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These reports have had me on edge!!! We were at the airport today and Target right after. I'm finding myself thinking about this - at the airport, I carried her (generally I'd let her walk and hold my hand), and at Target, I strapped her into the stroller (she's over 3, so I usually wouldn't use the strap since she wouldn't try to climb out).

But yes, I do think we'd hear more about this ... if it happened to wealthy white families. Many victims of human trafficking (under 18 years of age) are from low-income areas, or teens without much parental supervision.

Nearly twenty (maybe more?) black girls have gone missing in DC, without much coverage. And, no one cared about the water crisis in Flint, MI, but if it happened in OC, it would be a different story.

I had a situation happen like this to me about a year ago. A guy was following me while I was grocery shopping, no cart, no one with him and the way he stared at me gave me chills. I was VERY mindful as I continued shopping and made sure he was not near me before I left the store. Thinking of it now, I should have said something to someone there before walking out of there on my own.

It's sickening the things that happen in this world.

@youboots: I had the same thought as you- it's very scary to think about, but wouldn't it be all over the news if it was happening for real? But then I also think about all those missing kids @littlejoy: mentioned in DC, which is heartbreaking and real.

I agree with the snopes article though.

@skipra: yes. According to what I read, the D.C. Girls were not all going missing at once but rather the police Department just started posting missing minors on Twitter and so posted all of them at one time even though some have been missing for years. Someone incorrectly assumed that all of them went missing in 24 hours. None of them were abducted apparently. Ran away. Still all terrible situations and the fact that so many minority women are running away speaks volumes about what our society is lacking in support for young people, especially those of color.

Real or not they have me on edge. At what point/age is it safe for my daughter to not be by my side at the store. I often am shopping with other kids or even alone with her but I let her stand at one end of the isle to look at something while I look at labels etc for what I'm shopping for. She's well within eye site but if someone really wanted to grab her and run I'm sure they could

I get that this is totally scary to imagine and I'm not saying that trafficking NEVER happens this way or that there aren't other creepy people who may have bad intentions, but from the trainings I've been through with my job on spotting victims of trafficking, I tend to be skeptical of all these posts. My understanding is that while most of us think of trafficking as "getting kidnapped and taken to a completely different location/country" it's much more often that someone (the pimp/trafficker) builds a relationship with a young girl (preteens to early teens typically) and through that relationship gets her to begin performing acts for money that she does not receive and of which she has no control. Then once the pimp/girl relationship is more established they often will move girls in a circuit to rotate them so they stay off guard and no one can find them again if they do suspect they are being trafficked.

There is some really terrifying stuff with trafficking that people don't realize, like your child can be living at home and still be a victim of trafficking. One example was a teenager that would go to bed each night, but was really sneaking out, working for her pimp all night, and then coming back home before morning. Her mom finally became suspicious--dropping grades, tired all the time, and some other things--and had a friend that worked for an organization to do a search and discovered the girl was on several websites being advertised. I think people tend to think of trafficking and prostitution as very different things, but my understanding is that they usually look very similar on the outside. The only difference is that a victim of trafficking has no control or choice in what she/he is doing.

I'm happy to be corrected if someone with more knowledge than me knows more about it. I think the kinds of things described in these posts may happen in the US and may happen in other countries, but it will rarely be to the middle class mom with her kids at Target, etc. A more likely target for a trafficking victim is a person with a low socioeconomic status, no father figure, and other similar risk factors. The risk of abducting a mom or kids in the scenario is so much higher than finding simply an at risk pre-teen to groom into trafficking.

I think posts like this is largely unnecessary fear-mongering...she's "almost sure" they were targets of human trafficking? Human trafficking is a huge problem. But personally I think rather hysterical conclusion-jumping like this actually draws away from the real issue. Stranger abduction is extremely rare. Most sex traffickers aren't going to be targeting families, or children with their parents close by. It's not worth the risk. They're MUCH more likely to be looking for far more vulnerable children -- runaways, kids or teenagers with bad home lives. Often they get to know their victims first, lull them into a false sense of security, and then get the victims to go somewhere with them willingly. Think about it: there are sadly many vulnerable children and teens out there, so why would a would-be human trafficker risk going for ones out and about WITH their parents, who would surely notice them missing fairly quickly? I've seen this story all over the place, and I just wish people would spend half the time and energy working out ways to help those most at-risk rather than scaring parents with stories like this one.

Yeah, I think that most people are highly suggestible and the more they read these stories on social media, the more they are convinced that people are trying to harm them.

Also, several times these stories have had racist undertones.

The people are described as being "weird" but they are doing fairly normal things (sitting on couches at IKEA! For long periods of time! Like so many people do when their daughter/spouse/aunt/son is making a 2 hours long return downstairs or while their kid is in the play space or while their MIL and wife are picking out new bedroom furniture for hours), and they are usually "foreign" and "have accents".

I'm not saying abductions or odd public behavior *never* happen, but I think it's way more rare than all these social media posts suggest. Also, just staring at other people in public isn't a crime. It's called people watching.

@MrsSCB: yeah, so....on a related note. My mom lives in a gated subdivision in the south. And it's a huge subdivision with different areas of different styles of houses, all centered around a common pool, movie theater, and gym just for the subdivision. And there are several "busybody" types in her neighborhood and they all have an online message board, kind of like Next Door.

