Hellobee Boards

I don't like registry requests included in invitations. But maybe I'm old-fashioned!

We had a Honeyfund registry along with our BBB registry so people could also get us a gift if they weren't comfortable with the honeymoon thing. We didn't put it in our invitation, though - we had a link to our wedding website, which had a tab for registries.

@JoJoGirl: hahaha, i could have posted the same answer. we had a honeyfund, one at BBB, and one at amazon. people had options & the info was on our wedding website under the registry section, nothing about gifts was mentioned with the invitation.

@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: ours had info for each item and the real cost- so we had already paid for the cruise, but we put things on there like excursions we wanted to go on- drinks onboard, dinner at the fancy steakhouse on the ship, transportation from the airport to the ship, massages, and photos from the ship photogs. i had it linked to a paypal account and people picked out what they wanted to gift and they could transfer the money online or print out what they wanted to gift and put it in a card with a paper check or cash. then i used the money to pay for the items they gifted. it was awesome & i love that everyone made our honeymoon so special- those memories will last so much longer than a blender & they were things we might not have done had we been paying ourselves. we did have other registries for people who wanted to give boxed gifts and plenty of other people gave cash.

I've gotten used to registries with invites - I've actually grown to appreciate them. A friend of mine used Honeyfund and I may have been the one that tipped her off to it. From my understanding, they get no cut and the couple gets the entirety of the money. I like how they can designate funds (even though it's basically just adding a name).

I think I helped get her an over-water bungalow and a romantic dinner. But both items were set to unlimited, so it's just everyone pitching in. I like that my gift was put to use

I have no problem with a honeymoon registry, I have a problem with it being in the invitation.

I would rather give them cash that they can then use towards their honeymoon, because I don't know which honeymoon registries take a cut and I'd rather the couple get the full amount I want to give them. I'd put a note in the card saying I hope they can use it on their honeymoon or something like that.

But putting it in the fancy, formal attire, invitation is just tacky to me. I'd do the same thing I would have (give cash with a note) but would side eye them.

We had a Honeyfund registry but didn't put it on our invites. We were able to do so much more on our honeymoon because of it (we went to Paris and London), and I prefer experiences over material things. We took pics at each place we went and included the pic of us in our thank you cards...so for example someone paid for us to go on a dinner cruise in Paris so we sent them a pic of us on the cruise. I think it worked out really well!

The idea of Honeyfund is great, since so many people have established a household on their own prior to getting married - many people don't need more stuff. I'd rather contribute to an experience than buy someone a duplicate toaster!

But a registry on a wedding invitation is always gauche in my book.

I have an issue with reference to gifts on the invite, but not necessarily the honeymoon site. I just feel like... it's not rocket science that people like cash, and the whole middle man thing about a honeymoon registry annoys me. Why can't I just write a cheque and say "dinner's on me!" in the card.

I was once invited to a very fancy destination wedding that we spent a considerable amount of money to attend and their invite said "donations accepted". I clarified that they meant "give us cash" which I thought was a little rude on a lot of levels...

I don't really care either way since we usually gift people cash or a gift card!

We didn't ask people to contribute to our honeymoon but many people gifted us cash as it is a pretty traditional Chinese custom.

I have no problem with it for reasons that a lot of people already have mentioned, especially already having established a household of stuff, single or married.

So, if you don't have a shower but you do have a wedding, where is the proper location for registry info ? Is there none? You can't assume everyone is Internet savvy, especially the older generation.

I've contributed to 2 similar honeymoon themed registries in the past, but neither were on the invite. The info/links were on the wedding website. I understood for both times though. 1 time, we were all so young, it was a way for them to have a nice honeymoon. The other time, the couple had been together for over a decade and they didn't need any house stuff. But paid for the wedding themselves and could use help with a honeymoon.

Just wanted to add - I was 33 when I got married and my husband was 37. We'd already lived together for 2 years in a relatively small apartment and had both been living on our own as adults for over 10 years... We really did NOT need anymore stuff. We registered for china and some appliances neither of us had, but honestly, as 'annoying' as most people find honeymoon registries, the idea was sort of a lifesaver for us

@looch: Exactly! I get not putting the registry in the invite, but that aside, different people have different needs. I also didn't have a shower or bachelorette party (just a luncheon for girlfriends the day before the wedding in lieu of both).

@JoJoGirl: @looch: Agreed! We had a Honeyfund and a Bed, Bath, and Beyond registry. We put the link to our wedding website in our invitations. We did the BBB registry only because people would have put up a stink if we didn't. We basically registered for, like, "ultimate wish list" things - stuff that we liked but wouldn't have bought for ourselves. We'd already been living together in a house that we'd bought together for 3 years. The honeymoon registry allowed us to schedule excursions and a limo to the resort - stuff we definitely would not have been able to do without the registry! When a hurricane interrupted our honeymoon and we weren't able to DO those excursions, we took the money and used it towards home improvement projects.