Did anyone just do sleep training for night wakings? My LO goes does well at bedtime. I put her in the crib, drowsy but awake, and she falls asleep on her own. She can also fall asleep on her own for naps (albeit very short naps). My ped said that at this age (14 weeks), she should be able to sleep all night without a feeding and I can leave her in there if she cries. But she usually wakes up once a night to feed, usually around 4am. I am really undecided on whether I should leave her in there to cry or not....anyone?
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I think it depends on if she is really hungry or not. I believe that babies are designed to need to eat at least every 6 hours. When you do a night feeding, is she really hungry? How many hours is she sleeping before/after this night feeding?
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My 4 month old was waking up once a night til she got a cold 3 weeks ago, and has been up every 2-3 hours since. She actually nurses though when she wakes, not comfort sucking, and goes right back to sleep. She's also HUGE, so while she "should" be STTN I'm not forcing it. I feel like some babies just have different needs. My husband pointed out last night how he wakes up often at night with dry mouth from the heaters and asked if it was possible she was too - never considered that before!
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@Thehistoryofus: she does maybe half of a regular feeding. We put her down at 7:30pm, so its a 8-9 hour stretch which is good. I'm so anxious over this because I really cannot function at work on limited sleep - it takes me forever to fall back asleep. I go back to work full time in a month. But of course I don't want to starve my baby. DH isn't really on board for letting her cry but he doesn't have to get up to feed her. I just don't know if letting her cry is the right thing to do. She has done 11-12 hour nights before so i do know she is capable.
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@JessLC: have you thought about doing a dream feed? If she goes down at 7:30, could you stay up until like 10:30 and feed her then? Then hopefully she could sleep a good 6 hours after that?
Is there a reason your husband can't get up to do a feeding?
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@Thehistoryofus: that might be a good idea. I didn't even think of it. Thanks! Re: dh, she fights the bottle a lot. She will cry for an hour before drinking it so I'd be awake for that even if my husband did feed her. And he travels for work so he isn't at home for several nights a week.
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14 weeks seems awfully young for your doctor to be saying that she should be STTN with no night wakings. We didnt train for night wakings until she was 6 months old and seemed like she was ready.
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Aw good job on getting her to fall asleep on her own! I do think it's a little early to get her off the night feed IF she cries for it.... If she sleep through on her own though then great. I agree a dreamfeed before you go to bed could stop her waking - works for us!
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I agree with @zippylef. 14 weeks is really young for a doctor to say that a baby should be STTN. It sounds like she's a great little sleeper so far and already doing a really long stretch. If you don't think she's genuinely hungry then you can try offering a pacifier first (if she takes one) to see if she'll go back to sleep. I know some people have had success getting their babies to sleep through that waking by doing that.
We sleep trained for a 12-1am nightwaking that became a habit after a vacation at 4.5 months. It took one night. I don't think it would have worked earlier as my LO didn't have the self soothing abilities before that (although he's always fallen asleep on his own he could never get back to sleep in the middle of the night independently).
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DS is a fussy eater and having trouble gaining weight so I feed him whenever he wakes up hungry during the night. I usually try giving him the pacifier first and if he keeps spitting it out and won't go back to sleep, that means he's hungry. At that point, if I don't feed him he will cry and stay awake for hours. I don't know if that's just him, but I imagine if you try not to feed at 4am, you will soon figure out if she is hungry or just waking up.
I always breastfeed before I go to bed. I don't think DS even fully wakes up and it definitely helps me get a longer stretch of sleep. -
We were in a similar situation...LO started waking up twice at night, so I offered a paci for the 1st wakeup and nursed for the 2nd. Then I started offering the paci for the 2nd too, but I ended up feeling really guilty that he was going so long without food (even tho he's slept thru the night before so I know he can do it). So now if it's been more than 6 hours for the first wakeup, I'll just nurse him--but then then 2nd wakeup needs to be at least 3 hours after that or I'll offer the paci.
You can definitely try the paci to see if she'll take it, but I think one wakeup at night is still really really normal at this age--plus, for me, LO was not nursing as well during the day due to who knows what (distracted or something) so I wanted to make sure he got enough calories, even if they were at night.
ETA is she going down easily after you feed her at night? If so, then I would just feed her. If not, then maybe you can address that with some sleep training.
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Personally, I would get up and feed LO at that age. I agree with PP that 14 weeks seems young to STTN.
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I had the same debate. LO would wake up 1-2x/night, eat quick, and then go back down immediately. It was mildly annoying to have to get up since I knew she *should* be able to sleep through the night (and had before from 2-3.5 months), but I decided it wasn't that bad and I didn't want to CIO. She self-nightweaned a couple weeks ago (~9 months).
I think 8-9 hour stretches at 14 weeks is pretty good! But if the night feedings aren't working for you & your family, then you should try some other options.
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I agree with @zippylef: 14 weeks is still very young to STTN without a feeding especially if she is waking up. My understanding is that at this age you dont have to wake her up for a feeding, but if she wakes up by herself she may be hungry
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thanks for all your input ladies. unfortunately she doesn't take a paci...maybe reminds her of the bottle, which she hates! i think i might try out a dream feed at 10-11pm, and see if that works. if not, i think i'm ok with waking once a night, i just have to figure out how to fall back asleep faster. i do think she is genuinely hungry, but there is a part of me that is just wondering whether it's just a habit because it is 4am pretty consistently. the ped, the internet and the various sleep books are making me doubt she is hungry, i guess.
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@zippylef: I agree on this. I'm baffled when I see other posters talking about STTN with 3 month olds. We're almost at 6 months and still have our fair share of wakeups. Right now, he's sick, so it's expected. Our LO doesn't seem ready yet to sleep through the night. When we've had him sleep that long, it was more of a unicorn experience than a behavior.
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@JessLC: I think peds don't truly understand infant sleep and all of the popular sleep books say 1-2 feeds until 9 months is normal. Any website that says a baby can/should STTN at 3 months (or at a certain weight) is usually trying to sell you something :).
I hear you about having a hard time falling back asleep though. I struggled with that when my LO was still eating at night. 6 months later I am still waking up at 4-5am for no reason! The best thing I can recommend is to just do as little as possible (no lights, no cell phone or TV, etc.). These days I just force myself to keep my eyes closed. Sometimes I fall back asleep and other times I don't.
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LO is 5 months old and I think she still needs at least 1 feeding at night, at your LO's age I think one feeding is still necessary possibly even 2
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@sammyfab i agree! it seems strange that practically everything else has a seemingly wide range of normal development, but sleep should be through the night by a certain (very early) age/weight. Saying a baby *could* STTN is definitely different than the pressure lots of moms feel that their baby *should* STTN so early.
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