This is my first baby and I'm so confused. He is 3 months old has become/is an awful sleeper. He is barely getting 12 hours a day total. 
You might also enjoy...
-
It's really tough, but it is all up for grabs at this point. You can set the stage for sleep but short of knocking them out (kidding) there is no way to make them sleep. Try baby wearing, he may just want to be near you and is aware enough at this age to realize you aren't the swing. Routines didn't really matter with my first until about 5 months if that helps.
-
@Waterbaby: I have no advice, but just wanted to commiserate with you as we are in the same exact situation with my 9 week old son. It's so exhausting for everyone. I hope it gets better soon!!
-
45 mins is considered a long nap up until like 6 months or so. 20-30 min naps are common and normal. They will naturally lengthen as he gets older. Just do what you have to do to get the most sleep.
-
That's around when we sleeptrained. We had a colicky reflux baby who was so chronically tired and sleep deprived (as we were we) that he was hysterical half the time and never slept more than 8-9 hours A DAY and mostly in 30 minute spurts or less. I thought I had one of those super low sleep needs kids, but everything I read said they sleep 15-17 hours a day and it just didn't seem right.
Once the colic peaked and the reflux was well under control with his new medication, DH took the reins on sleep training. DH's reasoning was our son was spending like 8 hours a day crying no matter what we did (bouncing, stroller rides, wearing, holding, 5 S'ing), so we might as well make his crying productive by teaching him to sleep. We tried gentler methods and checks, but they didn't work and checks just made DS PISSED OFF so we ultimately ended up with extinction CIO. Within a week he was sleeping 10 hours at night! A few more days after that, he was sleeping 2+ hours for naps 3 times a day, and was averaging like 16-17 hours a sleep. By 4.5-5 months he was sleeping 12 hours at night and taking awesome naps. Turned out he actually has totally normal to higher sleep needs, but needs a strict schedule and has to sleep in his own crib.
What we didn't know when DS was a newborn was that he gets SUPER overstimulated and that was adding to his inability to sleep. Once he was in a dark, quiet room with blackout shades and a white noise machine, he would pass out.
Our son needs a lot of quiet independent play, doesn't like big crowds and overwhelming situations, and still needs a rigid schedule at 16 months. BUT on that schedule he naps awesome (2-3 hours a day) in his crib and at daycare and goes to bed at 7:30pm. Most often he sleeps 11-12 hours a night unless he has a regression, is sick, or teething.
-
Thanks for the replies so far!
@Golden: I have worn him for walks but not much around the house. I'll try it!!
@peaches1038: Thanks for commiserating! Let me know if you find something that works
@catomd00: Thanks!
@gingerbebe: Everything I read says the same thing about 15-17 hours. He's definitely not getting that! My baby doesn't seem super unhappy- he can be crying and then smiling the next minute, but I know he's got to be exhausted. I'm not ready for CIO at this point. How long did yours cry for those first few nights? Sounds like he is a great sleeper now!
-
DS is not a high needs baby when it comes to sleep and wasn't getting more than 11 hours a day total. We found putting him down for naps earlier helped before he got overtired and fought it.
-
Our son (also 3 months) has pretty short naps. Every now and then he takes longer naps and I worry that he is sick. We try to get him back down when he wakes up but if he won't go down we just don't worry about it at this point. I've noticed with both of my kids (3 and 3 mo) that if they wouldn't sleep and I kept calming them they'd just stay right on the brink of crying and not sleeping, but if I let them fuss or cry just a bit, they'd expel some energy then be easier to get down. (Eta, the only better thing is if I make it to getting him down for a nap at exactly the right drowsy moment, but honestly it's not realistic to think that I'll catch him at exactly that moment every time, especially with two kids to balance.) Also my son does this thing where he always wakes up within an hour of bedtime but goes back down with no feeding then sleeps his longest stretch. I guess the biggest advice at this age I can give you is that even though sometimes it sucks a lot, try not to worry about it or the future of sleep. There's supposed to be a wonder week at about 12 weeks and I think one not that many weeks later, so it's just a big developmental time and I think they will settle down soon. Don't be afraid to try things contrary to common advice. With my daughter I worried all the time that I was keeping her up too long but at some point I remember that rather than following the "sleep begets sleep" rule she did better if I left her awake at certain times and then she would get sleepy (more like an adult or older child) and sleep better. I wish I could give you sound advice but it does get better! Hang in there!
Reply
Subscribe to our newsletter
- Google Plus
- Stumbleupon
- Twitter
- Facebook
- Pinterest
- Favorite0
7 comments