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I did all MOTN duties. SO had plenty of other opportunities to care for the baby and I got to nap when the baby slept during the day if I chose.

Eta: I cosleep though so there was very little actually getting out of bed once the motn pooping stopped. It all depends on your baby and individual sleep needs. I think there best thing is for your spouse to be OPEN to handling MOTN duties even if it doesn't fall that way once the baby is actually there.

II EPed and would do the 8pm feed, go to bed while Dh stayed up and fed her at 12am before going to bed. Then I would do the 4am, so right off the bat I got 8 hours of sleep.. It was amazing.

Once she started Sttn, which was pretty early, I handled any random wakeups since I was on mat leave (unless it was a particularly challenging night then we would trade off)

I did all motn feeds, because my LO didn't love bottles and wouldn't calm down and go right back to sleep with one the way she would after nursing, and I would rather get up and nurse than have to pump and wash parts and bottles every day. I wasn't going back to work so I didn't need to really get her used to a bottle or get used to pumping. And for the most part, my LO would only wake up twice a night in the early days, which isn't as bad as some.

That said, staying home with a baby in those first three months is NOT easier than going to work, at least not for me. Maybe if your SO is a surgeon or air traffic controller or something, but if they just regular working people they can do it overtired just like moms do. But, I didn't have Dh get up and do diaper changes after I fed her since we figured, I'm up anyway, so one of us may as well rest. He would take her in the morning after I nursed and I could sleep a little more then. I can almost never actually sleep during naps even when I try.

So it's different for every family. And you won't know until baby is here what works best.

I would definitely split them up, if at all possible. I read that early patterns set a precedent, and persist long after maternity leave... that was definitely true for us! I got into an early pattern of not doing MOTN wake ups, and that didn't change until our first kid was a year old and Bee got pregnant with our second. Definitely regret that...

We're doing the same as @Charm54: - our sleep schedules are staggered by one feeding with me going to bed earlier, so we can each get 8 hour chunks of sleep.

This will make my DH sound like a jerk (which he's not!) but there's no way he would take a MOTN feed with me on maternity leave. It would never happen, and actually I would never even suggest it!! I did all the MOTN wakeups with my first and have so far with my second (4 1/2 weeks). I figure that's why I'm off on leave and I can sometimes nap during the day if I want.

DH never goes to bed before 11/12 so he took first shift, so to speak. LO would go down in the early evening and sleep until 10-11ish (sort of, I mean, there were definitely days this wasn't the case) and so DH would give LO a bottle and then LO would sleep until 2/3/4ish and then I'd get up for that feed. It worked out for awhile.

@Mrs. Oatmeal: yes this is my situation. Now that I'm down to just one wakeup I don't mind. But when she wasn't sleeping at all it seemed a bit unfair that I did all the night wakeups. It's one thing to say dh needed to work the next day, but I had to be awake taking care of a baby!!

I think next time I'll try to get Dh more involved in night wakeups.

@DesertDreams88: bahaha in that case...

I wouldn't wake up to pump unless DD slept longer than usual and I was super engorged. But for quite awhile, until she slept longer stretches at night, I would pump before bed and leave that milk for DH. He would stay up until her first waking (midnight or so) and feed her. Then I'd take the other one or two night wakings. It really helped me to be able to sleep from 10-3ish, and he felt good about getting to feed her. Once she was only waking once a night around 3 or 4, I just did all of those feedings. I couldn't go that long without emptying my boobs so there was no point in both of us getting up then.

After 6 months SO did them. I have a REALLY hard time falling asleep at night - often staying up until 2-3am (so obviously if LO got up before then I'd handle it) - and if I get up after I've fallen asleep I'm up for the night.

SO can wake up for 10 minutes to feed LO a bottle and go right back to sleep so it just makes more sense.

@Charm54: this is a great idea...now if only I could get the little man to sleep until 4.

DH works from home and he has bouts of insomnia (fairly often) so if he is up, I'm sure he won't mind letting me sleep while he does some MOTN feedings. DH will also be a SAHD and I'll be headed back to work so at some point during my mat leave, I'll have to have him start taking over some of the feedings.
Before the twins come, I am leaning towards exclusively pumping. We'll see how BFing goes and how long I'll be able to BF/pump while going back to work.

I did all motn feeds but my husband is always up with me (even know at 17 months.) We are a team! Even if he isn't doing anything, he's just waiting up for me to get back in bed.

@mrbee: Completely agree, it was really important to both of us that we split up nighttime duties equally even while I was on maternity leave for that reason. We wanted to be very equal about everything, and it's a difficult thing to start doing once there's an expectation that one person does all the nighttime wakeups (plus that person becomes more of an "expert" than the other).

And don't feel too bad about it either - it's not like you'll be relaxing at home with your feet up, your days are just as difficult/tiring as your DH's work days, if not more so!

For us, I never got into pumping while on maternity leave, but it would have been nice to have DH take a full feed. Instead, he would get DS from the bassinet, unswaddle him, change his diaper, and I'd feed/burp him and put him back in the bassinet. Nights felt a lot less lonely since DH was up too (though of course he'd go back to sleep while I fed the baby).

I feed LO in the middle of the night because I'd rather do that than pump. But, DH wakes up when she cries, changes her diaper, hands her to me, and then refills my water glass and grabs a snack for me. He can do all that and then fall back asleep in 30 seconds, so it's no big deal to him and he huge help to me.

I never did with my DH. My rationale was similar to what you mentioned, I was the one home from work for maternity leave so I just did it. Plus, my LO wouldn't take a bottle AND my DH never heard the baby so it would take me forever to wake him up and ask him to tend to him, by then I was wide awake myself and it defeated the purpose. Once he was waking up for more than just eating, like teething pain or illness then I would tap hubby in to help.

I am a SAHM and I've always done almost all night wake ups. The exception was the first week or so that we were home (DH was off work too) he would get up with me to help keep baby awake while I nursed (he had to tickle her feet and rub a wash cloth on her back to keep her awake). Once I didn't need help he got to sleep while I did MOTN wake ups.

But, my DH is lucky that he doesn't have to leave work work until 8:30 or 9, and our LO has woken around 6-6:30 for most of her life. So he has always woken up with her when she gets up for the day and I get to sleep in until he has to hop in the shower at 8. Having that last good chunk of sleep has always helped me a LOT (especially because I'm a late riser).

And agree with others that with breastfeeding it just didn't make sense to have him get up. If I didn't feed I'd have to pump so why not get up.