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Before I was pregnant we did talk about this a bit. I think even without kids in the picture I would want my husband to re-marry if I passed away at an early age. I wouldn't want my husband to be lonely and unhappy for the rest of his life just for the sake of protecting my memory. I would certainly hope we could both love again. There is no one in the world I'd rather be with than my husband, but I'm not a believer in soul mates. I believe my husband and I are very well suited to each other but I also believe we work hard to maintain a happy, loving, supportive marriage. I hope we would both be able to find that with someone else if tragedy happened.

i would love to have my mom help me, but i don't think i'd want to move back to california. so i'd probably stay in ny, but i'd get a live-in nanny!

who knows though... it'd prolly still be too hard though so i may end up moving back!

Yes there have been a few deaths in our circles recently, two of them involving the breadwinner of a family with young children, so we have definitely be talking about this more now and we have been looking into life insurance so that our child wont be destitute if one or both of us isnt here for her

Yeah, I think we pretty much know what would happen. If we both die, my sister gets custody and my parents would take an early retirement to move up here and help her... they'd do the same if I passed away, to help DH with LO. If DH passed away, I'd move in with my parents, either in my current town or back in my hometown. We both have life insurance and some other money set aside for emergencies, so we're in decent shape planning-wise. We're also lucky to have LOTS of family members who would want to step in and help us (both with LO and in general) if anything happened.

We're not pregnant yet, but even just to cover the 2 of us and so that we know each other's wishes, we have talked about it. We just completed/signed our living wills. We're looking into life insurance. At the moment, we each have our own alternate POA, but once we have children I think it would be important to have the same person named for both of us. We have kind of talked about who would be guardian to our chlidren, but we haven't made any final decisions.

It is an extremely important conversation to have, and the more prepared you are the better. I am a social worker in a hospital, and I have seen too many times families that are unprepared and have to deal with trying to decide what their loved one would want and who should make the decision. Do yourselves and everyone who loves you a big favor and complete all the paperwork!

We have. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't remarry. You hear so many horror stories about steP fathers abusing children.. I don't think I could ever trust a man to love my babies like they were his flesh and blood. You just never know.. And I'm not willing to take that risk.
Dh says he wont remarry (once is enough for him he says). Haha. I told him that if he finds a woman who can love and care for our kids, he has my blessing to remarry. Knowing him though I'm pretty sure he won't.
I asked that he send the kids to visit with my family a couple time a year and told him I'd do the same for his fam.

It makes us both so sad to think about it that we don't talk about it. We have made plans for it - extra life insurance, a will, etc but we do not talk about it. For some reason we can talk about us both dying but not just one of us. Either way, both are taken care of. I can't even continue to think about this, it makes me too sad.