So I just got back from the market.
On my short walk there, I saw 3 kids who were definitely under 2 years old..
I was kinda shocked! My kids are in bed by 6:30 and 8:30!
edit: It was around 9:15pm when I saw them!
So I just got back from the market.
On my short walk there, I saw 3 kids who were definitely under 2 years old..
I was kinda shocked! My kids are in bed by 6:30 and 8:30!
edit: It was around 9:15pm when I saw them!
GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22276 posts
When I am out at a restaurant and it is 10:30/11pm and a kid is out, yes. If it's anything before 9pm I don't think much of it but personally my LO is in bed at 7pm and think it's odd when parents have their kids out so late.
coconut / 8279 posts
DS doesn't have a set bedtime, though he'll usually sleep by 9pm. He's been out with me past then.
Generally he goes to bed between 8:30 and 9pm and takes one 2-hour nap in the afternoon, but some days are completely different and he seems to go with the flow.
Strict sleep schedules never worked for us.
pomegranate / 3890 posts
i use to, until i had a night owl baby and had to go to the store late numerous times. to be fair it was when he was a newborn and he could fall asleep anywhere.
GOLD / wonderful grape / 20289 posts
Not usually.... I figure people have their reasons. I went to a dinner that started at 8 and there was a toddler eating at the next table. They just started their meal. I figured their LO just stays up later, I have a friend who's kid naturally just always stayed up late.
honeydew / 7488 posts
I saw a mom with two kids at CVS at 11 pm the other night.. One was probably 18 months and the other was probably three. They looked really tired and were in their pjs. I started to judge and then really tried not to. Who knows what was going on.. They were buying a ton of ice!
grapefruit / 4731 posts
Wow I didn't know people would judge me on this! We eat about once a week and it's a dinner late because we come home at about 8pm most days. The day we eat out we just hop in the car once the latest person comes home and we go and eat. Sometimes we are out till 10pm.
LO normaly sleeps around 9-10pm. But nights we eat out he might go to sleep at 11 or even midnight. He's kind of a night owl. Not sure if he actually is one or became one because of his parents.
grapefruit / 4110 posts
Yup, and I've done it myself. Traveling home and getting a restaurant very late. Or we took my niece to a late movie but she didn't wake up from nap until 6 pm so she was up. But I wonder what the deal is when I see them up. So maybe that isn't judging.
eggplant / 11824 posts
Nope; if we go out to dinner we bring LO and are almost always out past 9pm so I don't judge stuff like that. If LO is tired, she falls asleep; if not, she stays awake and just goes to bed when we get home.
squash / 13764 posts
Yup,, even though I know I shouldn't.... If I see kids out past 8 or so, I tend to judge...even if they don't go to bed til 8/9, I feel like they should be home winding down instead of running around the city.
pomegranate / 3204 posts
Haha I totally did this the other night! I went to Wal-Mart after I put LO down, it was around 9:30 and I saw so many babies and young children. I text DH and said I can't believe how many little kids are out this late!
ETA: I have also done this on special occasions where we were out and LO was up and I felt like people were judging me on how late it was!
eggplant / 11716 posts
Yup, I judge. But I usually only notice them in the first place if the kid seems fussy/cranky...so then I want to be like....well, if they were asleep like they should be, they wouldn't be so cranky.
hostess / papaya / 10540 posts
I used to. And then I had a kid. Sometimes things happen and now I think there's usually hopefully a good reason for it.
coconut / 8475 posts
Yup. And when I have LO out that late, I feel terrible and also feel like I'm being judged! I try to always avoid it. But, like @hilsy85: said: even if they aren't asleep, I like they should be in.
pineapple / 12793 posts
Only past 11. Dd was a bit of a night owl in the beginning so I generally figure people have kids like her.
pomegranate / 3329 posts
Only if it's later than 10, and it doesn't appear that they're out buying milk, formula, diapers, or medicine. I was a single Mom with C and sometimes a trip for those items are unavoidable.
Now C (11) likes to go to bed early at 8, and M (19 mo) won't go to sleep until 9:30-10.
blogger / eggplant / 11551 posts
nope, i just think, "wow... i can't believe their kids aren't melting down right now!" (more an observation, not a judgment) - i actually kind of admire their flexibility bc that's not me. i'm obsessed about bedtimes and i know i get judged for that too...
