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Our pediatrician told us to keep him awake as much as possible during the day, especially at that age. This way he has no choice but to sleep more at night. If he's sleeping better for other people maybe they are calmer and he senses this? We also were good about sensing when he was capable of doing a longer stretch and having mini CIO sessions to get him to drop a wakeup.

@Meridian: Are you breastfeeding? I think that some babies just like to be really close to mama. E did basically all the same things, but he mellowed out little by little until we were able to start him out in the co-sleeper at night, and by 2 am, he'd end up in bed with us. And just after 6 months, we put him in his crib on a whim and he has been sleeping through the night since!

I don't think we did anything magical or "right", I think it all depends on the kid and we got insanely lucky. And I thought he'd never sleep until that magic 6 month mark. And he's only ever taken one nap a day, which didn't start until he was 10 or 11 months old. Not perfect, but it works for us.

Honestly we sleep trained our son super early because he literally didn't sleep more than 8 hours at most a day. He was screaming the rest of the time and chronically overtired and after spending days holding him in a recliner I couldn't handle it anymore. We did everything you did and had his reflux meds switched twice, tried supplementing with 4-5 different formulas, and I'm still on a super bland diet. We felt that since he was crying all the time anyway, CIO wasn't going to be all that different and perhaps he would get some more rest. After about a week, he started taking 1.5-2 hour naps during the day and started sleeping longer stretches at night and now he's pretty good unless he has a Wonder Week going on or something (leap 8 was 8 days of nonstop screaming hell). I will say that your theory about being relaxed really was true for us. The days I'm extremely tense and upset at him he will not sleep, but when I'm patient and loving and calm he is more apt to sleep.

Your baby is so, SO young still. Sleep training isn't advised before 12 weeks, and some would say 6 months. I know that's not what you're doing, but it's just hard to count on a baby to have a solid sleep schedule or routine before a certain age.

You aren't doing any sleep sins, btw. You're just trying what you can to see what works for you. That's amazing!!

For us, we held her for every nap (that's a freaking sin, haha), and rocked her down to sleep every night. We'd then transfer her to her bassinet after she was asleep. I wore her ALLLL the time from birth to 12 weeks. At that age, she just wanted to be held.

We bottle fed, too, and around 12 weeks, it became our bedtime ritual (which we had to change once she was about 6 months). 12 weeks was the magic spot for sleep. It's all very relative, but I feel like if you just comfort and snuggle baby now, in a very short time, baby will start developing a bit more of a consistent schedule.

Once we got his reflux meds figured out and switched to EP-ing, we started nap training with 10 mins CIO at like 6 weeks. We didn't really have to CIO at night - once naps got settled he naturally started to be ready for bed in the evenings and would wake about every 3-4 hours to eat in MOTN. He's 14 weeks now and goes to bed at 730pm, has a dreamfeed at 10-ish and wakes up at 730am. He takes 3-4 naps a day. I've realized that our son actually has high sleep needs When in the beginning we thought he had low needs because he never slept but he was always crying and never ever happy. Now hes a happy baby as long as he has his rest and so we guard his sleep schedule really closely, which annoys relatives to no end but when they see what a banshee he turns into they quickly change their tune.

The first 3-4 months are total survival mode. I truly believe you literally cannot create bad habits that early - he's still learning how to live in the "real world"! We didn't even think about sleep training or making good habits until J was at least five months old and he's a total rock star sleeper now at 11 months!

In my mind there's only what you do and what you don't do. No rules. I think you are doing wonderfully if everyone is able to get enough sleep and stay sane. That alone is a huge accomplishment in the early days! Nothing is ever set in stone, either, so if you decide to change how you are doing things later on, you can do that. You'll find the right path for your family.

I have a 3 week old and we are just surviving for now too - we cosleep, nurse to sleep, let her nap/sleep on us, etc! I'm hoping to start introducing better habits starting from maybe 4-6 weeks...

I agree with Littlejoy: what you're doing isn't "sinful", you're just attending to your baby! Your baby might find it easier to sleep on his own when someone else puts him down because he's not having to separate from the person he loves best (you!). Things that once helped my 12-week-old to sleep like rocking, swaddling & white noise no longer work as well, so I'd say some babies develop in such a way that means certain techniques no longer cut it as far as getting to sleep is concerned. Don't worry, you're not going to end up with a 5-year-old who'll only sleep in a swing!!! As babies mature, so does their ability, and inclination, to sleep.

I'm of the opinion that you can't spoil babies. They're driven by a sense of necessity rather thsn desire. And they aren't like owning a dog that you can condition to act in a way that suits you (rather than suiting them)... they're constantly evolving as people, so what worked yyesterday won't necessarily work today.

Hang in there. I agree with survival mode, but you can still try new things!

Have you tried having daddy put him to bed, with you not being in the room? DD HATES going to sleep for me, even at 11 months. IDK what I do wrong... lol!

Also, you say you rock him to sleep - do you ever just put him in bed awake? Let him get comfortable with his surroundings?

Maybe watch over MIL's shoulder as she gets him to sleep.