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The initial 6 months or so PP were so hard for me. I have always been naturally thin and since having my son I have had a muffin top even when I got my weight down I was 20 pounds over what I like for myself. What helped me was adjusting my expectations for myself. I was nursing for the majority of the time and I had to make sure not to do any crazy dieting. I now have a attitude that I'm going to embrace what I can about this new body and make it the best and healthiest it can be with new standards. It takes a lot less for me to feel good about my body now and I'm hoping that will help me when I have this baby in March and have to deal with chubby summer arms. Our bodies I'd an amazing thing for us and for our families by having these babies. It's too bad they have to change but its pretty miraculous that they can do what they did. Go easy on yourself and start slow. Love your body because it gave you T! i think you are on the right track.
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@swurlygirl: so glad it's not just me! ETA: isn't that pretty much the theme of most hellobee threads
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I'm also so embarrassed of my body. I'm a gainer - I gained 50lbs with my first (and fortunately lost it all through BF) and gained about 40lbs with my second pregnancy. Of course my mind was no where near weight loss the entire time I had Ava and even after we lost her I wasn't thinking about it. But now I'm at almost 7 weeks PP with no baby but all the baby weight. And it's so stupid but I'm extra self conscious what other people think bc I have a 3 year old and I feel like they're judging me for being a mom that just let herself go with motherhood when in fact I just had a baby. So unimportant and so stupid but I let myself feel bad about it when I'm around other fit moms with tiny babies while I'm still in my maternity clothes with no infant. It just sucks feeling bad about yourself and bad about your body.
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This is probably really wrong, but I know the message is often "your body is amazing because it made this beautiful baby"...while all I can think is "but I made a broken baby, so where does that leave me?"
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@spaniellove: Aww mama. Don't think that. He is not broken. He's beautiful and so are you.
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@sandy: I can't imagine how difficult that must be. I'm so sorry
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I so get this. I feel this exact way too. It sucks. I'm sorry
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@swurlygurl: I'd be inter ested too! I don't have any other mom friends and this kind of body transformation is so beyond what my friends can relate to..
I also find that I'm thinner in my head than in reality. Walking by mirrors and big shop windows sends me spiraling. Ugh.
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@knittylady: are you the one who just added me on fb? If so I added you!
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@swurlygurl: hahha I am! Thanks!
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@78h2o: thank you for posting this!
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I've been thinking about this thread..... I didn't post previously because I don't hate my body, not really. I'm 42lb overweight and I don't exactly love how I look but I only get depressed about it when I'm dressing up to go out and as I do that so infrequently it doesn't really matter. What I do hate though is how unhealthy I feel. I get so tired just walking up the stairs. I had some tests done recently and my cholesterol is a little raised, my blood sugar is borderline...... I owe it to E to take better care if myself. But its so, so hard.........
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I feel the same way too. I often wear dark color clothes now b/c I just don't like the way I look with lighter clothing. But, I have two beautiful (and wild, of course) boys and they are all worth every single pound that I gained trying to have them, having them, and taking care of them. I often feel I need to eat a full meal to keep up with them. *Hugs*
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I just wanted to chime in with some support and advice that I've used in the past. A lot of body transformation is due to mental training and goal setting-studies show that the more mental training you do, the more likely you are to achieve your goals (EVEN if you work out less!!!!) I've used these methods from a book with great success in the past (I had a lot to lose after E, and I'll be doing it again this year). They may seem cheesy but they help!
Set a goal. Write it down.
Set measurable goals (weight, fat %, waist measurement)
Set big goals-don't shortchange yourself
Set realistic deadlines (no lose 10 pounds in a week silly business)
Long term and short term goals
-One month, 3 month, 1 week, daily. Small achievements keep you motivated
Carry a goal card-it's a constant reminder to stay on track
Establish emotional reasons for reaching your goal-wanting to be healthier, imagining yourself healthier, running around with your kids, feeling good in X outfit, etc.
Write your goals positively-not "I hate working out", but "I feel stronger when I do this". Turn negatives into positives because negatives are poisonous
Visit goals twice a day-out of sight is out of mindJust throwing it out there if anyone finds it helpful
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@blackbird: I find that very helpful!! Thank you so much!
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@blackbird: That was really helpful! Thank you! I looooooove working out (I don't believe it yet but as least Im trying haha!).
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@Danizaur: @Cherrybee: Bahahaha good
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@blackbird: that's very helpful. thanks for sharing!
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@spaniellove: I feel like that sometimes, like I only carried D for 7 months, what's my excuse?
@sandy:
I'm right there with you guys. I'm 5lbs bigger than ibwas the morning before I had DS1. I also normally have a good self image until I see a photo. One of our friends saw pics from my sister's wedding (when I was in college) and thought the pic of me was someone else, because I was so thin I was unrecognizable, apparently. Sigh.
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I have been struggling with this a lot, although I'm only 18 weeks with my first. I used to be pretty thin and athletic until after college, when I couldn't afford to take 20 hours of dance classes a week and my PCOS and hypothyroid caught up with a vengeance. I've been struggling for years to lose the weight I packed on, and had been stuck at a plateau for over a year before I got pregnant. I didn't gain any weight the first 14 weeks but now I've started gaining and I'm having such a hard time coping. I hate being overweight, especially when the rest of my family and my in-laws are all thin. I've cried I don't know how many times over bad pictures, numbers on the scale, and abject terror of gaining a ton of weight and never being able to lose it. I hate, hate, hate being overweight and I am petrified that I'll never get my real body back
Maybe I can join the group after I deliver in June?
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@swurlygurl: walled you back
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Ugh, I feel ya. I gained 40lbs due to fertility treatments while trying to get pregnant, then only 16 while I was pregnant. Lost all the pregnancy weight in six weeks, but gained it all back plus an additional 10 lbs while on maternity leave. So now I'm 65 lbs heavier than I was, and I was already probably 20 lbs heavier than I like to be...
Last night we went out for new year's and DH put on a dress shirt. After we got home and had fun times his shirt was laying on a nearby chair, so I thought it would be cute to put it on. Except... I couldn't do it up. I' officially a larger men's size than my 6' tall husband. Womp womp... mood killer.
Maybe I can join the group after I deliver in June?
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