It really gets to me when I see people who complain that they are living pay check to pay check and don't have savings spending money on non-essential items like an iPhone, new clothes, or lots of eating out. I would obviously never comment on something like that since it's their money to do what they want with, but it's just a mentality that I can not seem to understand. My husband and I have also seen lots of our friends purchase homes that are a serious stretch for them financially and if they ever had an emergency come up they would have no cash to cover it and would probably quickly be under water on their homes. Again, we would never say anything to them... but it's a very scary thing to someone like me who likes to save save save!
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Yes, especially when it is very close friends or family members and it negatively impacts me personally (like my parents).
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It bugs me when they complain about it while out to dinner in a fancy restaurant, holding their brand new smartphone, in their beautifully manicured hand...
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Yep! Totally bugs me!
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I think it bothers me more when I see people like that get constantly bailed out by their parents. For example, I have a friend who had her down payment for her house handed to her by her inlaws, but then talks about how financially strapped they always are and how lucky DH and I are for making so much money.
Just bothers me since we work for everything we have and it seems as if she's telling me about her parents or her in laws handing them things left and right.
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Yes, it annoys me to no end!
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@2PeasinaPod: DH is really bothered by people like this. But the ones we know are really shady about it. Like, everyone knows their parents pay their mortgage every month, but yet they live really, really comfortably (more comfortably than we do - bigger, nicer house, bigger, nicer car) pretend like they do it all on their own, but don't actually make enough to enjoy a lifestyle like if it was just the two of them trying to make ends meet.
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This drives me insane! MIL is the worst offender. She refuses to work and has demanded that DH give her a living stipend of $50k a year. And yet she drives a new Lexus, has expensive cable package, goes on exotic vacations, and is a member at three country clubs. We don't do any of that and both work to afford what we do have. UGH!
sorry for the rant!
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Not really. Not my money..... not my problem.
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@oliviaoblivia: Uh, say what? A "living stipend"?!
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This is annoys me so much!!! Who are you fooling you know? While we don't know exactly how much you make, but based on your occupation and what you have, it's clear to see you're living beyond your means! Congratulations on being flashy and envied by everyone because you have the newest or biggest car, house, diamond, watch, etc. but you're in debt over your eyes by thousands and thousands...
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@oliviaoblivia: shut up!!! are you freakin serious?! what in the world...
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@highwire: Yeah....needless to say we didn't give her the money.
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Yes and no... I am one of those people strapped for cash, but for my sanity it's nice to have a few nice things every so often, and most of the time they are "investments". Like, I have spent soo much $$ on crappy phones that always break, so I finally bit the bullet and sprung for an iPhone. but it is honestly saving $ for me because the plan is the same as what I was paying before and now I'll have a phone that will actually last me longer than a year. I also intentionally save for nice items, like putting $50 aside a month for a big ticket item makes me appreciate the purchase more. So this month I had finally saved enough for a few big ticket items and it looks to some like I'm loaded, but in reality I've been saving for a year for these things!!
However, it does bother me in some instances. Like the girl I knew living with her parents, who complained when I asked her to pay $30 for the bridesmaids shoes in my wedding.
But in general you never really know their situation and I have no right to judge.
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It bothers me to see people living a lifestyle that they really can't afford - spending all their money on leisure, meanwhile their parents are paying for their house, their cars, their bills, their credit cards, and eventually their children's expenses.
ETA: And then when they preach to us about why would we put anything down on a home because their philosophy is to put nothing down and keep their cash...why am I surprised?
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Yup! I have/had a friend who recently went into foreosure on a mortgage that was so freaking low. It just kills me; how irresponsible can you be to lose a home that's only like $700/month including taxes!! (neither she or her husband lost their jobs, they just stopped paying their bills). Then she tells me how she just bought all new appliances for their new rental. Burns me up a little inside because everyone else pays for the decisions like that that others make.
It also bugs me when people rely on their parents for money on a regular basis or have their parents paying some of their bills or supplementing their income on a regular, like monthly, basis. It doesn't matter if the parents can afford it or want to help; if you accept money from your parents on a regular basis, you're doing "living as an adult" wrong.
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@highwire: That's crazy! At least be upfront about it!
The most recent thing was DH redoing our half bath. He's very handy and did it himself, but it still cost us a good amount of money since we wanted higher end stuff. She came over and saw it, and complained about how they didn't have any money to redo their half bath.
I guess she was complaining to her parents b/c suddenly, their half bath is gutted and she was with her parents picking out tile and bathroom fixtures that they paid for.
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Yes, I have a cousin who takes advantage of his dad who just went through a divorce and also a best friend who complains about being broke (including not being able to get me a gift at my baby shower) but then brags about staying in a hotel and going gambling with her husband the next week. She spends her money friviously instead of on the improtant stuff or saving.
