DH and I are at the point where we are considering options for adding a second child to our family. We currently have a son who's 1. I'm not sure that I want to go the biological route for #2 - I will only be able to get pregnant with the help of an RE (thanks to PCOS), and I had a tough time with pregnancy last time. I had GD, pregnancy induced hypertension, came close to having pre-eclampsia (kept having to do the stupid urine catch), had Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction, and at was on bed rest the last couple weeks of pregnancy.

Part of me would love to adopt a child, but I'm not sure what type of adoption would fit us. For one thing we just bought a new house over the summer and poured most of our liquid assets into the down payment, we don't have $20k-$30k to spend on domestic infant or international adoption. We would consider foster to adopt, but everything I read about it is so intimidating.

I fear that we're not equipped to deal with a special needs child. A lot of the waiting kids also have descriptions that say best with "experienced parents" or best as the the youngest or only child, which obviously doesn't work. And then there's the whole daycare issue. We both WOH full time and our son goes to daycare. If we adopt a daycare age child there may be difficulty getting our daycare to find a spot. It's also difficult with work to suddenly have a placement and take 3 months off with no notice.

The other consideration we have is age. I'd really like for my kids to be close in age. If I could have another child exactly D's age, I would. But either way I'd like them to only be 2-3 years apart. As time goes on, this number becomes a moving target.

So anyways, I'm kind of lost and feeling overwhelmed in terms of what are our options are. Maybe we don't have any because we're too picky? Does anyone with more experience or knowledge in this area have any thoughts for me?