Hellobee Boards

Having a talk with her is probably the best way to handle it. I would arm yourself with some trustworthy articles regarding 3rd hand smoke and babies and let her know that you don't appreciate her putting your baby's health in danger.

I would be very upset. Did she smoke in the nursery?

We have a rule at our house of absolutely no smoking inside, and if you must smoke, you have to go outside and wear a jacket. When they come in, they have to wash their hands/rinse their mouth before they can hold baby.

Knowing many smokers, I would do something similar to @avivoca:

I think it's one thing to smoke (when you're only affecting yourself). It's a totally different situation if you're smoking in doors or smoking so much outside that you're causing the inside of a house to smell.

and if she's staying at your house, I don't think it's at all too much to ask that she change clothes/shower between smoking and taking care of your child.

My inlaws smoke. We had similar requirements like @avivoca: on them before handling the baby. It'll be the same when this one arrives. I could still smell it on my LO after she held him. The hard part was that my husband got defensive of them because of these accommodations I wanted made to protect our child. When we visit them, they smoke outside. We make sure not to have LO near them when they do. This last visit, my husband commented on the fact that even though they tried to air out the car, it still smelled of smoke.

Did you have a conversation with her beforehand about smoking around the baby?

I mean..... if that wasn't something you brought up, some people just don't think about it. Going forward, Id just make it very clear that it's unacceptable.