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@Goldengirl: to me falling asleep with a pacifier definitely counts falling asleep on his own! He's only 4 months!

Our son was given a paci in the NICU shortly after being born and we just went with it, he loved it so much. Huge pain to keep putting it back in at night but after we purchased a Wubbanub and a few months went by, he could get it himself. We stuck with it at any time for the 8-9 months then cut back to only long car rides and sleep. Did that until he was 26 months! Then over a long weekend we took it away and it wasn't as bad as I thought. We explained it to him and just went cold turkey. A couple days of longer than usual to get to sleep for night and naps but he was back to normal in a week.

I would just make sure it isn't his only 'lovey' as our son was attached to his wubbanubs as well as his blankie and stuffed puppy so just gravitated towards them when we took it away. I actually plan on doing the same when we eventually have a second as it was a lifesaver for quite a while for sleep...I might take it away sooner but other than that it was fine and didn't hinder him at all IMO

Our first went through this routine, and it was a nightly 90 minute exercise of replacing her pacifier for her. I was miserable but didn't know how to stop. We persevered. She eventually learned how to replace it on her own. We took her pacifier away at 17 months with no impact to sleep.

Our second was as dependent upon her pacifier and learned how to find it earlier. We also made sure it was easy, we loaded her crib up with about 6 every night. I didn't want to relive the 90 minute replacement exercise nightly. She dropped her pacifier at daycare for nap around 10 months. We took it away completely at home at 18 months, again without issue.

I say, do whatever feels best for you. Sleep is hard!

Another vote for definitely keeping it. We let ours keep their pacifiers for naps and bedtime until their third birthday. We talk it up that at their birthday they are now big and cannot have the pacifiers anymore. Still not at three with our DD1 but with DS1 it was absolutely no issue.
We had actually talked to a speech therapist about pacifier-use and she said to avoid letting them talk with it and to cut it by three. We stuck to those two things.

I'll give you the OMG perspective - my daughter is a few months away from her 4th birthday and she still uses a paci to fall asleep at night. I've wrecked myself with worry about this since she was a year old, vowing to take it away at every opportunity. We tried a few times and failed miserably, and last summer (she was just past 3), I just decided to stop worrying about it. Our dentist says that she doesn't have any issues with her teeth or mouth, etc. She uses it only at night, and it usually falls out once she's asleep. She's super verbal, has no articulation issues, etc. And perhaps the biggest issues for me is that for her, the paci seems to be a physical need. She doesn't ever ask for it if we take it away or don't give it to her, but her body just can't seem to slow down. She keeps talking nonstop, even when she's exhausted, she tosses and turns like crazy, and she ultimately does fall sleep but it might be hours after she's exhausted herself and she's very restless at night if she fell asleep without it (but sleeps fine without it if she fell asleep with it). I've talked with our pediatrician, dentist and a friend who's a speech specialist with a few decades of experience, and none of them are worried about it. She's grown out of a lot of other things on her own, and if it seems like she's not needing it or her system calms down more on its own, then so it goes, but as long as it's not causing her issues, I don't want to spend my time obsessing about it.

That said - at 4 months you definitely have nothing to worry about. You might have a kid who's very dependent, like mine, and a kid who drops it on their own without a problem. They're learning to soothe and their systems are growing, do whatever helps get them there.

We did cry it out with extinction... I like to think that's sleep training because it makes me feel better about it
And like I said, she doesn't cry before bedtime anymore and she still doesn't get a pacifier (unless she puts it in herself).

@Goldengirl: We did sleep training with the pacifier, she could soothe herself with it. To me, it's like having a lovey at night when they sleep-there's no issue with them using one at night for sleep training. We didn't have to sleep train until she 7-9 months or something like that so she could already put the pacifier in herself.

We used the Ferber method to sleep train around 5.5 months old. It went great - only took 3 nights. Definitely used the paci! Around 1 year we weaned to just paci for sleep/naps/car rides.

@Goldengirl: when we night weaned (bottles) we used the paci to extend the time between feeds.
We did extinction CIO so not much use of paci in those situations. But I think having it when he went to bed and eventually being able to replace it himself helped sttn.

Similar to Mrs. Oatmeal, I made myself sick with worry and embarrassment about my older daughters pacifier use. I kept saying I would take it away and never could. It was horrible getting her down to using it only for sleep, I was terrified of removing it completely. When she turned 3, I told her that whenever she lost or broke one, that was it, I wasn't buying anymore. And LO and behold they both got cracks in them on the same weekend. She threw them away herself (she was about 3 years 3 months at this point) and that was that. Seriously, nothing to worry about. If it helps you and your baby sleep better, go with it!

@Goldengirl: Around 4 months - yes. 4 months is also a sleep regression, so there was interrupted sleep and we'd have to go replace the pacifier. Eventually, they were both able to replace it themselves and that made it a lot easier!

I was delighted when DD1 finally took a paci around that age! We coslept so it wasn't hard for me to pop it back in occasionally MOTN. We weaned just before she turned 2. I'm currently hoping DD2 will take a paci too! The pro way outweighs the cons for me.

We did Ferber around 5-6 months with LO1 and he either figured out how to replace the binky himself or just fell asleep without it sometimes. At 2 we stopped letting him have it anywhere except bed. At 3.5 he decided to give it up.

My DD didn't really like the paci til about 4 months, but once she started, she was hooked on it! For almost a couple months she used it consistently for naps and night sleep, and she'd wake anytime it fell out and we'd have to go replace it for her to fall asleep again. It got worse and worse til we were replacing it almost hourly, which was so tough since she had been a really good sleeper from about 2-4 months. I decided that this was not sustainable for me to keep my sanity and we took it away cold-turkey at about 5.5 months, with extinction CIO (had to do extinction, checks just made her more mad). The first night she cried for 45 minutes, the second about 20, the third, 7, then not at all after. She went back to sleeping 8+ hours straight after that, and 11+ by 7 months.