Just want to remind everyone the most valuable thing you can give to your child is honest communication, Once the trust is made and they feel secure, the are open to anyhing you say.. We told our 3 from birth that they were not allowed to yell at or touch their sibling. Our evenings were peaceful. Nap time rules , be still be quiet and close your eyes. My kids napped everyday into kindergarden. Misbehavior is a lack of discipline. Tell them all you think and feel and they will grow up to be well behaved ,open and honest to themself. In other words why wait til baby is two or three to state that they are not allowed to cross the line into the kitchen. All of ours as crawlers learned where to stop even if I wasn't looking. Yes of course the tested me, but I never let them do it because IT IS NOT ALLOWED. Call us stern, but I never had a toddler underfoot while cooking or in the cabinets. Never babyproofed home, just taught them what they could and couldn't do when I had their trust. Our children never wandered they always "said hey I messed up" So parents please as you think of birthing, which stroller, pacifier or thumb, take a few minutes. Ask yourself, "What kind of person do I want my child to Be" teach them the skills they need in life to become all they want with love and happiness.
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Is there any point at all to this post?
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yes give at least as much thought into nuturing and communicating so there wont be a need to discipline
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Alrighty then.
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@abueladela: welcome to Hellobee!
Curious what your username means...
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@mrbee: Abuela is grandmother in Spanish
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@abueladela: I'm a little confused - were your children able to hug each other if they were not allowed to touch each other? Yes sometime children can be rough with one another but they can also be impossibly caring if you give them the chance
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@Boopers: Yah I figured it was something along the lines of, "grandma of the"... but wasn't sure what the rest of it was. So figured maybe it meant something specific!
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@mrbee: oh gotcha! Not sure then
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Bless your heart for this post!
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my grandmothers name was Adela. Yes they were allowed to hug, not hit or slap or grab or disrespect each other , taught yours mine and our space. Respect each other. Very simple. Always be kind and talk with loving mind. Just saying I am proud of my kids and it was the most important part of my life. Raising them to become thoughtful and kind adults.,with strong work ethics and sense of pride. Isn't that what we all want for our kids. Don;t wait to late to begin teaching the skills they need in life. I see so many parents that assume infants aren't able to learn, so why do more than change and feed them. HOGWASH. Language is the key, just talk to them about everyday life and see how much they learn. READ anything you see to them so they can learn what they want by simply reading later in life. Help them to be self sufficient not whining cuddled little brats at two and three and four. We allow them to do something that you will have to not allow later in life.
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@abueladela: welcome to Hellobee. One thing I've learned from this site is that all children are different and what works for some won't work for the others. I think there are pros and cons to all parenting types.
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Nobody likes a know it all
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not a know it all, i am always learning, and what I have experienced in the past 35 years gives value to my post. You would have to be open to learning to have understood anything I said. I was sharing my experiences. I doubt that a child would become a troubled teen because of which stroller or pacifier they used as an infant. I don;t consider anything I said to be a type of parenting, it is a way of life for all human beings. Be loving caring and kind. Be true to yourself and respect yourself and others, That's all I meant. Those are the values that matter, Not which preschool you can afford. If you raise an inconsiderate selfish child they become inconsiderate self centered adults, regardless of the discipline you tried after you screwed them up.
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Some children turn out great in spite of their parents, and some children who come from great families, still make poor decisions. Ultimately who a person becomes rests on their individual decisions. As parents we must do the best job we can do, and I know that all of us parents here on HB are doing just that, and hope and pray our children make the right decisions.
I have to agree with leialou here, what works for one family won't always work for another.
I'm positive that the wonderful mothers of hellobee know their priorities as well. No one here has said that choosing the right stroller or carseat is more important than teaching a child to be kind and polite.
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Advice is best received when it is asked for, not when it is forced upon.
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@blackbird: LOL
@abueladela: I think you probably have kind intentions, but a forum like this isn't usually very receptive to people just popping in and stepping up on a soapbox about their viewpoint, even if it's one they agree with. It's hard to have a conversation about anything (the point of a forum) if one person is stating their opinion as fact, ya know? -
ALL kids misbehave.
ALL of them!
It's developmentally appropriate for them to test boundaries.
I agree that language is very powerful, and it's something I focus a lot on, but it's not the only way that children learn. It's not even the only way that adults learn!
Infants are capable of learning, but that doesn't mean they need to learn not to touch my cabinets at that stage. They learn things that are developmentally appropriate, and baby-proofing is a great way to create a safe environment for that to happen. I suggest implementing elements of RIE in creating reciprocal relationships with infants and toddlers over relying on language alone.
I realize I probably went overboard on this comment. Oh well!
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Yikes! It seems like you happened upon HelloBee and incorrectly assumed this community only cares about and discusses things like baby gear and the price of preschools. In actuality, this is a space for profound support to those in need of it, a source of advice from those who've been there and bought the t-shirt to those who don't know what they're doing yet, a safe place to respectfully debate varying viewpoints on topics that range from parenting to politics, and, yes, and place to ask questions about the best strollers and pacifiers. It takes a village, after all, and HelloBee is a pretty damn awesome one.
Unfortunately, you've most likely blown your chance to be a part of it. Whoopsie.
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@MamaMagpie:
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ok i get it
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I apologize for being on a soapbox. The parents who leave their children in my care from 630am to 630pm are not as enlightened as the members here.. Not being able to express to parents what their infant needs are and that they are showing signs of emotional neglect is heart wrenching.
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Leaving a child in daycare for 12 hours a day is illegal in my state
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@blackbird: wow I need even thought of that...although I sort of assumed op meant that she's open during those hours.
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That's so sad
I can imagine your frustration and heartache.
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