Hellobee Boards

Hm. I am the same way as your husband. I am terrible with cute/sexy ideas that he would enjoy. I usually feel badly about it and its hard when he tells me what I can do or that I do t have to do anything because then it just doesn't feel genuine. I totally get it, I wish I had some advice but I'm still trying to figure it out myself!

@Bookworm: "Now, mind you, if he had said propane, I would have been all over it" LOL.. He was SO close

@pui: Blargh. Does he normally say he doesnt know what to do and do something less than stellar, something last minute or nothing at all? When DH pulls that on me "arghhh I dont know!" I tell him that if he put half of the time he spent looking at sports stats into researching an idea he wouldn't be stressed about it at all Half kidding of course. I know he just gets overwhelmed that it wont be grand enough or that I wont enjoy it which is crazy because I tear when he cuts my napkins into hearts for breakfast. <----- HUGE SAP

My husband is kind of similar- he does tons of thoughtful and nice things, but grand romantic gestures aren't really his thing. Usually he doesn't really worry about it though, and only notices if I get upset about it.
While I often wish that he could read my mind and come up with something often, I find that we are both happier if I give him some direction, like if I tell him "This year for Valentine's Day, could you look into restaurants and make us a reservation at a nice fun one that we wouldn't normally go to?" or "I could really use a new silver watch with a white dial and little to no other ornamentation, I'd love for you to pick one out for me as my present."
I've also had to work hard on being honest about my expectations for special occasions- I used to say things like "oh, it doesn't matter if we do anything" and then totally get upset if my birthday was really lame. He doesn't like to be told exactly what to do (like, he doesn't want a shopping list that he has to fill instead of me), but he appreciates being told "here is a general idea of something that would make me really happy if you did it."