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I had a high needs baby (he is 3 now) and he isn't sleep trained. We have a bit of a different story, but before we knew what his problems were, we would put him down to scream in his crib (this was at just weeks old). He has never trusted sleep since then.

So, since we found the problems, we let him sleep in his swing with a swaddle and the white noise machine. This was part of the 5 s' (the best thing I learned). This worked well until about 5 months old.

Dr. Sears is the only person I found with any high needs baby help and he recommended co-sleeping. At 6 months old, he was failure to thrive and we decided we needed to nurse more often and chose to do that by co-sleeping (I worked and couldn't pump more).

I have also found that my son, specifically, is a kid that was much more successful when he showed he was ready for something. I couldn't ever force him to sleep or eat or much of anything. When he decided to sleep through the night he did it (around 18 months, when we started night weaning and he had finally gained a lot of weight).

No advice, just a welcome and hope you can find some relief!

@misstatas: Hi! I am in kinda the same boat ... struggling with sleep. I'm soaking up all this advice for myself. Hang in there!!

@misstatas: both of my girls were/are high needs babies but for different reasons. My 5 month old has reflux so I understand about how hard it is to put her down. But, since she's my 2nd, I'm more go-w/-the-flow than I was w/ my first (who I was adamant about sleep training).

Some babies just need more attention. If you're ok w/ how things are, go at your own pace. I do think it's too early to sleep train, and it will be much harder to do on a baby w/ reflux.

I would say the first step is to work on putting the baby in the bed, drowsy but awake. I'm on my phone now, so I can't easily get to the link, but @Sandy had a really good post a couple of years ago that really helped me w/ my first. I'll try to come back and add the link when I find it.

Found it!

http://boards.hellobee.com/topic/what-to-do-before-sleep-training#post-95555

My baby wasn't really high needs - she was colicky but had no reflux or medical issues. We sleep trained her around 4 months using CIO. I thought it would be awful because usually when she'd cry it would just get worse and worse. But the first night she only cried for 20 minutes and by the 3rd night she was fine. She's now 2 and LOVES her crib. She could lie in there all day playing and talking to herself.

Find a method that sounds good to you and just go at your own pace. Take each method with a grain of salt and do what you're comfortable with. For us, having a lovey for her really helped.

we did something similar to what @travellingbee: posted. first i nursed to sleep for bedtime, then that didn't work, so we did the 5s (which we had been doing for naps prior) and then when that stopped working, she had found her hands, so we transitioned her to a partial swaddle with her hands and then to sleep sacks... so a gentle transition for sure, but it took from about 4-5 months when she fell asleep on her own by sucking on her fingers (she still does this at 19 months) to extending her naps around 6 months on her own.

good luck! sleep is so tough!

@misstatas

First, I totally understand what you mean about having to doctors to tell you to sleep training without instruction. It can be very frustrating and scary. As a pediatric sleep consultant I can assure you that a sleep method only works for you and your baby when you are really ready. I work with a lot of children with high needs who struggle with sleep. What I have learned is that we aren't meeting their individual sleep and feeding needs. Often times, without even realizing it, we are putting our babies down at the wrong biological times or when they are overtired. I also say to look at a baby at 90 minutes to figure out their sleepy cues before become overtired at 4 months. I hope this helps