weeks now, and I continue to be super excited to see him progressing and being so proud of himself for being able to chase after his toys and get where he wants to go. Yes, it requires attention and re-directing on my part, but it beats the heck out of watching him be SO frustrated like he has been the last several months when he wanted to crawl but just couldn't figure it out.

It depends on why they're doing it- sometimes, people (with one kid, mind you) would warn me that we wouldn't be able to go out and do things at all. Guess what? We did. When we would go out, people would say, "Oh, just wait until they're walking, you won't be able to go out with them anymore." Guess what? We are. If they are said with condescension or are implying that I'm an idiot and I don't know what I'm doing- those make me mad. The well intentioned ones? No biggie.

@Dandelion: Same here. If I take just the baby I get all kinds of "you don't know what you're in for", or "is she walking yet? Well enjoy it now, cause you'll never sit down again" type comments. I look at them and smile, then tell them I also have a 12 year old and a 2.5 year old, they stop!

I hate hate them! I feel like they are untrue (or are only reflective of the speaker's experience) and are mean - like for the purpose of scaring the person in the moment. How is that a good piece of conversation? All the "just you wait" people when I was pregnant are now, since I have become a mom and am having a great time, are now saying "just you wait until she's a teenager". Just, like, can it, people and let me live in the moment.

I'm 17 weeks pregnant and get the Just You Waits about how horrible I will feel in a couple of months. Have painful varicose veins? Just you wait until you're 9 months and all your veins in your legs are popping out! Already having bad sciatica? Just you wait until you're much bigger and you'll be in a whole lot more pain! Or just the plain "It gets worse". Thanks bitches. Like I didn't already know that.

Last night I told mil that lo fights going to sleep, and she said just wait... Ergh yes I know children often fight sleep, but my 6 week old only slept in 1 hr stretches the night before, then she's older and purposefully fighting it, it'll be annoying at bedtime but eventually there will be sleep!

They don't bother me. Actually, I catch myself saying it sometimes But I usually note how annoying it is to say it, so at least I hope that makes it less so, lol. And I try to say it for positive things, like just you wait until they're walking bc it's so much fun or whatever...

I don't get annoyed, either they're right (in which case I learn something), or they're wrong (in which case I get to be smug, haha!)

Luckily I haven't heard those kinds of comments that much, so maybe they'd be more annoying if I did.