Background: LO is 2 & 3 months. She's very verbal, and also very active and strong willed.

I SAH. We do playdates or activities almost every day, but the only thing we do where I am not with her during the day is the gym daycare. She is there for about 45 minutes to 1 hour, a couple times per week. The caregivers and other kids vary though there are often familiar faces.

So, all that to say: LO is being aggressive to the other children in "sharing situations." I will pick her up and be told that she has pulled hair, pushed, or today she put a child in a headlock over a toy. I am trying to figure out what to do to help this situation. Going to the gym is important to me and I also think it is good for her to be away from me for short periods.

She struggles with sharing and being kind when at playgroups, but I am able to intervene. Even though I don't "helicopter," there is better supervision and understanding that boundaries will be enforced when we are with friends than at the gym daycare.

What I currently do with LO is talk to her about being a good friend, taking turns and being gentle on our way there. I try to keep it simple, clear and positive. I don't really discipline her when I pick her up because I feel like the moment has passed.

I have told the gym caregivers the two phrases that are really helpful in other situations: "You can take a turn, and then I get back," and "When you feel so mad that you want to roar, take a deep breath, and count to four." (Yes, Daniel Tiger is our main parenting tool.) But I just don't know how realistic it is for them to actively manage these situations when they have a high ratio and kids are coming & going.

***I interrupt this post to say that Daniel Tiger just asked, "Do you take turns?" LO shook her head emphatically NO. ***

I am wondering if she is old enough to understand a reward system... like I could get some dollar store toys, show it to her before we go and say, "If you take turns and are gentle to friends, you will get this when I pick you up. If you are not gentle, you will not get this when I pick you up." She is so verbal but she also feels like such a baby still so I don't know if that is realistic. Obviously in the moment, she gets worked up and I don't know that she can really self-regulate to remember incentives.

So... Suggestions? Thanks!