Hellobee Boards

Definitely. I want to get out of work ASAP on a daily basis. I hate staying late or working extra. I did choose this career based on flexibility in the future, but I just don't have that right now as i pay down my loans.

I also realize that I want to go back to school and specialize, but it's way harder now with kids. Thats a huge one for me.

Oh for sure. I just don't have the time to work the way I did before. I have to say, it has also made me more motivated, so it has been a positive impact as well.

Absolutely. I used to be so focused on my career. Now I do a good job, but I don't put nearly the same effort into it that I used to. Family comes first

I work in an office with all guys, and I think NOT having children has definitely solidified my place there.

I do feel like there is a double standard when I look company wide.
I get the impression that the men that do participate a lot in the childcare responsibilities (like having to leave to pick up the kids from daycare) are congratulated or kind of favored with the sentiment like "Wow, these dads are so great taking on some the responsibilities of childcare." But I don't get that same feeling for women. It's more like "I'll guess we'll have to postpone the rest of the meeting because Mary has to pick up her kids."
It's subtle, but it's definitely there.

Starting a family allowed me to give myself a reason to quit my job at the time and become a SAHM. I was unhappy, and it wasn't an ideal job for me out of college. I wish I had more time to figure out a career path for myself. Instead I feel like I gave up, and I don't know how to get back in the work force when the time comes.

Yin I'm in the same boat. I love staying home and it gave me a reason to leave my job that I hated. But I spent years working so hard to get my PhD and people think I'm strange for doing nothing with it now. I guess it might be good to work part time but don't even know where to start really.

Nope, not at all. The year I had Xander, I got promoted. And while on this maternity leave, I just got a 10% raise. If anything, having kids has helped me! Most of my bosses have children, so it has given me something to bond with them about. And my immediate boss has submitted me for more opportunities because he purposely has wanted to include someone with children in certain things to ensure that perspective is included.

Not on paper, but ramping back after maternity leave was HARD. I felt like I was treading water for several months.

I got a promotion after maternity leave and I survived layoffs but I feel like I'm not doing as good of a job. I am really feeling that way now that I'm pregnant with #2.

I'm somewhat lucky that my male coworker had a baby at that same time as me (and his wife is expecting again) and his output has slowed as much or more than mine and he sticks to the same hours I do. I think that kind of tempers expectations.

I do feel that I work more efficiently now and my BS/time waste detector is super good.

Haven't started a family yet, so my career has progressed but not by choice. I mean ever year, I'm not pregnant I'm growing and learning new things at my job. Not completely different from not TTC because I do have a lot of fertility related appointments that takes away from focus I could put towards work. So I would say just regular chronic stress & pressure from TTC for a long time. But probably not how my career would be affected if I had a LO right now.

Not necessarily. I had a job, but not a career, before having LO1. I ended up quitting to SAH and was able to turn that into freelance WAH for something that is much more interesting and enriching for me. That said, we also moved abroad just after Lo1 turned 1, and in our current location it would be difficult for me to find an office job because of the language barrier. So WAH has actually been the best possible solution for our current situation.

It has definitely affected it, but I'm not sure how yet. I go back to work after my maternity leave on Monday starting a brand new job, same field but much more of an administrative/leadership position. I loved my last job, but it required being on call literally all the time and came with some inherent physical dangers. When this new opportunity came up, the fact that I was pregnant inspired me to fight harder to get this new job that would allow me to have a much better work/life balance. That being said,this new job is a giant step forward career wise, so I'm hoping that it ends up being positive for both my family and my career.

Yes, definitely. I worked my behind off before DS was born because I knew I was going to need a big favor from my boss afterwards. I asked her to let me work from home for a couple of months when my three-month leave was up. A few others have done that (mostly because of medical issues, a couple of people because they moved out of state), but it's frowned on in my office unless you have a Really Good Reason. I was working as hard as before, got some insanely difficult stuff done, and never dropped any balls... but I think it looked to a lot of people like I was slacking off.

I did end up taking on more responsibility partly because of the pregnancy (I was in office more managing things, because I couldn't do as many field assignments), and partly just because I was ready. This was great, but I still had to work so hard to erase the perception that I'm a slacker, and I almost left the job because I felt my effort wasn't valued. It's true though, that I just can't put in the hours I used to, unless DS is nice and goes to bed on time so I can work evenings from home.

I guess I could have made a different choice and just showed up in the office when DS was three months, and kept it up with the overtme and stuff. But that's just not what I live for, so I'd rather deal with the hit to my career.

I chose to leave my job because of childcare limitations, but when I was ready to get back to work, I didn't find it to be a problem.

Yes and no. Yes because the company I worked for when I was pregnant and when LO was an infant was high stress and not family-friendly (my direct manager told me that working mothers are the reason that the US is in the mess it’s in today, and other lovely sentiments, on a regular basis once I announced I was pregnant). I was definitely mommy-tracked as soon as LO was born; it was day and night the way I was treated prior to and after pregnancy.

However, having left that company, I have definitely not been mommy-tracked at the company I’m at now, which is a very family-friendly company in general. The team I’m on, almost everyone has kids, and it’s an all-female team and they are very supportive of a work/life balance.

I’m also lucky to have a partner who doesn’t put his career over mine: when LO is sick, it’s not the default that I have to take the day off, or that I have to leave work. That helps a lot. I also haven’t mommy-tracked myself because I continue to move forward, seeking out new assignments/opportunities for movement up the ladder. So, in the end, I don’t feel that having kids has really affected my career.

Absolutely not. My company is family friendly and I was even hired while pregnant. Family comes first is the expectation.