How do you know when the constant whining and mini tantrums and food throwing (yes, food throwing) is developmental and communication frustration rather than brattiness?
I generally ignore, walk away from these kind of negative behaviors, but I am wondering if I need to start bringing my A game.
And, um, there is a chance that she has, up until now, pretty mu ch gotten whatever she wanted, but never as the result of naughty behavior; she just never wanted anything unreasonable. Now that we have to say 'no' more often, well, it is not going super great.
And,...she is really irritating me!
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I am hoping to hear a chorus of, "Mine, too!"
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I attribute my son's brat nature to the fact that he's having to share me with baby sister. So no advice but lots of love momma. I'm with you and my kid's 19 months with a 6 month old sibling.
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Hard to say really. I know a lot of moms with LO the same age. And we all agree they are going through a tantrum stage. But there is a fine line to saying yes to everything. ...
We get quite a few meltdowns when we say no. Diversion usually works. Or food. When all else fails; food works. -
Mine too!
I think it's a phase...I hope...
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@locavore_mama: I think I taught him 'food fixes everything'. This kid will have a body thrown on the floor, pout beyond belief, whining to the point of distraction fit. I will reprimand as best I can. Then he runs to the kitchen, presses his nose to the fridge and waits for me to open it so he can get some grapes or yogurt or cheese.
Little imp...won't talk but what he's saying is veeeeery clear.
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My LO was such a good/easy baby...but around 19 months we started to see some of the bratty behavior and it comes and goes every few weeks (now 22 months). I think it's natural for a child to test boundaries (they aren't necessarily being bad)...and I think it's my role as a parent to establish clear boundaries. I'm very firm and try my best to correct her behavior...obviously easier said than done. My LO gets 2 warnings/opportunities to correct the behavior and if she does not listen she usually gets whatever it is taken away or I hold her hands and talk to her. If she is bratty and won't listen or acts out she goes into time out. This has happened maybe 2-3 times. Most of the time she listens to my explanation and can refocus and apologize ("sorry mama"). It's so hard to know what works best for each kid but this is what works for us. I think kids are much smarter than we give them credit for and can understand a lot. My parenting style is to be consistent and firm as early on as possible so expectations are clear and just a part of life and not something suddenly sprung on them one day.
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My LO is a few months younger than yours so we're not there yet, but I've been reading a book called "Positive Discipline" that's pretty good at giving ways to be kind and firm to teach kids social skills and acceptable behavior. It focuses a lot on figuring out what kind of person your LO is, and different ways to react based on that. http://www.amazon.com/Positive-Discipline-Toddler-Laying-Foundation-Confident/dp/0307341593/ref=pd_sim_b_2
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I feel like @Mr. Bee: had a good post about this before. Can't remember what keywords would be good to search... I'll try to find it!
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OK, here is the post I was thinking about. Not sure if it applicable to your situation, but I found the tactics to be interesting and worth a try (in the future, in my case). Good luck!
http://www.hellobee.com/2012/06/26/the-best-parenting-book-ive-ever-read/
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@sandy: agree! LO will like to smack us or the dog now and she thinks it's funny. When that happens we put on our stern face and explain why we don't hit. Then we expect her to say sorry to whomever she hit. She can't say sorry yet so we make her give a kiss and hug.
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We went through this, for us, it was boundary testing. He's pretty much over it now, because he finally understands consequences, but I admit, the time between 18-30 months was really, ummmm, stressful and challenging.
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@locavore_mama: Oh, the hitting of the dog drives me insane! We don't hit our dogs for discipline and I hate it when people let their babies get away with hitting pets, and now MY baby is the one who sneaks in whacks! We do a stern no and actually move her away from the dog and, oh, how she wails, but then she will try it again in several minutes. Sometimes we pay lots of attention to the dogs when she is being naughty, praising them for be good and obedient in hopes she'll want to get in on the deal, lol.
@NaturallyCathy: bahahaha! see, that is the kind of thing that makes it hard to stay irritated- how cute!
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@looch: So there is an end in sight? Good to know!
@lizzywiz: Seriously, if it's not nose to the fridge, it's staring and pointing at the Goldfish as if it's gold in bite sized form. Must. Nom.
I think it's a phase...I hope...
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