Ours do because we've always had a spare room for guests. It does cause a fair amount of stress, though. It got me thinking that I might rather stay in a hotel when I am a grandparent. I think our parents would be insulted if we asked them to stay in a hotel (and we would never ask). But I wouldn't be insulted if my kids wanted me in a hotel. I think I would totally understand that this could be the less stressful option if you can afford it.
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Yes, ugh. We have so many extra bedrooms, it doesn't make sense for them to stay in a hotel, at least not from a my-sanity standpoint
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My parents are local but my inlaws are not, they stay with us. There are hotels in town, but not near our house, so they would also need a rental car or we'd have to pick them up, so it would be a lot of extra work either way.
When my inlays visted, my fil caulked our pool, did all the yard work and touched up some interior paint. My mil cooked and did the ironing. They're awesome to have around.
If space were an issue, then maybe they could stay at a hotel.
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With us, they come from so far away that the stay is generally longer. We have also lived in several expensive cities, so it's not like they can just find a cheap hotel.
When it is time for us to start visiting our adult children, I think we will be very open to staying in hotels if the situation warrants it. I have definitely felt imposed upon, especially by the inlaws, so I wouldn't want to put my kids in the same situation.
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They did before LO arrived. After, we just don't have the room for them. DH got a major guilt trip from MIL about not letting them camp out in our two bedroom condo with a newborn. She later stayed during maternity leave and caused a host of problems.
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@looch: sounds like you have awesome parents and in-laws who are always super helpful!
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@Andrea: I am blessed, for sure. Next time my inlaws are in town, I'll send them to you for a few days. I feel obligated to share my good fortune, lol!
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My mom stays with us when she visits but she also makes us dinner and helps clean while she's here. And we stay with her when we visit her.
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yeah i might feel differently if mine were helpful
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@looch: haha ok, deal!!!
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My mom never comes to visit, but when my dad and Stepmom do, they stay in a hotel because we don't have room. We used to offer an air mattress but he laughed at us
my ILs are not welcome to stay with us because they are heavy smokers...before LO was born they stayed with us once and it took a week to air out my house!
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@Bookish: They smoked in your house??
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Both sets of parents aren't local, so this isn't an issue. We don't have room for anyone to stay, anyways.
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We have a guest room and our parents stay here. Although, for Thanksgiving we paid fora hotel for MIL and her kids since my dad was using our guest room.
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Yep, we have a nice guest bedroom so they have ever since we moved to our current home. They don't stress me out though. They generally only stay for 1-2 nights.
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@Dandelion: we told them to only smoke on the patio, but I'm fairly certain they opened the windows in my bedroom and smoked. I was SO mad, especially since it was our bedroom, not a guest one!
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@Bookish: whoa, were they sleeping in your room or just went in there to smoke?
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No way do they stay with me. My mum is so mean she wouldn't stay with me. I let them have my entire home one time and stayed elsewhere and she complained the whole time how it wasn't good enough and then got a hotel. Nightmare!
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Yes, our parents stay with us when they visit and we stay with them when we go visit. We have room and they ways help out. Even if they didn't do much I'd still want them to stay with us.
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My parents live about 2 hours away, so they sometimes stay for a night if the have come to town for something late in the day. I think it's great, my mom is super helpful and we enjoy having company.
DH's family doesn't travel, so they've never been to visit us, but if they ever do they will certainly stay with us. When we go visit them, there are a ton of people and we all share rooms. It made me a little uncomfortable at first, and they usually gave us our own room, but it's completely normal in their culture, and I got used to it.
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@Andrea: we very nicely (stupidly?) gave them our room to sleep in. I had to wash everything, leave the windows open for days... It was horrible. Never again!!!
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@Bookish: @Greentea: whoa.
Our families (parents and siblings) stay with us when they visit. We also always stay with them when we visit, so I think it evens out.
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@Bookish: That's crazy. I don't know why smokers think they're so sneaky, lol.
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Our house in the states have extra rooms and it just made sense for any family visiting to stay with us, especially when they just want to see our kids (and not us!). It does cause a lot of stress and I have to constantly remind myself that it's for the kids and that it's temporary. However, that doesn't mean I don't get stressed out and get snippy at the hubs from time-to-time, especially when they stay a week or more.
Now that we are in Asia, my parents have a place nearby when they visit but they still come by to see the kids often, almost every-other-day if they can swing it. If my in-laws come we'll just have to squish into this place somehow! It would be ridiculous to ask them to stay at a hotel when they will be coming from half way around the world. Hopefully they don't all come at the same time (there's 7 of them!).
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My parents don't since we have other family in town with better accommodations, but my in-laws do. It's definitely not ideal since we have a tiny apartment and they're VERY high maintenance guests. (Like, knock on your door at 11pm to inquire as to whether you have a 40 watt lightbulb because the 60's in the lamp in my bedroom are too bright for pre-sleep reading)
It's definitely not ideal as we have a tiny apartment and not really a lot of storage for extra bedding etc. so we have to give them our room and one of us gets the couch and one gets the floor with no blankets or pillows now that the baby took over our office where we used to have a futon.
We asked them to get a hotel and offered to pay for it when they planned to visit when LO was born and they gave us so much guilt about how it was an attempt to prevent them from spending time with their grand kid that we just suck it up and let them stay here.
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Sometimes. If its just my mom she does and even sleeps on the couch (we don't have a guest bedroom). She would rather be with us and its never a problem. She always wants to take DD when she first wakes up and let's me sleep
But, she is planning on coming for 10 days when new baby is born and she is getting an airbnb rental
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My mom lives out of state, so when she comes, she stays in our nursery/guest room and baby will move into our room. However, her dad also lives in our town and has 2 extra bedrooms, so she may end up finding herself over there more than she likes if it gets to be too much for us.
ILs live only an hour away, but never come to visit. If they ever do come over, they'll likely stay at my grandpa's home, since they only travel with their dogs and our apartment (and we) don't allow them in. I don't foresee that happening, though.
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@Sapphiresun: um, did they expect that you will be sleeping on the couch after you give birth?!
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@Sapphiresun: wow, that's pretty brazen.
My ILs are coming over New Year's, and they will be. We have a small apartment, but my MIL and SIL are very flexible and will be on the floor. When my parents and/or siblings come, they usually have to get a hotel, but I don't like that they have to. I'd rather have them here! After the baby is born, I suspect my mom will come by herself for a while, and then she'll stay with us. I know she'll want to help.
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My parents and in laws stay with us when they visit. We're actually staying with my in laws out of state this week and my parents are staying in our empty house. They're visiting my brother & SIL for Christmas. We're happy to let them camp out at our place so everyone has more space.
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Luckily both sets are local, btu my mom will stay the night if we need a babysitter at night, she hates driving at night and will just sleep in the guest room.
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They stay with us, since we have a guest room. Once we have another child, I am guessing that my parents will still stay with us with more creative accommodation solutions (us on pull out couch? them on pullout? full bed in nursery if we decide to just make that work?), but not sure what my IL's will be up for (but they visit far less often, so less of a big deal.
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