Hellobee Boards

No, I can't imagine a place where we support my parents, but I know my mom and dad supported his parents for quite a few years. It was tough on everybody, especially when I got older and was aware, I'd get a cheque from my Grandma on my birthday and want to just sign it back over to my dad knowing that it was really his money in the frist place.

No, they give us money! LOL. Actually, both my parents and my DH's mom are helping us with a large down payment on a new home. We'll pay them back once our condo sells but in the meantime we need their help because we don't have that kind of cash at the moment. Otherwise, we are lucky to be financially comfortable and so are our parents.

Soon we will but hopefully not on an on-going basis. One of my parents cars just died (it was a 1996, so yeah) and they absolutely cannot afford to even buy a used car right now, so in the next few weeks we will be buying them a new (used) car. If anything happens to my dad and he can’t work anymore, we will definitely have to financially support my mother. Its not something I am looking forward to if I’m being honest, but thems the breaks.

not on a regular basis, but we help out from time to time. i'm happy to do it and want to make a lot more money, specifically so we can help our parents and extended family.

We help out my MIL from time to time. She really doesn't have a lot saved since she was a SAHM and then they got a divorce. So situations like those make me nervous about ever becoming a SAHM.

With the downturn of the economy a couple years ago weve been helping my parents with the mortgage and household expenses for a couple years otherwise they would've lost the house my then and that was just not an option for us. We also pay for anything my brothers need for school because I don't want my parents to stress over it. My dad works, but business is not booming as it was 5 years ago. When we were planning our wedding my dad was heartbroken that he couldn't help us pay for the wedding like he had always hoped. The way I see it he worked his butt off for 40+ years to take care of us 4 kids and put us through college, it's the least we could do. I've also had to loan my uncle money for rent before, I honestly didn't want to do it but I knew that if I didn't help him he would go to my dad which would make my dad stress because he can't help his little brother. I'm very lucky DH is on the same page as me with my family finances.

no, but we've given them money. and i'm thinking of giving them some money when they officially retire, although they need money now.

we haven't started giving his parents, but his dad may lose his job in march, so we'll give him what he was earning....

Someties we have helped out my MIL and FIL. Then DH's sibling have help sometimes too. Never on my side of the family though. But I would if they needed it

When I was in a relationship with the guy before my husband, he basically supported his mother. It was a source of lots of arguments for us because she saw it as her right to be taken care of. She had a lot of health/mental issues, so it wasn't like she could just go and find some employment.

Having said that, this was something my husband and I discussed, because partners need to be on the same page about how to care for aging parents. If it comes to either set of our parents needing money, we've agreed that they'll sell their current homes and come live with us. I really feel strangely about giving them money directly, I don't know why, though.

@looch: I'm totally with you on being uncomfortable just giving someone money. For two reasons. First of all, it's more economically sound to live together and provide for one larger household then to try to support two separate households. Also, I think people are more willing to try to find solutions on their own if they would have to make some changes in order to get your help. My parents are certainly not like this but I think sometimes when there is a family member who is a drain on others, they have no motivation to change their situation if others just hand them money to keep on living the life they're accoustomed to.

No - like others, our parents (well, DH's parents) still help us out by paying DH's car insurance (he's still on their policy), and a few times they have given us cash when things were tight. DH's parents are very well off and will both collect 6 figure pensions, so we won't need to help them.

My parents, though, are not as well off. I have been thinking about how we could help them without being patronizing, or creating a situation where they would depend on it or feel indebted. They have shared their struggles, but they keep the details very close to the chest. I wouldn't want to meddle, but I do want to help as soon as we have the means!