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I am so sorry to hear this! Thinking of you!

My good friend miscarried around the same time and she kept it really quiet.

I am so sorry. We miscarried at 8.5 weeks, and we hadn't told many people we were pregnant. I did end up telling a close coworker after the fact, because I needed someone who knew at work if I needed some support.

It's so so hard, and so personal. You'll know what's best, I really wanted to tell my friend, so I did. If you don't feel comfortable, then don't tell anyone.

Again, I am so sorry for your loss, and I know how you feel and just want to lend my support. Please feel free to write on my wall if you need to chat.

I think it is a personal decision, I wouldn't let your MIL decide what to do in this situation, as it is your loss that you need to deal with. I woudl just explain that you both will discuss how you want to handle the situation and go from there.

My sister with her 2nd miscarriage hadn't told us she was pregnant, and she said it was harder to deal with telling us she lost it but wanted us (other sister and I) to be there for support. Since then she always let us know right away when she was pregnant so we would be in the loop. I think it is a completley personal decision on how you handle emotions and loss.

@MrsH: I'm so sorry for your loss Who you tell, if you choose to, is your choice, and your choice only. This is hard enough already. Please take care and give yourself time to heal... *hugs*

With my first MC I was a little over 7 weeks. The only person that we’d told was my sister. It was really hard but we did tell our parents, siblings and close friends after we miscarried. It was horrible to have to tell it after the fact but I’m so glad that we did. The fact that they know made it so much easier because they didn’t make any insensitive comments about when we were going to have babies, etc. because they knew what we’d gone through. The support that they gave us was really amazing.

Because of that experience we told them immediately with this pregnancy because, even if something happened and we lost the baby, we wanted to have the opportunity to celebrate the baby with our family instead of jumping straight into grief.

I’m so so sorry that you’re having to go through this. It is truly heartbreaking. It really is a completely personal decision and no one should pressure you into telling people who you aren't ready to tell.

Like everyone else said you need to tell who you are comfortable with. I'm a teacher and my building knew with some of our family and friends. I really needed the support but that's just me.

I'm so sorry this is happening to you. HB was a great support for me. It was like a breakup for me. People are concerned and caring for a few weeks but we're working on 3 months out and some days are bad days still. HB has been where I can still find support. Hugs.

I'm so sorry about your loss. When we miscarried at 20 wks, we told people because everyone was waiting for an announcement of boy or girl. Instead we had to say we lost the baby.

I think it depends on how you feel. I needed to talk about it and so it was helpful to talk to others, however, I loved the times that I went places and nobody knew what I was going through. If you don't feel comfortable telling, don't do it. Do what you feel comfortable with and want to do.

Hugs and prayers!

I'm so sorry you're going through this.... I agree with everyone else that this is so deeply personal and the decision to tell people should only be up to you and your husband. We are here to listen and offer support whenever you need it - thank you for sharing this with us... big big hug.

I'm so sorry..

One of our friends emailed us letting us know that she had miscarried.. felt really weird about it because they never told us in the first place that they were pregnant!

I would do what makes you comfortable and probably wouldn't tell your husband's siblings.

I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. No one should have to go through this.

Also, I kind of want to come smack your MIL for insisting on anything at a time that is so personal and should be completely up to you. geez.

I miscarried at 6 weeks six months before getting pregnant with my son (who is currently 18 months). We hadn't told anyone about the pregnancy, as we found out I was pregnant just weeks before Christmas and were going to tell only family when we saw them at the holidays. I will say, having no one to rely on when the shiz hit the fan was really horrible. I ended up seeing a therapist b.c I felt like I had no one to talk to other than Hubs, and I think he got worn out with all the talking that was going on. I agree with Running Elley - I told a few more people earlier with the second pregnancy so that I could have that time of being happy without jumping straight to calling my Mom sobbing and spilling the entire unhappy story.

I'm so sorry to hear this... it is such an awful thing to go through.

My miscarriage was sort of drawn out, with a couple weeks in limbo. I told friends/my parents during this time... I basically said, "I have bad news... I'm pregnant but it's not looking good...chances are slim that it's going to stick"... I found it really helpful to have them to lean on during that time and to talk to about it afterwards. I was glad that I hadn't told them initially... I found it easier to break the bad news that way... I think it would have been harder to tell them if they had been all excited for me first. I actually hadn't told anyone except for my sister before I starting spotting and I was super glad about that... but like I said, I did find it helpful to tell people once I started going through a rough time.

Everyone is different though... do what feels right for you. Your IL needs to mind her own business.

Hugs.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

We hadn't told anyone except my mom and one SIL, and those were the only people we told we lost the pregnancy.

After we got pregnant again, we told more of the family (DH's siblings, and his parents) not only about the new pregnancy, but about how our struggles getting pregnant, and about miscarrying.

I think it's a very private, painful thing, and if you aren't comfortable telling people about it, you shouldn't, but they may be a source of comfort to you now. I regret not telling my BsIL/SsIL sooner, because as it turns out both of my SsIL had miscarriages themselves, and I think would have been really supportive of me when I really needed it.

So so sorry!

When I miscarried I wouldn't talk about it at first to anyone and didn't want anybody to know, for fear that they'd make me talk about it. I just wanted to sit at home and cry for at least a month. Our families (parents and siblings) were the only ones who knew I was pregnant, and DH had the job of telling them that I miscarried.

As for other people, as time went on, I felt more comfortable telling people. After a few months I told some close friends. And now that it's been a couple of years I don't mind sharing my story with pretty much anyone.

I would make your DH deal with your MIL. This is something that's already hard enough on you, you don't want to do something that's going to make it even harder. You should be able to do whatever is comfortable for you.

So sorry you have to go through this. All I can say is youshould only tell the people that you want to tell. Its just that simple, dont let anyone get into your head and tell you what to do or how to feel. Your MIL doesnt get to decide who you share such personal infor with.

I'm sorry for your loss.

No advice here. Just wanted to say I'm so sorry for your loss

i am so sorry for your loss.