GOLD / pomelo / 5737 posts
9:15 is iffy. Once, about a week ago I had lo out til 8 which is her bedtime (730-8.) She went down at 830 that night. I saw other kids out too (at Target) but I wondered if they always do that or if it was an exception like me. By 9:30 or definitely 10pm I'm starting to wonder but I don't really judge. I mean, if that's what they do, that's up to them.
clementine / 943 posts
Nope. I don't know their situation. That family out for dinner at 9 pm? Maybe they just traveled to the East Coast from California, and so it's only 6 pm their time. That mom with the two little kids at CVS at 10 pm? Maybe she ran out of Tylenol/milk/diapers and she didn't have anyone to go to the store for her.
Seek first to understand...
bananas / 9973 posts
Not really if it's before 10 or 11. I know BFF's daughter is kind of a night owl like her parents. And I think our LO will have night owl tendencies too. As of right now, she still stays up till midnight a lot of nights, even when we start our bedtime routine at 9pm!
coconut / 8305 posts
Out to dinner, no... Grocery shopping, yes.
DH doesn't get off till 7 so if we go out to eat then we will likely be out till 9... Both kids are straight to bed when we get home though. Even if we aren't out of the house it's likely for the kids to be up that late just because our pushed back schedules. (I was actually a schedule nazi when G was little & he had a 7:30 bedtime until DH's schedule change)
When I see people at the grocery store with their kids (clearly grocery shopping) OR young school aged kids playing outside at that time, yup I totally judge.
pineapple / 12526 posts
Yeah, I have to admit that I do. After about 9pm, I kind of think kids should be home. Im really strict about sleep schedules and bedtimes in our house.
pear / 1609 posts
I used to before I had a kid. But my LO is a night owl. Mostly because I don't get home until 9 pm some nights so he goes to bed around 10. On nights I'm home we will keep him out late if we do dinner. But hardly ever passed 9 because he gets cranky.
pear / 1743 posts
Not on a regular basis, but I do judge parents who taking their children to really late showings of scary movies. I know that they might have some decent reasons but the kids get terrified and/or run riot, and movies are so expensive here I feel really gutted when it disturbs the viewing experience.
GOLD / wonderful coffee bean / 18478 posts
It depends on what they are doing. Maybe they are out for a walk bc the kids would not sleep. But if they are in a loud restaurant with a bar scene, then I do wonder what they are doing there.
bananas / 9227 posts
I used to. But after DD's sometimes crazy schedule, I don't anymore. Plus it's sunny until 10:30pm here during summer!
honeydew / 7589 posts
No not at all. There are so many reasons for kids to be out that late, like:
- It's an emergency run for diapers, toilet paper, medicine, etc.
- They are traveling and still in another time zone
- The family has an uncommon schedule and the child's normal bedtime isn't until very late anyway. Like maybe a parent works late so they adjust their schedule so that the kids can see them at night.
Our baby doesn't have a set bedtime, but we normally start the bedtime routine around 10-11PM. It works for us, and her.
We're night owls - I'd much rather have her up with us at night than have her up early in the morning when I'm not a happy camper. I'm a better Mommy at 10PM than at 6AM - so why not have her asleep when I'm grumpy?
honeydew / 7589 posts
It had never occurred to me before this thread that people might be judging me when they see me at the grocery store or a restaurant with LO at 9-10PM. Oh well.
grapefruit / 4120 posts
Not at all. We do it at times! I guess i don't understand people whose whole lives revolve around their kids' schedules. I mean, aren't exceptions ok once in awhile? That seems like a tough way to live!
wonderful pear / 26210 posts
I am not usually out and about after 7 pm, and if I am, it is not at restaurants and grocery stores anyway!
But, I do admit, I do judge, even though my rational mind knows all kinds of reasons exist...maybe I am jealous that their kids are so flexible, when mine isn't.
grapefruit / 4823 posts
depends on where they are. dinner/grocery shopping probably not. playing on the street at 9pm without a parent....yeah
nectarine / 2085 posts
Pre-child, sure, I'd judge. Babies and kids were supposed to be in bed by like 7, right? But now--heck no! I've got a night owl on my hands and we never sleep-trained, so LO (now 2.5) has only been asleep by 8 a handful of times. Ever. We often eat dinner around 7-8. His typical bedtime is between 9-9:30, but he's flexible. He gets plenty of sleep and is totally healthy. It just depends on the family.
grapefruit / 4923 posts
i'm usually jealous, like "why is their kid not melting down?" "how do they have the freedom to do that?"
cantaloupe / 6730 posts
Nah. I know quite a few small kids who go to bed at 9-10 PM (especially when they have a parent at home, so they can sleep in). I get judgey when I see 7-10 yo out playing past 9 on a school night though...
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