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@runsyellowlites: Oh yeah, Im totally going to use what happened the first time around against him next time to get to do whatever I want. lol
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@mrskc: I really think as more of the evidence becomes known that more & more moms are going to start planning homebirths! I know atleast here, birthing in the hospital scares the crap out of me! *shudders*
@evansjamie: That is SO awesome! I hope that it can get changed soon! We had a birthing center protested by our medical community too & they ran my last MW out of town when she was actually living here... along with the doctor that backed her! It's so sad!
@zippylef: I think that happens with alot of ftm &/or expectant dads! Because it's such an unknown world they opt for the hospital or hospital birthing center & then afterwards realize that maybe it wasn't the best option for them. I tell ftm all the time that there are alot of reasons for one to not choose home birth but fear b/c it's your first time isn't one of them!
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@ElbieKay: My doula definitely helped but in the end the OB had the power in the hospital. My midwife had privileges in the hospital, but the OB at the hospital has the final say. But it's great that your OB has a lower c-section rate.
@zippylef: Funny. My DH is like you, he wanted us to deliver in our living room and I said, no siree bob! I thought a birth center was the happy middle meeting point.
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@runsyellowlites: @mrsjazz: MO finally wised up and changed the laws enough to allow St Louis to open it's very first birth center last year. It's definitely an option now!
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@mrsjazz: We considered a home birth for about a day and a half but... what if we need emergency neonatal care????? I don't want to take my newborn to Hoboken Hospital!
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@ElbieKay: It's kind of "funny" b/c the birth portion of P's birth was fine (even though I transferred)... her stay after that was horrendeous & just had more & more not evidence based care & bullying. When we were finally discharged I swore the only way I'd ever return is if we needed transport by ambulance... might seem rash to some but I just can't stand having things like clean catch urines done to my newborn when her previous cultures already came back negative.
(it actually makes me cry still to think about it)Needless to say we have a really crappy medical community where I live & doctors that like to be more bullies than anything else. boo!
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My doula was trying to get some people together to do one in Asheville. I can't believe there wasn't already one organized there. If it gets worked out, I'll do my best to be there!
FWIW, I had a great experience in the hospital with my doula and family doc. Everyone was super supportive of my desire for a natural birthing process and I wasn't made to feel like I needed to hurry it up or anything. I feel really fortunate and would recommend Mission Hospital in an instant!
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@allison: That's awesome! We need more hospitals & conventional providers that are like that! I know out of hospital births aren't for everyone.... we just need real evidence based options & support for EVERYONE regardless of their birthing method!
I love that even some are starting to follow the evidence for more "gentle" cesareans & doing things like immediate sts, respecting the golden hour, etc!
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@runsyellowlites: Yes, definitely. And I'm pro-homebirth! It just wasn't in the cards for us this time around. I was initially really nervous about the hospital and was very pleasantly surprised by my experience.
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@allison: I think it's cool you went with a family doc too! From what I've found they tend to have better birth outcomes than most conventional obs.... wonder why there is such a difference.. hmm.
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@runsyellowlites: We chose her specifically because she was recommended by other mamas who desired a natural birthing process. I interviewed two other midwives before her and liked her way better. She was really *so* patient with me, it was amazing. I pushed for 4.5 hours and baby crowned for 45 minutes! I just know that a conventional OB would've at least used vacuum extraction or forceps, but she just let me power through it. Kind of crazy, when I look back on it.
Anyway, sorry to threadjack! Back to the Improving Birth rallies... Everyone should go!
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This thread gives me the heebie jeebies!! if I lived in the US I would so be going to one of these rallies! birth is just treated much differently here, and it makes me scared for when DH wants to move back home!
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@runsyellowlites: My hospital was actually really supportive of my wishes too. During labor I had a very hands off nurse who just stood off to the side most of the time and let my DH & doula take care of me. It was the dang on call OB that I'm still mad at. I technically didn't go completely med-free b/c he marches in all of 5 minutes before I deliver my son with a giant needle ready and gives me a saddle block. I remember him asking if I wanted a numbing shot. I thought it was just a local anesthetic... maybe in case I tear and need stitches after. I wasn't in the right mind set at that point. I feel like he totally took advantage of the situation. The shot was extremely painful & I literally pushed my son out like minutes after he gave it to me. So I don't know what the point was. My doula didn't even know what was happening. She felt really bad afterwards and wishes she would have asked me if I wanted him to stop. She then told me it happened AGAIN at another birth she attended just a couple weeks later. She said it happened so fast she didn't even realize it happened. I complained to my OB at my 6 week appointment and he mentioned that the OB had been giving a lot of saddle blocks lately. I'm still mad at that OB for giving me that shot! ok.. I'll end my rant that has nothing to do with the original topic.
