It hasn't even been a week since LO arrived and I've gotten a barrage of comments from my dad:
"Don't forget to lose weight. Too many moms get fat after they give birth."
"Are you breastfeeding? It will keep you from getting fat."
"Why are you putting your baby in the car seat?! You're going to crush his spine! Please let him lie flat in the car!"
"You need to let him sleep on his stomach. It's healthier for him."
I just can't even anymore.
honeydew / 7916 posts
@Mrs.Someone: It's mostly just emails...apparently I sent him the wrong photos. And he happened to see a photo of me a few hours after giving birth, with tons of IV fluids, ugh.
GOLD / wonderful pomegranate / 28905 posts
@spaniellove: 
so he doesn't want to help but will put you down?
Don't listen to him. I'm sure you are doing great. Big hugs!
pomelo / 5228 posts
@spaniellove: Ugh, I think they should "accidentally" go into spam for a while...
honeydew / 7295 posts
Oh boy! This actually made me laugh out loud because its so ridiculous it seems like he should be joking. I'm so sorry. Ugh
pomelo / 5678 posts
Ugh my goodness! My dad is the same way. He thinks car seats are child abuse (that's just one example!) I do my best to tune it out!
clementine / 990 posts
There's nothing wrong with cutting people out of your life who are not good for your life. My dad made some pretty awful comments about my ability to be a mother as well. We have not spoken in 18 months. And I can't think of any reason that I would speak to him again. (You don't have to be that extreme, my situation was a long time coming, but it won't hurt to block him for a bit).
honeydew / 7916 posts
@Mrs.Someone: Oops, don't know how that happened 
@MrsMccarthy: It is ridiculous!
hostess / wonderful apple seed / 16729 posts
@spaniellove: Your dad is just... I don't even have words for him. I'm sorry you keep having to hear these comments from him. Hugs!!
pomegranate / 3706 posts
Woooow. Those comments about your body especially are completely uncalled for. I'm very sorry. Be good to yourself, and tune that drivel right out.
cantaloupe / 6131 posts
@spaniellove: Ummm yeah, he sounds like he's buddies with my dad. Just delete and ignore and focus on that delicious baby.
My dad told me that my fertility troubles and my prior brain tumor were caused by (a) being fat and (b) drinking diet coke and that it was all my fault. THANKS.
honeydew / 7916 posts
@gingerbebe: Oh yeah, there were variations on that one too. Like that I was too old (31 at the time). Then he made up reasons why I had a m/c. Where do they get these?
persimmon / 1313 posts
Ugh, so sorry for that! That's terribly insensitive and untrue. To the spam folder they go!
wonderful pomelo / 30692 posts
Holy smokes! I can't even... this is CRAZY! I would definitely ignore e-mails from him for a while!!! So sorry you're dealing with stuff like this!!
eggplant / 11408 posts
Spam folder, my friend. Spam. Folder.
J is delicious, and you are adorable. Also, I am here to tell you that I haven't lost a pound in 6 weeks, and I'm BFing until my nipples fall off. So yeah...tune out that noise.
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21616 posts
I'm so sorry 
lack of support from a parent just kills the spirit sometimes. And obviously his comments are outdated, not to mention unsafe. You are an amazing mother I'm sure and doing an incredible job!! I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.
pomelo / 5041 posts
Oh you poor thing. Just ignore him! I have a family member who had lots to say like that while I was pregnant. It bothered me but I just tried to ignore what she said.
Grandparents always think they know best too. It's important to stand firm and say you're going to do what you want to do and they need to leave you alone and respect your wishes, especially when you're following safety requirements that may have changed since they have kids. And pick your battles...I'm continuously arguing with my mom about giving Jack things like ice cream and chocolate but there are times when I give in because there are bigger battles to fight.
pomegranate / 3231 posts
@LovelyPlum: Yes, spam folder indeed! Just block him out for a few weeks til you get your bearings.
wonderful olive / 19353 posts
OMG!! No ma'am!! Agreed on spam folder - geez louise!!! *hugs*
pear / 1672 posts
Wait, so he wants you to put a newborn on the backseat of your car? Really? I'm so sorry. I hope he gets more supportive over time.
persimmon / 1085 posts
Those are horrible things that he said to you. I wouldn't respond to those comments if he says anything else again. Or tell him how his comments have made you feel!! Or like many others above said, distance yourself!! Hope you are baby are doing great. 
watermelon / 14467 posts
I can't find the words to express my rage on your behalf. You are an excellent mother and baby J is so lucky to have you. Don't listen to your dad.
pomegranate / 3791 posts
Holy shit, you have a newborn! All you need to do is rest, feed the baby, and let the baby sleep. I hate your dad. You are not supposed to be worrying about your weight at ALL right now - your body JUST started to recover! And the rest of his advice...I'm sure I don't even have to say that he's an idiot.
nectarine / 2358 posts
How do you feel about telling your dad to just shut the fuck up? Sorry for the language but that pisses me off.
bananas / 9227 posts
Oj! Grandpa needs to take a chill pill! If and when you can't take it anymore, let him have it! He's messing with a new mom, he really is asking for it.
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