At what age do you think it becomes inappropriate for a parent of the opposite gender to be nude in front of their child? What about a parent of the same gender?
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I'm not sure about this.... DD often walks in on me getting dressed and I don't have a problem with this. DH is super careful about being nude in front of her, even when she was an infant.
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Good question! I tell DH he needs to, uhm, cover up more and more often and our DS is only 10m.
DH thinks it's fine however. I think I'm just a prude. lol
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My LO is a year and it still doesn't even cross my mind to worry about this. Maybe at 2?
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I have the same question! When I get home from work, I always go change into my pjs and I take Xander with me so he's in the room with me while I'm changing. He's 9.5 months. I'm kind of thinking while I'm still breastfeeding, it has to be okay, right??
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Maybe 3 or 4? I really don't know.
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Probably until my LO is potty trained??? At this point, we haven't started, but she's definitely interested in the toilet and seeing me use the bathroom...and I understand modeling behavior is helpful...????
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When they can start describing things in detail to others?
hehe
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I am not sure either. I think age 1 for the opposite sex? I will have to feel it out.
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Meh, not that worried about it. My family used to sauna together nude (still does!). I mean, we would wear towels, and weren't flaunting it, but it didn't really bother me. When it makes her uncomfortable we will stop.
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My DS is 5 and I have been wondering about this. He has no desire for privacy yet. I asked my sister since she has older kids and she said her kids just naturally moved away from it on their own btwn ages 6-7
Personally it doesn't bother me - its just body parts and its allowed great discussions about boys vs. girls
I am however trying to encourage my 5 yr old to close the door when he goes to the bathroom
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Hmm, I guess for opposite sex parent, maybe around 18 months or so? Maybe when they become more aware...
For same sex parent - I don't think it's a big deal. I mean, my mom and I still share a changing room in dept stores to this day
We used to also go to Korean saunas together and there's lot of nekkid-ness there!
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I don't worry about this with my LO because my husband isn't the type to walk around naked regardless haha. But I'd say around the time she starts talking is probably the time to be a bit more careful about what she sees
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We have a three year old and I don't see a problem yet. I really can't afford to have much privacy with two toddlers in my life. Maybe if he starts asking questions I will reconsider but for now he's totally unfazed.
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It's been on my mind lately (I sleep in underwear only) and DH brings C to our bed in the morning on the weekends before I get up and during the week while I get ready (which I also do in usually just underwear). C is almost 3 and he points out "naked" vs. dressed but that's about as much as he has conceptualized or verbalized. Once he started pointing out naked though it started to weigh on my mind. I'm debating on starting to get used to the idea of wearing something to bed and putting on a robe in the mornings while I get ready though I really don't want to.
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DH hates when LO sees him changing, she always pushes the bathroom door open when he's in the shower, she's 14 months. I think in a few more months we will be more careful about it.
For me, I dont' know, I remember my mom cahnging in front of me all the time, it never "scarred" me so I think same gender will be longer.
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@cmomma17: Yes!
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I don't think there is a set age. Just whenever someone gets uncomfortable with it. My oldest is 4.5 and I'm trying to teach him about privacy (like, please poop with the bathroom door shut lol) but he's ok being naked in front of us. I still change in front of him too. He doesn't seem to even pay attention to it.
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hasn't even crossed our minds. we're a pretty open couple/family- we're not too concerned about it.
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Wow, so far the answers have been far younger than I expected! SO is very conservative about nudity, so I doubt he would ever be comfortable being nude in front of a daughter, if we had one. I don't think it's a big deal, they're body parts, as long as they aren't being used in a sexual way, I don't see the harm unless someone is uncomfortable.
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@NurseMommy: can I ask why it's different for opposite/same sex parent? A few folks have said this...I guess I'm missing something?
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I'm going to say 3 or so. Whenever that magic period of kids actually remembering moments for life starts.
My dad waited until I was maybe 10 or older and I still have memories I'd rather not!!
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I'd say when they develop their own sense of modesty. The courtesy of privacy goes both ways. What's that 2 or 3 yrs old? I don't see being in a state of undress as all that weird at any age.
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DS is only 14 months and DH and I have no problems being nude in front of him. I'm not really sure when we'll stop. I remember showering with my mom all the time. I'm guessing around 5-6.
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@mrsjyw: Same. We are really open so I assume LO will follow suit.