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@allison: That is SO aweosme!!! And I don't mind the threadjacking at all! I think sharing stories of evidence based & non-evidence based care is totally the point of the thread.
@Penny Lane: I hope that getting the information out there will start changing things! I want a better birthing system for my daughter & future DsIL!
@mrskc: UGH!!! How is mom supposed to give INFORMED consent in a circumstance like that! I would be SO upset!!! And like I told @allison threadjack away! I love slightly off the topic conversation!
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@runsyellowlites: I would love to go to one!! This is my first baby and I haven't experienced any trauma, but I watched my sister have an unnecessarily rough labor and delivery.
But as we've discussed a couple of times, I haven't had any luck finding other options for birthing close to me other than a hospital birth in a hospital I'm not sure I'm comfortable with. Literally NO other options!
There's one fairly close to me!! I may try to go depending on work. That's a hard time for me to get away from work.
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@runsyellowlites: seriously! I didn't even know OB's still did saddle blocks or pudendal block. That's like what my grandma got. And that fact that he walked in with it all ready to go makes me even more mad! What was I supposed to do? Say "ok hold on a sec let me stop pushing out my baby to stop and ask you questions about what you're about to give me" ugh!
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@Mrs. Jacks: @runsyellowlites: I should have fought harder against it because I knew deep down that it wasn't a good decision... But you believe that medical professionals know best - especially ones with the title professor. I didn't trust my intuition but when I saw my tiny, tiny baby who wouldn't feed for 48 hrs I knew I was right. She wasn't ready to be born. Next time we will fight all the way and I will trust my instincts more.
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@mrsjazz: @runsyellowlites: I see what you mean about NYC now. To clarify though- in my sisters case she wasn't induced, they just wanted her in the hospital instead of the birth center because she was late.
I guess I'm even more grateful for my birth experience. I'd be too scared to have a home birth, so it wouldn't be a good option for me, but one of the midwives at my practice did. But I really couldn't have asked for a better experience, other than the vacuum assistance- but I do believe it was necessary.
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@Cherrybee: I secretly cheered when your DH kidnapped you! I think that was a really good move! Ultimately I think things still went pretty good & that's what matters!
@Foodnerd81: I really wonder why there is such a cap for a birthing center?.. that's so weird. I know that there are sometimes legalities around going post date, but I've never heard of risking out if you were still within the 42 week cap. Glad that she avoided an induction though!
As for you, I think being okay with your birth is important & not feeling like you were railroaded into something that may not have been necessary is key!
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@zippylef: I'm going to be close enough that I could go to the Farm, but I just can't bring myself to do it. I have a family history of placental abruptions (even though it's not supposed to be hereditary, even my doctor thinks it needs to be watched because it's bizarre to have had so many in my family), and that happens so fast they couldn't definitely get me to a hospital on time. It makes me sad though because the Farm would be so awesome!
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@ElbieKay: I hear you sister!
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@Torchwood: From my understanding The Farm is INCREDIBLY selective of who they accept.... I think if I was accepted by them I would trust that my history was something that a. they didn't believe would be a factor or b. they've dealt with and were able to handle.......
I wonder, do they list their placental abruption rate in their stats?... going to look now! lol
FWIW there's actually a mom in the natural birth group I follow (another pregnancy/parenting site) that birthed at the farm! It seemed pretty awesome!
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@runsyellowlites: Yeah, I doubt they'd accept me since, as you said, they're selective. But even if they did, Gaskin's book made it clear that she believes fear can really hold you back in laboring. And I don't think I could get over the fear because of my family history.
I'm planning to try to work with the Vanderbilt Midwives, which is supposed to be awesome and really good for natural birth. And it's attached to a hospital, so less worry. I'm sad we're leaving Denver though, because a friend birthed at an amazing birthing center here that's directly across the street from the hospital. Close enough, but not too close.
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@runsyellowlites: Also, DH is already leery of natural birth, though he's on board. I don't think I could talk him into the Farm unless I was 100% super convinced it was best, and maybe not then. Plus, of course, I have no idea how insurance would handle it.
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@runsyellowlites: there's a mom in the natural birthing group that *I* follow that just gave birth at the farm...
The farm is awesome! I decided when I was pregnant that if baby was breech I would drive to the farm to have him. It's not super close, but close enough.
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@Torchwood: So true!!! I seriously love that woman! lol
That is sad about moving, but glad you have a good birth option nevertheless!
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@runsyellowlites: Love her too! And yep, I'm glad there's something. The closest non-hospital birthing center in TN is about an hour and a half away from Nashville, so glad to hear such good things about Vanderbilt.
And glad to see there's a good little mini-community of natural birth fans on HB. I haven't seen much about it on here.
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@Torchwood: Yea me too! Even pro-homebirthers... sometimes I feel like the only one! lol
(it actually makes me cry still to think about it)
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