My mom was just here visiting me and told me about some "drama" going on. A resident was robbed (they left their garage door open, and a bunch of stuff was stolen while they were home). The resident messaged the whole group to just say, double check that your garage doors are down and report any suspicious activity.

Immediately, a woman (a white woman) messaged the whole group (we are talking hundreds of residents) saying, "I just saw a suspicious black man walking alone last evening!" And she described him.

And then a resident of the subdivision responded and said.
I may have been that "suspicious black man". I'm black. I have lived in this subdivision for 9 years with my wife and our three kids. I am also a captain in the Air Force and I often walk from our house to the gym, because keeping fit is important for my job. The act of me walking from my house to our gym outside should not be considered suspicious. And it should not be suspicious if my children are walking in our own neighborhood at night. We like to exercise, just like many of you."

BOOM! I was downright gleeful at his response. Good for him!

I agree with many of you who are suspicious of these stories.

Re: the Washington, DC girls all being runaways - yeah, doubtful. When I was 14, a classmate/friend went missing and was later found murdered. The Seattle police initially insisted she had to be a runaway, even though her family, friends and teachers insisted she was not a runaway and she wouldn't have runaway. They wasted valuable time not investigating her disappearance because instead they wanted to insist, without reason, she ran away. The fact that she was black, from the inner-city I'm sure had nothing to do with that determination (/sarcasm).

I absolutely believe these social media stories are blown out of proportion. However, if the result is parents being more vigilant about their children's safety, I'm not sure that's such a bad thing.

I am very skeptical that human traffickers will sit around at department stores where they will be caught on camera.

I've not had this happen to me specifically, but I *have* had many random people (of all races and backgrounds) give a lot of attention to my boys in public because they are mixed race. I am Korean and my husband is white and while its not that uncommon where we live, there have been pretty bold people at parks or in stores who come up and talk my ear off about our boys or want to talk to them or just stare really hard at them, going on and on about their mixed race heritage and wanting to talk about their various physical features. To the point where my mother has been really creeped out and told me she has been worried that someone would kidnap them from a park or something. And my husband, who is a total skeptic about everything, even gets skeeved out and leaves.

Unfortunately, lately in Asia, mixed Asian and white people have become "popular" and are featured in ad campaigns and what not. And children from Eastern Europe (where there are a lot of white and Mongol/Kazahk/Uzbekh mixed people) have become very "popular" for adoption too. I'm not saying my kids are being targeted by human traffickers, but basically people are really effing weird and I don't discount a parent feeling uncomfortable about someone paying too much attention to their kiddos.

BUT that's why when I read that original story, I was like what mom and grandma STAYS at the store for that long (30 minutes sitting on a couch!?) when you think someone is for sure stalking you? Wouldn't you just get all your stuff and leave immediately? DH and I have definitely left lots of settings with our kids before if we were uncomfortable with something - who hangs around if something feels off??

@MrsSCB: THIS JUST HAPPENED TO MY HUSBAND! We were visiting my parents, who live in a nice area that has all of a sudden become a very trendy, expensive neighborhood... so they have all of these brand new, super rich white neighbors. My husband (who is also large and bearded) decided to go walk my parent's dog while wearing a bandanna on his head since he had been doing some yardwork for them. Apparently one of these people called the police saying that "There is a suspicious man in a bandanna with a pitbull loitering in the neighborhood". He was literally just walking the dog on a leash in broad daylight.

I think a lot of people have lost all sense of what is or is not a safe situation and tend to think the worst of others. Dude walking a dog= probably safe. Dude loitering in Ikea= probably safe. I personally always loiter at Ikea while lounging on furniture and staring at other patrons because I am in a food coma.

@caterw: omg, so similar -- right down to the "loitering" thing! That's what the cop said, that someone reported a homeless man loitering. My dad was like, "if by loitering you mean sitting on a park bench, then sure. Why have benches if no one is supposed to sit on them?!" 🙄

@littlejoy: see, but I think the element of truth is what causes these types of stories to turn into urban legends and internet lore, you know? If there was no danger whatsoever of trafficking, people wouldn't get hysterical about the risk (not saying you're hysterical). But the reality is that if a child is going to get trafficked, it is likely not because a stranger snatched them at Target or IKEA while they were being supervised by their parent and grandparent (has that happened??? Ever?? Her story seemed so silly to me), but rather because they are already part of an at risk population. The whole internet saying "omg - this could happen to me" just takes attention away from the actual and potential victims.

Also on a related note, when I bought my first house I always rented out one of the bedrooms for extra income. For a year, I had a roommate who was getting her master's in a specific type of therapy for sexual assault survivors and she also worked part time at an assault crisis center. And she was constantly telling me scary statistics, but also preventative measures people can take.

Like, one scary fact (I haven't fact checked this actually, I should disclose that) that many home invasion assaults are targeted when the perp is walking neighborhoods at night and see victims through windows--and statistically, if you keep your blinds/shades open at night while you are awake and moving around, you are more likely to be a vicitim. Same with sleeping with windows open.

There were other stats she gave me. I would love to see similar information about abductions--but based on facts, not social media posts.

@Madison43: I'm not concerned about my child getting snatched from IKEA - but I will say that it made me think a little more about ensuring I have a close eye on my kiddo.

In my original comment, I said that trafficking does actually happen, but we don't hear much about it because it's not a middle class/upper class issue - sad fact of how the news industry goes.