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We don't ever have adult only food

As for alcohol - they have both sipped it before - whatever, to each his own!

They do both have plastic wine and martini glasses that they like to drink water out of

Same as @autumnlove: Our LOs know that some drinks are for adults (wine, beer, coffee, soda, and tea) and that's that. It's never been an issue (our LOs are nearly 3.5 yrs and 21 months).

I have a 15 month old and currently struggling with this with M&Ms and such... but at 2, I think a little cider in a plastic wine glass is great! I remember I was young, my sister and I used to get something similar in sturdier ceramic goblets at Thanksgiving and it always helped make us feel included.

My LO knows some things are for adults only and it's not a problem. I don't feel the need to go out of my way to make her feel included. I would rather she see wine as completely off limits to her than for her to get a mock version. Sometimes you don't get to do everything that someone else is doing, that's life.

We're going through this a little bit - we share pretty much everything with B so when we have something off limits (wine, pop, etc) he has a hard time with it. We've been telling him that this drink is only for grownups, and giving him a special drink of his own (apple juice cut with water - poor kid doesn't understand how lame that is). I think having a special drink of cider in a special glass is a good idea, and you can emphasize that some drinks are just for grownups but here's a special drink for them that's just for kids.

Same as others. Some drinks are for adults. Never been an issue.

LO knows that wine is only for grownups (same as coffee). She's never questioned it or tried to drink either wine or coffee.

If your LO has learned and accepts that coffee is off-limits, why do you think it would be different for wine/beer? I would think they would accept that rule as well. (?)

I think the behaviour of being into the cups is what you should try to address, not so much what's in them, does that make sense?

I taught my son from very early on that we do not drink out of any one else's cups and we don't let anyone drink out of ours. It's worked incredibly well.

This has never been an issue for us. We drink often at home. And it's "mommy's drink" or "daddy's drink" But hey! You can have your own! And if you cry about it? Well...sorry, dude. Since we don't let E drink out of our coffee cups or wine glasses or beers or whatever, she doesn't really push it.

I wouldn't let him have his own stuff in a wine glass b/c what's stopping him from not realizing it's NOT alcohol?

We often have drinks (alcohol, juice, soda) around LO that we don't allow her to have and she understands these things are off limits for her.

I was allowed to drink alcohol at family gatherings once I turned 13 and it actually helped me to develop a healthy relationship with it and not want to abuse it! As for my 2 yo, he knows that coffee and alcohol are off limits and never questions it. We are pretty liberal with things we let him try/do so I think he understands that this is actually a big deal.

LO knows coffee, soda, wine and beer are for adults and not for kids. We enjoy all of those enough that she's had enough practice being turned down

Honestly, I wouldn't stress about it because if it's not this, it will be some other thing. The holidays bring out lots of delightful behavior in kiddos so I expect it to be draining and challenging no matter what...

Same as everyone, but at 4 I've now gone into specifics about how alcohol (and pot, now legal in my state) are things that make you feel a little funny, and that it can be fun at times, but that you need to be an adult first because it can also make you feel sick. I don't really drink, but my husband is a home brewer and always has a beer or two with dinner.

My parents did not model responsible alcohol consumption and I'm determined to do so for my children. I don't want to fetishize it, or make it this forbidden fruit. I want to demonstrate that it is a fun part of life when used in a rational and reasonable way. So my children will try it in small amounts as they get older and will always see us doing the same. I'll have to figure out how to do the same with pot, I guess? As legalization spread. Harder to do when smoking it around them exposes them to it, unlike alcohol.

I just tell my two year old that my wine, coffee, whatever is a mama drink. It hasn't been an issue. She has yelled out "mama juice" several times in the trader Joe's wine section though.

Two year olds are pretty smart, if he knows he can't drink coffee because it's for grown ups, and you tell him some/beer is like coffee, just for grown ups, I can't imagine this being that big of a deal. I mean, he's two, I expect my 2.5 year old will probably find something to be whiny about at Thabksgiving dinner because that's kind of just what toddlers do. But I don't think giving him a special glass and drink that will feel like a kiddie version of wine is a good solution - it just blurs that line/limit.

@Zbug: LOL!

@wonderstruck: Right. I am resigned to LO doing something annoying at some point during Thanksgiving so no point in even trying to stave it off

@Zbug: lol, my LO has "helpfully" (and loudly) reminded me that "you need to get you some wine, mama!" in the grocery store. More than once.

Never been an issue for us, we have beer/wine/coffee at meals frequently. We choose not to make it a big deal out of it, they get their cups, we get ours.