Hellobee Boards

I would write down all your concerns and preferences and then just talk to the daycares when you go in to tour/interview them. The daycare we’ve picked emails you a daily status “what did baby do today” along with a couple of pictures of her enjoying the activities of the day, and charts in every time she eats/sleeps/diaper change and any activities she does. That info they provide would be easy to review and request changes to if you found it didn’t line up with what you were hoping from the daycare center. Not all daycare centers do this though, of course! And of course, when you have 1 person caring for 3 or 4 infants, not everyone's individual style preference can always be accommodated.

If you are really strict about sticking to a certain parenting style like AP, or having a very rigid daily timeline, a small in-home daycare run by someone who also APs, or a nanny might be a better fit than a larger center.

We’re not into AP so it’s not an issue for us – the center has a sort of schedule but of course, baby ultimately calls the shots. Hope this helps - I would just suggest interviewing lots of daycares and not being afraid to ask all your questions and let them know what you are looking for until you find a good fit.

I would look for a daycare center that believes in your philosophies. Our daycare philosophy is based on Attachment based care giving. The infant room you pretty much control the schedule and they provide a daily sheet of when they ate, how much they ate, durations of naps and all diaper changes (when and what). Different centers will have different guidelines on the ratio of caregiver to child but in our center it was 1 to 2 which was very important to me with a max of 4 infants. So as the infants age out of the infant room one of the caregivers will also transition with them to the toddler room and a toddler teacher will transition down thus keeping at least one familiar caregiver in the transition. The attachment does end at 2.5 when the chile enter the early preschool program and has a new set of teachers but they to a transition period over a month and have the child spend a few hours each week in their new class. I really lucked out with this center, I didn't like the first center i had used for my first child when we lived back east.

I think in this case, I'd look for a home based daycare instead of a center. I think there's more flexibility in schedules or lack thereof in a smaller environment.

I think you'll just have to interview a lot of different providers, and may well have better luck with a smaller in-home provider than a center (unless you find one like Amy's that is expressly AP-oriented).
We've used two different daycares so far in LO's life. The first one had two teachers for 3 kids over the summer when LO was there (there were a couple more kids coming for the fall), and they were VERY communicative with us and pretty much willing to follow whatever schedule we wanted. They were fine with sleeping/eating on demand. (They wouldn't cloth diaper or babywear though, so those AP common practices would have been out)
LO's current center is a lot more structured. There are 2 teachers for 5 kids, and they have set meal times and flexible but semi-structured nap times (there's nap time for everyone after lunch, and they have "quiet time" in the mornings to encourage napping for those kids who need/want it, but they don't force it... and if a kid is otherwise really obviously sleepy they'll often stick him/her in a stroller and wheel him/her around the hallways till the kid falls asleep).
We are really lucky to have an LO who is incredibly chill. He's fine on a schedule, and fine off a schedule. (I think some kids thrive on a schedule and some really thrive off a schedule, but it doesn't seem to matter to him) So I think the nature (and age... I would actively WANT my two year old on a schedule with other kids, whereas I'd rather my 2 month old be able to eat/sleep on demand...) of your kid may be a good guide for this.

@daniellemybelle: there is a montessori school on my corner but they only start from 18 months. the hours are 9 am - 3 pm so that would have to work with your working hours, too.

ETA - i am also not sure if montessori does part time programs since it is really like school and not day care - so it is more of a daily attendance thing but i am not 100% sure.

In my area they don't offer montessori for infants. We chose an in home daycare based on the feeling we had meeting with the woman. DS was the youngest at 6 months and would remain the youngest for at least 9 more months, since only 2 can be under two years old and she had a girl just over one year when DS started.
I guess I wasn't totally sure what to expect, as far as a schedule for DS. She fed him on demand, but he usually ate every 2 hours, so it was kind of set times. Sleeping was the hardest adjustment for me. She let him cry it out for naps until he got used to the schedule. Now, a few months later he puts himself to sleep at daycare and at home without crying at all. But at the time it was hard for me to handle. But she couldn't rock him to sleep quietly with 5 other kids to care for, even if they are older. In the end it has made our life easier, and he sleeps so well now. At daycare he takes 1 nap when the older kids nap, for about 2 hours. At home on weekends he will take 2 or sometimes 3 naps, but he won't sleep with the other kids awake at daycare. He bounces back from weekends with us and gets right back into his schedule, but he is in daycare full time during the week.

I would find a day care that matches your values and then I would try to start matching their schedule at home.

@daniellemybelle: wow, that is great! and i am impressed at all the research you are doing!

One random thought: when we put Charlie into daycare, we were so nervous that he would not adapt to the daycare's eating and sleeping schedule. But he shocked us with his adaptability, and napped great the very first day! It took him a little while to eat comfortably there (he's not that great at eating solids even now), but after a little time he ate better at daycare than he does at home!

I guess my general point is that a lot of kids shock their parents with their adaptability! Not every child is adaptable of course... but we sure were surprised at how easily he made the transition! Other than the separation anxiety that is... that took a few weeks to wear off.

I just toured a daycare yesterday. Their particular policy was at the infant age (0 - 14 months), they follow the baby's schedule. Eat, sleep, play, whatever the baby wants. (They had a 1 to 3 teacher to baby ratio). Then when they hit 15 months and go into the toddler class, they are put on a group schedule. The lady who gave us the tour said that it sounds like a big change but most of the time, they are able to get the kids to eat, sleep, and play at the same time.

Every daycare is different so that is definitely something to ask questions on if/when you decide to go on a tour!