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I don't know... for same sex maybe 5 or 6? For opposite sex maybe 3 or so? Haven't thought about it too much, to be honest.
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@NurseMommy: Great thread!
I really have no idea what we'll do. I imagine that my partner will be weird about being naked in front of our LO, especially as they get older. He still covers his butt when he's around me, haha. I probably won't care as much ... I really hope we can teach our kids that bodies are just bodies. Parts are parts; nothing to be embarrassed about.
BUT, I also think there's not really a need to be nude in front of your kids after a certain age. I imagine I'll want my personal time to be mine once they're able to be independent. So, probably 4 or 5??
My parents did a great job with that fine balance. My mom will (hopefully) be there for the birth, and I have NO issues being naked in front of her. I guess that means I wasn't scarred as a child, hah.
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DH and I aren't that private...
But DS is 4 and when I'm about to get dressed in my closet, I tell him I need my privacy but sometimes he barges in haha. I don't think there's much I can do.
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My husband and I still shower with my son at 15 months old. It doesn't even cross our mind at this point, but I'm sure with time we'll know.
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When my child expresses discomfort and requests privacy themselves, I'll respect that.
Otherwise, I'm not going to make a big deal out of it and end up wrongfully convincing my child there is something wrong with or bad about the naked body that I'm trying to hide. -
My DD is 5 and is has gotten uncomfortable for both me and my DH to change in front of her. Because she is super curious and asks lots of questions, lol.
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Haven't really given it too much thought. DD is only five months, but we bathe/shower with her, and both change in front of her. When privacy is requested, or she begins to grow uncomfortable or inquisitive to the point where it borders on inappropriate, we'll make changes. While I want her to be instilled with enough modesty to remain safe, I would never want her to think that there is anything wrong with the naked body.
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We'll have to cross that bridge when we come to it, because neither my husband or I are very private about nudity! I'm guessing our son will voice or demonstrate when/if it bugs him and we'll respect his boundaries.
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I would say 3.5 years old, but if I say that I'll never get to shower! Unfortunately DD (who is 3.5 years old) was in the room yesterday when I got my Strep B test done before delivery, that is something I wish she hadn't seen...... She thought it was HILARIOUS though.
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I don't know. LO is almost 20 months and DH has stopped being naked in front of LO because she points at his penis and laughs when she sees it
I try not to be naked in front of her too much but not out of modesty--when she sees my boobs she wants to nurse and when she sees my butt she tries to chase me around and grab it. Crazy. But we still shower together sometimes. I had a mom who walked around in her bra and panties...I DEFINITELY do not want to be that type of Mom. Scarred for life.
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hmmm good question. I have already wondered at what age it's inappropriate to not wear a bra around my hypothetical son. Or even my daughter...I saw way too much, and even now, feel like my mom isn't dressed appropriately sometimes. I'm just modest, even at home, and so is my husband. I think when they start to become aware and/or request their own privacy and become cognizant of what that means, will be the time to implement it. It's not like it's something to be ashamed of, but surely you can wait 5 minutes for me to put my pants on.
@mrsjazz, LOL! Your poor husband, HAHA
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DD is 19 months and we both are still naked in front of her bDH even still bathes with her. She doesn't pay his penis any attention so we don't see the big deal. I do think he will stop with her before I do. I still see my mom naked. I don't think it's a big deal. But when she wants privacy for herself, I will respect that and follow her cues
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@blackbird: I know. I felt so bad for him but that didn't stop me from falling on the floor and laughing. We are very inappropriate and told her that she can't do that to her first boyfriend or he's going to cry.
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@cmomma17: Haha, I actually remember once when I was in that totally awkward pre-puberty phase, my little cousin walked in on me in the shower and was like "Why don't you have lots of hair down there like my mommy??" I was totally mortified. Haha.
I don't hang out naked regularly, but I don't think I'll ever find it to be an issue for DD to see me naked if I'm just like changing or something. If I ever went to the pool with my mom we always shared a family change room or just the open area, even now. Probably like 4 or 5 for a boy?
And I know it's totally unequal treatment, but I kind of feel like she shouldn't see my husband naked after she's about two or so? I just see less situations where he'd be in a position where he was necessarily naked and singularly responsible for her after that age.
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DH started covering up almost immediately, and definitely does now that DD seems to be interested in staring (and sometimes trying to touch!) what's between DH's legs LOL
DH thinks it's fine however. I think I'm just a prude. lol
hehe
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56 comments