Hellobee Boards

Any chance she's been watching Frozen a lot? I swear my son learned "I can't" from Elsa. He was saying it a ton but not as much since he got out of the Frozen phase.

I usually say "show me how you try" and that gets him to at least attempt it. Usually he completes the task and gets lots of praise.

@Bao: My started saying I cant around 3 years of age. And i basically tell her not to say that. I've told her she can do anything if she puts her mind to it. I always remind her to give her best try and maybe say "I think need some help with this" rather than "I cant"

What I do when this happens (and if it's something I know my kid knows how to do or could do), I guide him step by step orally without actually touching/helping him do it. For example, there's a (short) fireman pole at the playground and he really wants to do it, but he's not very brave. He will do it if I help him, but he's scared to do it alone. So I've stood there watching and told him "put your hand here", "put your leg here" and he does it and then feels so confident after and starts doing it on his own.

LO went through that phase. Just be patient. If anything....here's a suggestion...bit by bit, you could try reminding LO of specific things she couldn't do before and now can do. (Then let go of the conversation without any expectation. The underlying message here is CONFIDENCE.) The next time she says I can't, tell her a story of something you couldn't do and now you can. (Then drop it. The underlying message is I UNDERSTAND. YOU ARE NOT ALONE WITH THIS STRUGGLE.) The next time it happens, tell her how you wish you could turn her can't into a big giant CAN OF MARSHMALLOWS or CAN OF LAUGHTER or CAN OF WHATEVER SHE LIKES (Just make it silly, then drop it. The underlying message here is IT IS FUN, YOU SUPPORT HER AND DISSIPATES ANXIETY/FEAR OF DISAPPOINTMENT FROM YOU) Oh also, in a completely non-situation remind her that she CAN if she has the courage to give it a try.
....Before you know it, LO will come along. She probably just needs some space to grow and creative ways to support her.