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We are probably going to choose friends. My parents have said that they want to be the guardians, but we don't really want them to be. We love them but I want DS to have young parents. And none of our siblings are viable options at this time.

As for the conversation with family, we just won't tell anyone. Except the guardians of course. I'm not going to sit down with my parents and explain why they'll be too old or not energetic enough, or how my dad was kind of harsh when I was a kid. And I definitely won't sit down with our siblings and tell them all that they're unfit as parents.

It's honestly no one else's business and hopefully they'll never have to find out.

We chose family, but we are the non family guardians for some friends of ours' child. They have family options but they aren't the healthiest. She said they chose us because we have such similar values and they know we'd take care of him like one of our own. The conversation was easy-we were very honored. She also informed us about their life insurance policies and the like to let us know that we wouldn't be financially burdened, which didn't even cross my mind, but his college education, etc are covered and it is no surprise

We chose family (my parents) but if our situation changed (like if my parents' health declined or they passed) we would probably do non-family guardians over our siblings or my husband's parents. It would be hard but the most important thing is a healthy environment for our kid. I hope my brother gets it together at some point and he could be the guardian but his wife's family is so toxic and invades their life so much I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving her in his care as things stand.

@raintreebee: wow, that'd be a huge bomb to drop on someone!

We chose non-family guardians. My in-laws and my parents are retired and like to travel, and couldn't keep up with LO full time. None of our siblings would be good choices. We chose friends who have kids, great jobs, and similar values. They were touched and there were lots of tears when we asked them.

We had siblings to choose and chose an unrelated couple. Our parents were out of the question because they already raised us. I think they all appreciate and respect that decision. They can still be grandparents if something happened to us. The friends we chose are raising their children very similar to how our daughter is being raised (and any future siblings). Our siblings are either not in a position at this time to raise a child, or would give our children a very different upbringing/life experience than we would choose for them.

Both sets of grandparents know, and the guardians also know. None of our siblings know yet, but I am the super anxious/worrier type and think they should. My fear is that something happens to us and there are really hard feelings that interfere with DD's relationship with them. The reasons we didn't choose family are actually very simple, and while a difficult conversation, I think would actually be well understood after all is said and done.