I think we started talking about it around the one year mark of our dating relationship. Our plan was to get married, wait a couple of years and have 2 kids.
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We started dating at 17, and at that point I didn't think I'd ever have kids. We were so young that we just didn't talk about it much. I think we started talking about it more seriously during the year before we got engaged (so at 23/24 years old), because he wanted to make sure that I was firmly in the kids camp before we got married. I'm glad we ended up on the same page, because he's a keeper
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In theory, or actually TTCing?
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We spoke about it in broad terms very early in our dating relationship (you know to make sure we were compatible in that area) and made a plan of action probably 6 months after getting married. Our discussions centered mainly around whether to pursue buying a home first or TTC, and we ended up TTC once we were settled in our house.
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Within a month I would guess - I was 28, he was 38 and had 2 kids already - kids were a must for me so I wanted to know if he wanted anymore - I was too old to waste my time dating someone who didn't want kids!
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@looch: I guess either?
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We talked about it pretty early on because he already had two children and having a child of my own was really important. So, if he was done having kids then I wasn't interested in dating him.
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@Mamaof2: lol jinx.
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@.twist.:
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We talked about how many kids we wanted before we were dating. At the time I was debating breaking up with my then boyfriend because he didn't want kids.
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We talked about kids early on within our first year of dating. We both wanted kids but it didn't really go beyond that while we were dating. During our engagement is when we started planning loosely family planning timelines then that changed a year after we got married and we decided to have kids a year or two sooner than what we originally said. No regrets!
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I think we probably talked about personal preferences around a year after we started dating, then actually planning together after we got engaged. Hard to remember!
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It was something I brought up after a couple months of dating, one of my previous boyfriends had a daughter at 17 and decided that was his only child, he informed me of this well into our relationship and I wasn't willing to give up being a mom and I was devastated, I didn't' want it to happen again. He wanted kids and even stated he didn't want to wait too long being 32 when we got married. We agreed wait a year after marriage and start trying. WE ended up bumping it up several months.
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We were 22 and 23 when we started dating and nowhere near ready, so we might have talked about it theoretically but neither of us was thinking of it then (dh didn't even say "I love you" for most of that first year we dated!) by the time we were engaged, 3 years later we knew we both wanted kids. We didn't start making concrete ttc plans though until we'd been married like 2 years
Eta I was 30 when lo was born, so 8 years after we met -
oh gosh, I don't even remember! But we both knew while were were engaged that we weren't going to wait long after marriage to try (since we were 32 when we got married) and we got KUd after we'd been married 2 months.
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Um... I think it was about 3 days into our dating relationship. He told me loved me and told him I wanted to have his babies. lol We move fast.
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We started dating as teenagers, but I'm sure that we discussed our life plans pretty early.
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We started dating at 16/17, but we were pretty serious by the time we were in college, so I'm sure we discussed our future relatively early on. When we got engaged, we had a timeline for when we wanted to start TTC.
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I think we confirmed that we both wanted children sometime during our dating relationship. We started seriously talking about TTC when I had a milestone birthday coming up.
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I honestly don't remember when we discussed this first! I remember some conversations early in iur marriage but I'm sure we talked about it earlier...I do know that we were always on the same page though.
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We talked about wanting a family in a general sense from when we started dating. But we didn't talk kids until we were ready to start trying... I think 3 years into our marriage. I was scared of kids!!!
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About 14 months after getting married.. and then we were pregnant 2 weeks later lol
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Within a couple of months of dating. I don't see the point in wasting time with someone if you disagree on fundamental things like that.
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We discussed future kids openly not long after we were dating. Not seriously of course but I know it came up in conversation a few times that we both wanted kids.
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We discussed our (ever evolving) ideas about the possibility of kids pretty much from the start of dating. But it was always a "long ways in the future" thing. We didn't seriously discuss possibly having a kid until about 1.5 years after we were married, and at that point we discussed possibly starting to try in another 2 years.
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@Snowdrop: yup!
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we discussed wanting kids and what number like about date 3? I was looking for a serious relationship and I also did not want to get attached to anyone who didn't want kids because having them for me was a non-negotiable. We decided that we would start trying as soon as we were married about a month after we were engaged.
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We started dating at 17 & 18. I don't remember a specific conversation but I'm sure I at least made sure he wasn't anti-kids in the early days. We didn't start talking about timing for kids until 8 years later or so (still prior to marriage) and then started TTc at 29 & 30.
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Pretty early on I think. Having kids was important to me, so I discussed it early with anyone I was serious with.
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Even as friends, I've always known he wanted kids. At the time, I was sure I didn't want kids of my own. I was always open for adoption. But in my year teaching abroad, I realized I wanted to have kids afterall. This was also when we started our relationship.
In my visa application to move here, I talked about how we wanted children one day, because that was the one thing we knew, even if we never talked about marriage (and back then I wasn't even sure if I ever wanted to get married again). Marriage isn't a requirement to move here.
It's also the reason why we chose to live here and why we'll stay here - it's very family (kid) friendly country.
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When we were dating in college, I was really unsure if I wanted kids. I wasn't sure if I would be a good mom. I was afraid that we would raise them up to the best of our knowledge and something that we couldn't control could happen to them ( like drugs... I've seen good friends go through this and I don't think it was anything the parents did.) It wasn't until I graduated from college that the now DH brought up that he wants kids and he couldn't be with someone who didn't want kids. I slowly started opening up to the idea of it. Then we got engaged and started talking more about it and decided DH could SAH and I think that made me feel better about it. I know DH would be a great dad. So then we got married and as you guys know... We are trying desperately to get pregnant while have IF.
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We talked about hypothetical kids pretty early on when we were dating. By the time we were engaged, we had a general plan for when we would have them. We started narrowing own our plans seriously around our 1 year wedding anniversary. We got pregnant 4 months after our anniversary.
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nonchalant conversations from ME about 4 years in, no serious conversation from him until well after we were married. About 9 years in.
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On the 5th date or something way super early.
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I'm sure we talked about having kids very early on and as our relationship progressed and we got married we got more & more into the details.
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