I have gained over 50 lbs since I've seen my grad school friends. I've been through a lot. I got off my meds which caused me to gain weight, got pregnant, miscarried, got pregnant again, and gained lots of weight with LO. All throughout this I couldn't exercise because it's a big migraine trigger for me. In less then a month I will see everybody and I'm embarrassed and terrified. At least I'll have LO so hopefully they'll pay more attention to her then me.....
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All I can say is, life happens. The people that matter would never hold that against you. And I guarantee that some of your grad school friends will also be looking different from the last time you saw them.
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Aw don't be embarrassed. You've been through a lot... most importantly... two pregnancies! Don't worry about them judging you, if they are your friends they'll just be happy to see you, no matter what you look like!
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Aw, I'm sure that you're probably more aware of it than any of your grad friends are... and if there are any that judge, those ppl suck and don't matter!
But, I do understand your self-awareness of it. My 10 year hs reunion is scheduled for thanksgiving week... right around our due date; so needless to say I'll mostly be giving birth or just home with a newborn.... and won't make it...
But even if I haven't given birth, there is no way that I'll be going.
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Thanks girls! Honestly, I admit to judging people when they gain a ton of weight, so I guess I just expect others to do the same. Never thought I'd be in this boat!
@highwire: Yes... they're thinner! One girl just posted a bikini picture and she looks amazing! And of course the reunion is on the beach... my fault because I wanted people to come to me.
@mrsjyw: LO was 2 weeks old when we had our reunion, no way was I going either! Not only because I didn't want to leave her, but I didn't want people to ask me how far along I was.
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I wouldn't worry about, although I know it's easier said than done! Buy yourself a new outfit to help you feel good & get your hair cut beforehand you will feel like a million bucks
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Don't worry about the stupid skinny bitches, they don't deserve your worry. Just go, have fun, enjoy seeing the people that you are going to see and have fun introducing your LO around. I know it's hard but if you just think of the reasons why you are going, it should help you get through it.
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@MediaGirl: "skinny bitches" need love too.
@ArtBee: I have a hard time imagining that your friends will remember anything other than what an amazing journey you have been on, what you have accomplished and overcome, and how lucky they are to have you as a friend.
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@jessiejo17: I sooooo need a haircut. But I'm trying to wait until I have enough to donate
@mediagirl: Lol, I was one of those skinny girls not too long ago! I actually had more people tell me stupid things then about my body than I do now. It's not nice to tell a fat girl she's fat, but apparently it's ok to tell someone they're too skinny. It was pretty awful for me because I was on a med for my migraines that caused me to drop a ton of weight, and there wasn't anything I could do about it.
@MsLipGloss: They actually don't know about the miscarriage, they just know about my LO.
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I would not worry about it at all.. everyone knows you're a mom and HELLO, you have been through so much in the past few years.
I get a little embarrassed when I see people from college since most of the girls are even skinnier than they were in college, going out every weekend and totally living the sex and the city kind of life. I've got cubicle ass and mommy tummy and my clothes are so MOM. But then I have to remember that I have a wonderful husband and a beautiful son, and a lot of those girls who look so glamorous are still looking for just that. I just skipped the (very expensive) part of life where you're a young hot chick.
And besides, I have plenty of years to get hot again after this LO is born!!!
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@mrs. wagon: So true, it does help me to think about how I'm the only one with a LO, so I'm really the lucky one!
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I think it's pretty common for people to gain weight as they get older, so you definitely won't be alone. In fact, the only FB friends I have who are mothers and actually post current pictures of themselves are the ones who were able to lose the baby weight completely and i can count those friends on one hand. Otherwise, it's only pictures of the baby I see.
I don't even have kids and I've gotten bigger since college (I can't say 'gained weight' since I've actually lost weight, but I have a higher fat content so I am "bigger"). It just happens - I work full time now so there is less time to work out which makes for a much larger posterior
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@artbee: this is one of the reasons I will never go to a reunion. I worry about what other people think and I hate thinking people are talking behind my back. Whether too skinny, too fat, haven't changed at all, it seems like there are always people who will find a reason to talk about you. I just stay away from situations like that in general.
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@Modern Daisy: These girls aren't moms so they're still posting pictures of themselves, and they're all still thin. But you're sooooo right, I only post pics of my LO now, and it's because I don't like pictures of myself anymore.
@mediagirl: That's part of the reason I didn't go to my HS reunion, but these girls were my good friends and I'd love to see them and catch up. I don't want my stupid body to get in the way of that.
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You know what, I wouldn't worry about it. some people gain weight and don't even have a baby to show for it!
I gained 50+ lbs since highschool too but that wouldn't stop me from going (if I had a reunion)
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I think you look great! Treat yourself to a new outfit, make-up, hair cut, etc for the reunion and knock 'em dead!
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I don't think it matters what you look like when you go to a reunion. There are going to be some people there that are totally catty and will make comments under their breath no matter how you look, but who cares?
I know people tend to want to look their best, but nowadays, with all the social media we have to keep in touch, we often already know what to expect wrt to how people look. It's not like the days when there was no facebook and literally people hadn't seen each other in a long amount of time.
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Don't worry about it! I think what is the most attractive thing is when a person owns their body, no matter what size. So get a cute outfit, and own it!
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I know how you feel. I've gained 50 lbs. since I got married two years ago, and I get very embarrassed when I see people I haven't seen in a while, too. And I don't even have "baby weight" as an excuse! I don't have any great advice for you, but I want you to know I understand how it feels. However, I have never for a second felt judged or anything by anyone. People pay attention that type of stuff a lot less than you think they do.
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