It's taken me a long time to trust people with my LO, mostly because if something happened to her I wouldn't be able to go on. She is the most important person in our lives. I am fine leaving her with someone or having someone at our house to watch her but I really don't like anyone taking her out and about. I do have a lot of anxiety and I think that plays a big roll in trusting people.
Anyone else have trust issues?
GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22276 posts
I let people take her out, but only like my mom or sister. My BFF took her out once and I got a little anxious, but she was only 5 weeks old so it was to be expected. I would NEVER let a teenager take her out. It's the same thing with people watching her at home, I only let certain people watch her because I get super nervous.
cantaloupe / 6630 posts
Definitely. I trust DH implicitly because I know he loves her as much as I do but will struggle leaving her with anybody else. We live overseas from our families so haven't got anyone to leave her with anyway but I'm sure I'll have issues leaving her with family when we visit them, because she doesn't know them.
persimmon / 1150 posts
@Mrsbells: @Bao: I'm glad I'm not the only one! I've just started to trust my mom and dad but having a hard time with DHs side but that's probably because I haven't known them very long. LO is 16 months old so I'm hoping it gets better as she gets older.
wonderful clementine / 24134 posts
@lovelife: I have issues with DH's side as well. I just don't trust that they would buckle her up correctly, not feed her foods she isn't supposed to have, not let her get sunburned, etc.
persimmon / 1134 posts
I have pretty bad anxiety, and at 9 months pp I still feel anxious when I'm away from LO. My mom or DH mom watches LO on the evenings I work, and I still worry and check on her. I was a hot mess when I first returned to work, but it has gotten better. I prefer that no one else besides me or DH takes her out though. My mom thinks that I'm weird for that...
grapefruit / 4817 posts
I've never let anyone take him out and about, either, but I think now at 9 months, I'm getting close to being fine about it all. I've been really needing a break lately, so I've been dropping him off with my MIL more and more, so hopefully I'll be able to let go a bit here and there until it doesn't stress me out so much. Still not sure if I'm ready to leave him overnight, but I think I'm close. It helps to have your kid go through a whiny phase. 
persimmon / 1150 posts
I think I might have been better sooner but one of DHs family members took LO out to a clients house and didn't tell us. If something would have happened absolutely no one would have known where they were. and sometimes when this person watches her she invites others over and never mentions they were coming so its a surprise when DH and I arrive home. I just don't like sneakiness.
GOLD / wonderful apricot / 22276 posts
@lovelife: I also have issues with DH's side. I have seen/heard the things they try and pull with my niece, against BIL and SIL's wishes. Plus they smoke. No way. Never ever will they watch LO.
persimmon / 1150 posts
@bree72: I agree. I've need more breaks from LO since shes getting naughty and whiny! LO has stayed with my mom overnight twice now. I think its also hard because both sides our families have very different lifestyles than we do (lives with SOs whom we don't know very well.., busy lifestyles..etc.)
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
I was nervous when I left my LO with BIL & SIL but everything went well!
coconut / 8498 posts
I'm getting better. We don't live near our families, so we rarely have a chance for LO to stay with them. I would be okay with my parents taking LO anywhere, but I have a hard time with DH's parents. They wouldn't do anything dangerous, but they would do things lie feed her foods that we don't (ie lots of sweets) and not buckle her in correctly (ok, that is dangerous).
grapefruit / 4582 posts
@bree72: haha this is exactly where I am too. DD is so clingy and whiny. I can't leave the room without her becoming hysterical (this only happens when we're alone). DH & I have our first overnight planned for next week. I need a break! Lol
pear / 1610 posts
My parents and my in laws are the only ones who have really taken DS anywhere. My parents have an extra cares eat that we installed for them and I have really stressed proper buckling and such so they get it now. My MIL has only really driven DS somewhere once and she took our car and car seat and I showed her the right way to buckle him. We have a great relationship and I know MIL wouldnt do anything against our wishes.
Also, I heard or read somewhere before that grandparents actually drive more carefully with their grandchildren than parents drive with their children. It did still take a little while for me to be super comfortable with it though!
grapefruit / 4817 posts
@lovelife: @luckypenny: It's so funny how this whiny stage has changed my whole attitude. He's been driving me insane for about a week now, and I couldn't wait to go drop him off at Grandma's this morning. It's been so nice at work today without him. I feel kid of bad, but seriously, the kid's killing me.
grapefruit / 4582 posts
@bree72: bahaha I feel the same way. Just to drink coffee in peace....heaven
GOLD / wonderful grape / 20289 posts
LO is 18 months and the only people who have watched her are her grandparents. So yes I'd say I have trust issues when it comes to LO.
My mom recently hired a nanny to help her out with my niece and I'm starting to trust her, she's great with LO and my niece. So maybe someone other than family will get to watch LO one day.
blogger / pomegranate / 3300 posts
We only leave our kids with family or church child care. My oldest is in preschool so I also leave him with teachers bi think it gets easier as they get older
GOLD / pineapple / 12662 posts
This won't happen for a long time. And there are some family members that will never be in the circle of trust!
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