We both wanted two kids, if possible. Bee is one of two kids, so there was that; I had more kids in my family but for some reason, two kids felt right.
Did you and your SO agree on your ideal family size?
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We both wanted three. But then, when we found out we would have difficulty conceiving - and the costs involved - hubby has switched his tune to two. Breaks my heart, because I still feel like three is in my bones. Just another way infertility is a killer.
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No. I want to be done, he wants two.
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Yes! But neither of us is dead set on a specific number. We always said we wanted 2-4. Now that we have 2, we know that our family is not complete. I guess we will have 1 more, see where that takes us, and then potentially have another. But 4 is our absolute max.
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DH says two, I say three. We have a 7 month old now, so we'll see if either of us change our tune when we have our second in a year or two.
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Yep. Initially, we wanted 2 - 4. He is one child of 2 and I am one child of 3. But over the years, we had more exposure to some large families who are very happy and...I'm not sure of the right word...functional, I guess? I was always afraid that if you had a bunch of kids, the mom would have a nervous breakdown or force responsibility onto the older kids to look after the youngers or the parents would just be driven insane by the amount of noise and chaos. I'm not saying none of things happen to big families (or small ones!), but seeing these large families interact in an up close and personal way made us realize that we could have a large family without those issues.
So now we want six. I'm pretty sure we'll be the only homeschooling family with a ton of kids we know who are also atheists.
Don't get me wrong, I'm still scared that I won't have the patience, will power or wherewithal to handle that many kids...but at the same time, I'm excited to watch our family grow.
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We agree on 2 for definite, I'm wanting 3 though so we'll see how number 2 goes (if we get a 2nd)
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I wanted 2-3, and DH wanted 2. We're happily two and through.
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DH wants 4, I'm kind of leaning toward 3 but I wouldn't rule the 4th out if our family didn't feel complete.
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In the end we agreed but when we met I wanted 3 and he was indifferent. He already had 2 kids so he was fine with none or 2.
We compromised at 2.
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Yes...we've always said 2-3. We have twins and are about 90% sure we're done. We'll give it a lil time to make sure then close up shop.
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Pretty much! We both were one of two growing up. We said that we'd like "two, but at most three."
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Yes. We both always wanted two. We grew up in families of two kids, so that's just what we're both used to and what we wanted for our own family.
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Not really. Before LO we wanted 3-4. Now I can't imagine more than 2-3. DH would be happy with as many as I can give him, but my max is 3.
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Yes!
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Neither of us know if we want another yet. He is more in the one and done camp then I am.
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i always wanted three as i was one of two and found it lonely. he was one of three and insisted three was too much and was dead set on two. now that i'm pregnant (and miserable) i think i might be okay with being one and done but i think he's still insistent on two. we'll see how one goes... if we do have a second we'll go for a 3-4 year age gap probably!
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Yes. We both know we're done with pregnancies, but if our finances work out, we're both open to the idea of adoption. But, we'll be ok, if that doesn't work out.
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No, my husband would have four if possible. He definitely wants two. If we have two boys first he will want to try for a girl. If we have two girls he wants to stop because he doesn't want three girls I just want one child.
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Yes, we're very much in sync. We're very happy with two, but not totally closed to the idea of more. (but very very close to being closed to it!)
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Yes.
Pre-kids, I wanted 2-3 and DH was pretty set on the idea of 3. I came from a family of 2, and he from a family of 3. Now we're both 99.99% sure we're two and through.
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We will respect the others wishes. Right now we are expecting our first, I am open to 1-3 kids. We are just seeing how it goes.
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We agreed on four before marriage. After #1 we both knew we wanted more immediately. I'm pregnant with #2 and we are still on board with four. If I were younger and real estate not so expensive in this city, I think we'd consider more.
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He's fine with one. I am leaning towards a second. Outcome is TBD.
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DH wanted 4 and I wanted 3. We have 2 and both want a 3rd. In an ideal world with unlimited money he would still want 4 but reality has set in and he's good with 3. We'll see if we have the 3rd.
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Before we got married we agreed on two possibly three. But the three boys shot our numbers up really quick. After our daughter I thought I still had room in my heart to adopt again but my husband thinks I am completely off my rocker!
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I wanted 4 and he wasn't sure he wanted any. We compromised by agreeing to 2. Now that we have had 1, we are both convinced that 2 is the perfect number for us.
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Yeah, we agree on 2. I think he's open to more than where as I really want to keep it at 2.
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We both want 2 but we are open to the possibility of a third.
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No, I'm would like to be done at 2, and he would like 3. I think I will win
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I'd like 4, DH would like 3. Now that having kids has been a difficult journey and taking more time than I had thought, I may be content with 3. I'll see how I feel if we even get to that point.
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Originally I wanted 3 and he wanted 2 so the plan was have two with an option for a third. He suffered PPD after our son was born and wanted to be one and done which didn't work for me. Luckily after some time and falling head over heels with fatherhood we both agreed to TTC for number two which I am now pregnant with. The option for a third seems entirely off the table for him which I won't push but if he changes his mind I'd be open to it.
@Tidybee:
Hugs
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Depends on what day you ask. Lol. We both waver between 1 and 2.
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We do agree now, but we haven't always. I don't think that is an indicator of any sort that our marriage is in trouble (not that anyone has written that, but it's a general feeling I get).
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DH wanted 0 and I wanted 2. We're TTC for #2 now.
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I don't even agree with myself! Lol we are majorly waffling at this point after being previously staunchly one and done...
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We both want somewhere between 2 and 3.
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Nope. Sweetie wants 4. I want 1 or 2, and I don't want to commit to a #2 until I've actually experienced parenting. Sweetie is pretty resigned to the idea that we won't have more than two unless a twin pregnancy is involved; I'm 32 and he's 38. There's also only so many times I can be pregnant without it seriously derailing my career.
Don't get me wrong, I'm still scared that I won't have the patience, will power or wherewithal to handle that many kids...but at the same time, I'm excited to watch our family grow.
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37 comments