How long would you let a 7m old cry before nap and bedtime? We are struggling with our LO and just curious what other Moms think.
-
I know this isn’t really helpful, but it will depend on your kid. My first cried before every sleep. It was usually 5-10 min. I did checks with her at 3 min, 5, min and 10 min. I think she cried 25 min at the longest. And I remember once she cried/whimpered for around an hour once. But it was more cry 30’sec, quiet for 2 min, cry 40 sec, quiet 5 min and so on. My second does not cry to sleep, so I tend to avoid it. I’ve done up to 30 min at naps and maybe 20 min at night. Both those times I gave up and rocked to sleep. He just kept escalating.
-
20 min for nap, for bedtime I would only do it if I’m going to actually train so I would be comfortable for up to an hour the first night knowing it will go down quickly
-
Both my kids have been absolutely hysterical when I do those Ferber “checks” and I’ve found that extinction works way better for them.
From about four or five months with LO2 I was letting her cry up to an hour as long as she didn’t sound hysterical (she tended to cry a few minutes, then babble, then cry, then babble). But I’d only let her cry hard for maybe 15 minutes? I’d go in and nurse her, put her back and try again.
Now at 7 months it’s more about the sound of her cry. If it’s just a whiney cry I’ll let her go up to 30-40 minutes (but again, this is mostly Bc I know that if she’s crying longer than that, she’s probably hungry or has pooped). If she’s hysterical I usually go in and see if somethings wrong, and if she’s fine I’ll let her cio for 10-15 minutes. Then I’ll see if she wants to nurse. Sometimes she’s just overtired and needs to sleep, and has to cry herself out before she’ll sleep.
Both my kids refuse to go to sleep if I’m there (except for MOTN), so I just reach a point where I have to let them cry.
My 2.5 year old still regularly cries before nap and bed and I’ve spent so many years tampering with her routine to see what works. For us I’ve just had to accept that I’ve got crappy sleepers. My husband’s Family has a history of sleep disturbances, so while it’s disheartening to have my kids cry everyday, it’s not totally surprising.
Sorry this is a novel!
-
Agree with all the ladies above! About an hour as long as they aren't losing their shit. I just did this last night with DD. She's 8 months going on 9 and she was in her crib for about an hour crying on and off until she went nuts and I had to go get her.
-
I posted this right when I started trying to sleep train my son. We’ve been trying for a week now and it’s not getting better. He cries for at least 2 hours every night and the longest he’s slept was 3 hours. Checking on him would make him hysterical so we stopped checking. But I’m having a hard time leaving him to cry for so long. Last night he cried nonstop without zoning out or dozing off for 2 hours. I had to go get him.
My first son I nursed to sleep and he would go into his crib asleep and stay asleep. With my second no matter what we do (nurse to sleep, rock to sleep, put him in drowsy) he cries for hours. I’m at my wits end! Please tell me someone else has gone through this! I’m thinking I might need to do the checks even if he cries more? I hate just leaving him in there.
-
@Ali-oop: this was my daughter. She was awful. She didn't sleep, we tried cio and gave up after she cried for 2 hours getting more hysterical as time went on. We tried a few times but eventually just accepted we had to lay with her until she fell asleep, this was easier as she slept on a floor bed.
Around 22 months she started waking when we got up to leave so we tried letting her go to sleep on her own again and that time it worked. She sleeps great now, goes down by herself and sleeps all night. So there's light at the end of the tunnel, it just might be far -
@Ali-oop: 20 mins, go in to check. 20 more mins, go in to check. Repeat until one of you gives in
-
@MamaBear87: That’s the problem. If I lay with him and he falls asleep 75% of the time he wakes up when I get up. So he’s currently sleeping with us at night and I lay down with him when my 2 year old takes a nap. So for example this morning he slept on my husband for 45 minutes. I laid down with him when my toddler took a nap and all was fine until my two-year-old woke up. I thought I had snuck away successfully but as I was putting my two-year-old back to sleep I hear the little one cry. Now he won’t go back to sleep so here I sit with him. He’s in a great mood now but once he realizes he only got an hour of sleep he will be looking to go back to sleep. And if I put him in the crib he will literally cry for hours. It’s like a vicious cycle that we are in.
@Autumnmama79: That could go on all night! He’s probably as stubborn as me. But I think I need to bring back the checks for my sanity. I’m sure he’s fine in there but I feel bad for not checking on him at all.
Reply
Subscribe to our newsletter
- Google Plus
- Stumbleupon
- Twitter
- Facebook
- Pinterest
- Favorite1
8 comments