I ran into my old coworker's pregnant wife(8 months) the other day at the grocery store. She told me his new business venture wasn't going great and business was still slow. She said he had asked her to go back to work since their two kids are in school, age 8 and 6. She says she looked for a bit then decided to get pregnant again to avoid working. I just nodded like it was the most normal thing for someone to say!
Do you know people who have more kids to avoid working?
hostess / wonderful apple seed / 16729 posts
What?!? So her DH's business is slow and he asked her to go back to work (probably for financial reasons) and now she wants to get pregnant so she doesn't have to go back to work. Wow! Just wow!
Ok, trying not to judge. Maybe they have a lot in savings and she doesn't need to go back to work. Or maybe she has no idea how their finances are and just wants to get pregnant.
wonderful cherry / 21504 posts
Um... that sounds unusual.
I do joke about it sometimes, like after a bad day at work, I'll think or jokingly say to my husband, I just want to get pregnant and be a stay at home mom. Works sucks. But in reality, I'm aware that being at home with a newborn is a lot more work than I'm doing at my job!
grape / 86 posts
She sounds cuckoo to me! I worked while pregnant though. My shifts ranged from 8-16 hrs a day and I was on my feet most of the time. I also went back to work 7 weeks pp.
I guess when I hear things like this I just don't understand the thought process. Maybe I'm missing something though and should try not to be so judgemental.
bananas / 9118 posts
Me. Well not really, but...
Wow. I think that is a scary reason to bring a child into the world, but I won't lie- it was a huge perk to having a baby for me!
I was working 50-60 hour weeks teaching, and was happy to have that stop when the baby arrived. I still work 15-20 hours a week to help out our household, because I like my job on a smaller scale, and to give my husband some daddy time. I think we are all much happier for it- along with gaining the most amazing little boy.
hostess / wonderful apple seed / 16729 posts
@lemondrop: yeah, I, too, admit that I want to get pregnant so I can get 3 months of maternity leave and time off from work. But I plan to go back to work. It's definitely not my main reason but it is something I am looking forward to.
bananas / 9628 posts
When I was in college, the classroom teacher I worked with was always taking about how her husband was a lawyer & made plenty of money for them to live off of, but he wouldn't let her stay home until they had a kid. She didn't really like babies but she couldn't wait be knocked up so she didn't have to come to work anymore & was really hoping he'd let her hire a nanny once they had a baby so she didn't have to spend all day with it. She also complained that she chose teaching because she thought she'd have more time off than she did. She was a TERRIBLE person, I'm hoping it was a phase she grew out of or that she was having a hard time TTC and said those things not really meaning them but just in an odd detached coping was too overwhelming kind of way.
persimmon / 1202 posts
That's weird to me. Though I do know of women who've gotten pregnant to get out of the military (Paying $200+ for one 24 hr shift's babysitting without getting any extra pay, up to twice a month, and having to take care of an infant while recovering from that, on top of normal babysitting and not being stationed anywhere near family or with their husbands, which means they are supporting two households...) But a normal job seems like less work than a newborn to me. So weird.
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
She has always been a little nuts and her husband frequently complained about her spending habits. Their 6 year old daughter is stunning and has been doing modeling for years...maybe they have that saved?!
GOLD / wonderful coffee bean / 18478 posts
I have several friends who said that they hate their jobs so they just want to quit and have babies ... so that is what they did. It's not exactly the same but it is kinda?
hostess / papaya / 10540 posts
That's just sad for the child. I hope she's not spending her child's money with that shopping habit of hers.
blogger / pomegranate / 3300 posts
I used to tease my sister about it because she hasn't ever had a job. She finished her masters degree right when she had her first baby 10 years ago. When her second son was five she got pregnant again but it wasn't really to avoid work we just teased her. I can't believe someone would say that and mean it.
grapefruit / 4120 posts
Sounds like they have a great marriage partnership!
This to me is the same as people who want a caesarean because it's "the easy way out." THERE IS NO EASY WAY OUT, PEOPLE! In the same way, whether you go back to work outside the home or stay home or whatever, once you have a child there's no way to "avoid working."
At the same time, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't looking forward to my maternity leave! Most especially the six weeks BEFORE the baby is born (STAY IN THERE UNTIL YOUR DUE DATE, BABY.)
GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22646 posts
W T F.
Not that same situation, but dh's best friend's wife had three kids over the last 5 years and while they've made it work with her being a stay at home wife, I partially think that she may use the excuse of "trying for the girl" (they have 3 boys), to push off going back to work a lil while longer.
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
@sloaneandpuffy: Seriously. I don't know them well enough to know if she was joking! I sent him a text...Hey I ran into your wife and heard you guys are expecting, congrats, etc. He responded that baby 3 was a surprise but of course they are excited. He also mentioned they have to cut back financially and he is switching his kids to public schools this fall.
pear / 1837 posts
So, I think this is weird if it wasn't a joint decision. If she said to her husband "I'd rather have more kids and stay home with them" and he said "ok cool" then that's one thing... but I think it's pretty inconsiderate that all the money-making burden is on him, he asked her to help out because he was presumably worried about their finances, and she essentially said "Nope."
GOLD / wonderful olive / 19030 posts
Wow, sounds like a horrible time to get pregnant financially! I have heard of this, and it makes me a little queazy, it is such a big decision. I don't know seems a little dishonest to me!
blogger / watermelon / 14218 posts
haha. that's so ridiculous. I never enjoyed working until I had a baby... now I lOVE work. Haha.
There's a girl who Wagon Sr. knows (who I really don't like, she's just one of those girls who has no tact and rubs people the wrong way) who once posted on Facebook "Work is so stressful, I'm starting to think I should just get pregnant so I can quit and relax." This was when I had a newborn and was sleeping 1.5 hours at a time. Haha.
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