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Awww i wish you nothing but the best. You are so right in everything you said. I know if it were me i would tell it like it is but thats ME. The main thing is is that he needed to know how you feel and if it is making you unhappy, then he needs to help you feel better. Thats pretty immature of your MIL to be taking advantage of you guys like that.
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It's definitely important that you have told him how you feel and how important these issues are to you. He can't continue pretending that everything is fine and ignore the situation. The problems won't be resolved over night, but at least you have started moving in the right direction to find solutions. Again, big hugs to you, it takes a lot of courage to stand up to your loved ones and tell them when something is wrong.
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I am so glad you were able to finally vent your feelings. It's so important to release the negativity for your own mental and emotional well being.
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Hugs! Sorry you are going through this. Am I reading correctly that your mil has lived with u your entire marriage? That is NOT healthy! Glad you told him she needs to go. I agree with the other ladies. He is disrespecting you and needs to put u in front of his mother. You are his other half. He needs to cut his chains (his mother). And he needs to grow up. He calls u a child? He's the one not talking to u for 2 weeks and then this morning. Hugs! I hope he snaps out of it soon and I hope it helps to talk to a therapist. But really, I think the main problem is on his end, not yours, so I really don't know how much a therapist can help, except to help lift off the weight off your shoulders.
Good luck!!
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Latest update: So it was almost a full 4 weeks of him not talking to me or acknowledging me. I tried again last night to talk to him, explaining to him several issues (including his mother) I had and doing my best not to get emotional. He came up to bed and apologized, as did I for mistakes I have made as well and we're both putting the last month of our lives behind us.
I still am going to find a therapist just so I have someone unbiased to talk to on my own.
All I know is I'm happy this BS is over with!!! We both have a lot of things we need to work on, as individuals and as a couple, so I will take it one day at a time.
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@babycanuck: Im glad you guys got past it, but I think you should find a way to have a calm conversation (maybe in public like at a restaurant) and explain that you still feel like you need her to move out so you both can work on issue you have.
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@T.H.O.U. I definitely brought that up last night. He kept saying "what's the rush?" and my response was that I want to be a newlywed, and that for me there's no light at the end of the tunnel. I'm hoping through the last few weeks he has a better understanding of how I feel.
His biggest beef, which makes no sense to me, is that when I'm upset I call my mother to talk. He doesn't want to hear it, and I need to get it off my chest, so what's wrong with talking to her?
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I'm also late to the game, but I understand him not wanting you to tell your mother everything. He probably doesn't want your mother to think poorly of him. DH and I have guardrails on what is acceptable to share with others, everything else stays internal. A therapist would be a good unbiased 3rd party.
Also sometimes when I'm really emotional about something I write it down. So then I can calmly go through what I wanted to talk about. Otherwise I'm just a hot mess and then feel like I never got to communicate what I was feeling.
And the last thing that someone told me once was to apply 2 filters....is it true? Is it helpful? Because I always thought well if it's true then I can say it. But sometimes the truth is just hurtful without being helpful.
Hope you guys can talk things out and your stress level decreases.
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