In both a recent wedding and a baby shower invitation, there it was worded, "Monetary gifts are appreciated."
What the heck? Is it now becoming the norm to ask for money? Or is it still a faux pas?
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I have seen that for weddings, but not for a baby shower!
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I would definitely still consider that a faux pas!
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In my opinion, that's a faux pas for either occasion. Wedding invites in general aren't supposed to mention gifts (registry or otherwise)...
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My SIL wrote on her FB invite to my 7 yo niece's bday that all she wanted was money. I got her a present because I genuinely enjoy shopping for her and she has always really liked the stuff I pick out. We had to miss the party so I haven't given the gift yet.
I feel like it is still a faux pas.
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Stickler here. I'm gonna say that's straight up rude. 'Faux pas' is being too generous, in my ornery, old-fashioned opinion.
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Seen it for weddings, but not for showers!
I think it's annoying to write that on invites.
We give cash anyway! -
on the invitation?!?! that's not cool. i don't think you're ever supposed to mention gifts in a wedding invitation, there shouldn't be an expectation of a gift, for a shower since gifts are expected i think it's appropriate to mention where the couple registered on a card included with the invitation, but i don't really understand a shower just for cash. people like gifting items at showers, it seems extra tacky to just say you want cash. that would rub me the wrong way as a guest.
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I think it's tacky to ask for any occasion, especially in print! If you'd really like monetary gifts, I think it's better to tell a few close family members/friends and then if anyone asks them for ideas, they could mention that money would be helpful...
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@honeybear lol I agree!
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@honeybear: I agree. I would be horrified. The only people I have ever (or would ever) ask for money is my parents and I ask for it in the form of 529 contributions.
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Faux Pas
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It was ON the invitation!? Rude.
You get a toaster. I really don't like when people dictate my generosity.
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I've seen it on wedding invitations and think its a bit too forward and tasteless
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I've never seen that. It seems kind of tacky to me. I was actually surprised how many people gave us monetary gifts for our wedding.
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Tacky and rude for both. Totally fine to tell people, IF they ask, for a wedding (like I had a friend straight up ask if we preferred a registry gift or cash, so I said we didn't need any gift but if they wanted to, cash).
For a shower it just doesn't make sense.
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Tacky! Someone telling me that pretty much guarantees I will get them a toaster.
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Ah rude! When people ask for money I specifically don't give it to them. I think it's so rude!
My step dads parents threw their own 50th anniversary party and asked for cash! Lol
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I would NEVER give cash at a baby shower. That defeats the purpose of the shower... SUPER tacky.
I've had friends decline gifts for first birthday parties and ask for either a contribution to a college fund or a donation to a specific non profit and I wasn't bothered by that. (It wasn't on an invitation, just spread by word of mouth)
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That really bothers me. I don't think anyone should suggest what you should gift them unless asked.
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Faux Pas!
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I always give money at weddings and gifts at showers. It is a faux pas for the recipients to ask though.
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I was under the impression that it is still a faux pas to outright ask for cash gifts. I also thought it was in poor taste to make any mention of gifts on invitations (some say shower invitations are the exception). But sometimes I feel like a cranky grandma trapped in a 29 year old body so who knows.
What is the point of having a shower if you ask for money? Sorry, you get a cheap blender from me then!
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I think its tacky but I almost always give cash anyways
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Around here, there are things called "green showers" which are basically money gifts.
Personally, I always give cash. It's always the right size and color, it doesn't need to be exchanged.
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@honeybear: I agree!!! That's so rude!!!
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I think it's totally rude. We didn't register for our wedding and wound up with a ton of cash. We had lived together for 3 years and owned a home for 2, it felt too silly to go register for towels and stuff like that. We were remodeling our kitchen and the extra cash was nice for that! I always recommend skipping the registry if someone truly prefers cash, instead of saying "monetary gifts are appreciated" on the invites!
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Yeah, it's rude.
When I had my shower, I loved the gifts...baby stuff is so cute! I had a couple of people give money, and while I appreciated it, it just wasn't as fun to open.
For a wedding, it makes a little more sense, but I think it's rude to ask for it.
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I think in some places people are much more likely to give money than tangible gifts, but I'm not sure that asking for money is appropriate anywhere.
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Wow, I think it's a faux pas to ask no matter what the occasion is! It seems more common to give monetary gifts for weddings though.
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29 comments