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we really try to! we don't ever name call and avoid generalizations. DH has also learned his turning point where he needs to leave before he blows up, it used to hurt and make me feel abandoned with our issues, but i've learned that he's not leaving to hurt me but to protect us from his temper and then can come back and talk like an adult.

We fight fair, but to be perfectly honest our fights are really more like slight disagreements. We maintain eye contact, and often will touch in some way- hand on knee or hold hands. When I hear myself raising my voice I take a moment to compose myself. Early on in our relationship DH cursed and I would table the conversation. He didn't like things to linger unsettled, so now he expresses himself in a nicer manner. Eventhough DH thinks it silly after years of therapy on and off I express my displeasure as "I feel X, when you do why Y" and he will use the technique sometimes too. One thing that certainly helps us when we argue is that we both want to find a reasonable solution. Yes we validate each other's opinions and feelings, but our goal is to make each other happy again.

We don't argue, I tend to get pissed off and need my own space for a while to get over it. DH has learned that I'll come to him to talk when I'm ready. DH is pretty easy going and don't think anything (so far!) gets him annoyed enough to start an argument.