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Yes and no, I guess it all depends on the situation. I like to think of myself as smart with my money, but once in a while I'll make a purchase that is slightly outside of our means (i.e. the $800 DSLR I HAD to have for vacation when really my cybershot would have been fine.) We don't have a lot of extra $$ but we treat ourselves to big ticket items every once in a while when I've put some money aside for them, so I try to assume maybe that's what other people do too? I think what bothers the most are the people who complain about having no money and then go out and buy something expensive, brag about it, then a week later start complaining again.
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I wish it didn't but it does. Just when it's somebody that is always complaining that they can't pay bills or that they can't pay for dinner so you pay for them... then they show up with a new outfit or whatever. That's extreme but I did have a friend once like that. She was on food stamps yet was always buying new fancy stuff for herself. It was so bizarre.
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Yes. I know that it's none of my business but it drives me crazy. We budget very tightly and live within our means. I have a friend who makes much much less than we do, is always complaining to her husband about how it's not fair that we have a house and she doesn't, how they have to have a house, etc. But then she goes out and gets a new iphone, new flat screen TV, etc. I just want to tell her that it is fair because we make sacrifices to have the things that we feel are priorities (like our house) instead of spending money on the other things.
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Oh, absolutely! It is SO annoying!
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When I read the post title, I thought you meant people who pay full price for things you can get for cheap! Haha!
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Yep, bugs the heck out of me. My DH and I live pretty frugally, we just bought a house and can cover our bills + mortgage just fine, plus putting some away for savings, but we don't have a huge amount left over for fun stuff. We are somehow the most fiscally responsible people in our group of friends, and it really blows our minds how bad people can be with money! Like buying frivolous things with a credit card because you couldn't wait til pay day in three flippin days. Our friends tell us how envious they are of our house but really, if they just SAVED their money, they could have one too!!
Although, I have to admit that my other friend, who has their mortgage paid for by their in-laws, bug me even MORE when they try to give me financial advice or complain about having no money. UM, WHAT?
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I couldn't care less what other spend their money on, as long as they aren't bumming stuff off of me.
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I don't really have any friends who live like this, so it doesn't bother me. I do have some people I've lent money to who do this, and that does bother me. It's my own fault though.
I think a lot of people are very spoiled materially. I'm just grateful that my parents raised me not to care about most things. We all have our Achilles heels though: I buy a whole lot of books (all non-fiction and related to work, but it still adds up).
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Only when they complain about how little money they have! If someone wants to live outside of their means, fine, but don't tell me how broke you are when you put such a value on "stuff."
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Yes, it bothers me! The ones who are the most irresponsible also seem to be the most vocal about their money problems.
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It only bothers me a lot if they are related to me and if they ask if they can borrow money!
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@oahujeni: I'm with you. I see no problem splurging on a big ticket item after you have paid all your bills. My real problem is with the people who complain about their money woes so much and then buy frivolous items!
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doesn't bother me unless it's someone that's always complaining about being broke, asking to borrow money/spot them for lunch, etc. or bailing on our plans because they can't afford it. I don't care how you spend your money but I don't want to hear whining, or you asking to borrow mine or ditching our plans last minute because of it.
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It doesn't really "bother" me just annoys me. I have a coworker who is a single mother with one child, is on welfare & doesn't get much from her baby daddy cause he has 13 other kids. Needless to say she complains all the time about how she has no money and can't work more then 28hrs a week cause she will lose her welfare & childcare. Yet she is out drinking A LOT (poor kid), smokes, gets her nails & hair done, has the latest phone. IMO buck up or shut up.
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We have given money to a certain family member twice, our mistake, but she is always spending her money on dumb things. She lives with her elderly parents but gets her nails/toes done and does "fun" things all the freaking time. Grow up! We are half her age and we never spend money when we don't have it.
We buy nice things once in awhile and have an okay savings but most of the time we are very frugal. I don't like the, "I deserve it" mentality.
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I get annoyed, but try not to think about it ... their life, not mine (but it's hard not to feel irritated when it's right in front of your face).
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It doesn't bother me, but I wouldn't ever lend or give them money. We all get to choose how we spend our money
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@oliviaoblivia: we pay a "living stipend" to mil too. She drives a much nicer car than I do
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@travelingbrit: Oh that is not cool! DH's mom has begged for money many a time but when I know she is going out and getting wasted 3 or 4 nights a week, I just can't. She is over 50, she should know how to budget by now,,,
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Nope. It's not my money so I don't care.
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It only bothers me when I have to listen to them complain about it. And that goes for anything, like the friend of mine who is living with her in inlaws again, by choice, even though they drove her craaaaaaaaazy.
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We are a little guilty of this. We definitely splurge on things we don't need - going out to eat, the occasional mani-pedi, etc. We would be in a much better place financially if we stuck to our budget better! I know some do much better than we do, and some are A LOT worse, but I try not to judge because I know we are less than perfect. At the same time, I definitely don't complain about money to anyone - except maybe anonymously on the Internet! I know DH & I are incredibly fortunate to have such secure jobs at our age, and I don't ever want to seem ungrateful by telling people we are "broke," even when we feel like it!
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